If you unknowingly infected your partner with an STD, how should you handle the situation?

Question

My girlfriend and I have had a great relationship so far that only seems to get better. I love her a lot and she loves me too. She recently got really sick and found out she was infected with Chlamydia. We think we now know I infected her because she was tested before we began dating and was negative. When she told me about this, I was devastated, confused, and angry about the situation since I never saw any symptoms, so I felt like I was in perfect health.

It has only been day one, but, I have contacted my local health clinic and past partners to find out what is going on and to hopefully get myself cured as soon as possible.

My only concern is how to handle this situation without ruining any potential future I have with my girlfriend. She is not mad at me, but she expressed that she may not be able to be intimate any more, feeling dirty and horrible due to some of her past experiences with men and s*x in general. It feels like she wants to be close, but at the same time she is distant. I know she needs her space, but I am naturally scared that this will tarnish us.

Any advice from people who have gone through this situation would be appreciated.

Answer 1

The one good thing about this is that I am just about positive it can be cured.  She just might be scared at this time.  You both can be happy and lucky it's not AIDS.  I have had friends that have died from it.  Talk to her tell her how you feel about her, she might feel you cheated on her make sure she knows you didn't or just talk to her about how she is feeling.  She might have more to her past than you know.  Use a condom and let her know from now on you both will be practicing safe s*x.  Do some romantic, apologetic things for her.