If you saw this in church how would you respond?

Question

That if you spot your friend who's sitting by himself in church and he's crying with his head bowed (whether he lost a loved one(blood relative) or something else), you walk over to him, sit down, and put your arm around him giving him a little rub on the back or shoulder and keeping him close to you. You could be resting your head against his or holding his hand.

What would that say to others? THat you like him more than a friend or that you truly care about that person and you're comforting him? How and why?

If you saw this i n church how would you respond?

Answer 1

We have to be careful of our response to others as I have found by experience.  Your comfort to your friend maybe very sincere, but other evil minded will use it to wedge something in there.  It maybe this person's lover who will be jealous or it maybe that the person themselves take this as you wanting a relationship.  I do not want you to stop caring for others and giving them comfort, but be careful of the enemy in these circumstances.  

I know because right now I am dealing with the results of my kindness to others.  The enemy has placed jealousy where it is not called for and it has happened to me several times that the other person took this to mean something romantic. (sic)

We must however let the love of God be our guide.

God bless you with wisdom as I am finding better wisdom in these matters.  

Answer 2

  If I didn't know the two people or know them well I would assume the one person was simply comforting the other. If I knew them both well I might be able to pick up on some other dynamic, such as one being romantically interested in the other.

   Those who are looking for drama will see something lurid, those who try to live by the principles of their religion will see an act of kindness.  

Answer 3

I wouldn't jump to conclusions, that's for sure. I would probably see it as comfort, unless I knew there was more to the relationship than friendship. So it would all depend how well I knew the two personally.

Answer 4

I would just think you are comforting the person...........to me, that's what a true Christian does --- and I don't 'read' anything else into it...........

God Bless.................

Answer 5

It sounds like a loving comforting gesture.

Answer 6

I would do just what you did and not worry about what other people thought about it.  You were doing what God wants us to do, help and comfort others.  I am proud of you and your actions.  

Answer 7

that your a committed friend.

i've had total strangers come up and hug me/hold me/pray for me.

its simply Gods love shining through you.

Answer 8

First of all, if I saw a friend crying I would go over and put my arm around them, and pray with them, etc, and really wouldn't care what anyone else thought, because I was caring for my friend.  What would I think if someone was doing that with someone?  I would think , "what a great friend he/she is, I pray that I could be so caring".  

Answer 9

Just comforting.

That happened a lot last year... 2 of my cuz's died and so did a friend.... :(

Answer 10

I would promise myself to never again get so drunk on a Saturday night that I woke up in a church on Sunday morning, then I would never have to see people so worried about what is proper in church.

Answer 11

There was a monk on Mt. Athos that was crying over his sins.  A pilgrim came by and the monk went inside to hide his tears.  The pilgrim came to the door and yelled at the monk.

"You are not so holy!" the man said.  "You were trying to hide your steak dinner from me!" (monks cannot eat meat)

This story was told by the monk himself.

It is impossible to live ones life worrying about what other people will think of your actions.  We should be keeping our gaze fixed upwards towards heaven instead of looking down, trying to avoid ants.

Answer 12

I would think that the person is being kind and trying to comfort that other person. This happens in my church a lot. sometimes they go out in the hall and talk. We are a family and we love each other and are concerned for one other.  

Answer 13

I sense this is more of a question like "does he like me?" then it is about faith or church.  

Answer 14

i would think that the person is just really nice and cares about people. i would think that the person is a really good friend too. if i saw it in church i would think that more people should be like that.  

Answer 15

How old are you?

Answer 16

I would assume that you are just comforting the person if I saw that.

I dont think people read too much into comforting a crying person.

Answer 17

I agree with most of the others when they say they would only think that you were comforting someone in distress. However, it sounds to me like you might be struggling with the reactions of fellow churchgoers to an actual event.

People go to church for a lot of different reasons. Some people go to church primarily because of the social aspect. These people may be into appearances more than attending with an intent to worship God. People who are overly concerned with appearances are often paranoid of what other people will think of them if they don't conform to certain standards. That fear is broadcasted in a knee jerk reaction when they see someone do something they think is questionable. They automatically assume the worst, rather than trying to assume the best or choosing to be nonjudgmental.

I would not be so concerned with that particular group of people. Take the higher ground by forgiving them and move on with your own life. If you feel comfortable with who you are as a person (and with your own faith) what they think is really not important.

Answer 18

i would surely appreciate the humanness the person carries when he/she ready to console the suffering person

Answer 19

I would think that you were comforting someone.  I wouldn't read anything more into it.

Don't worry so much about what other people think.

Answer 20

well i go to a very small church,and more than likely i would know exactly who it is,and what the situation was.

i would go over myself and help comfort my fellow parishoner in their time of distress!