If you were adopted . . .?

Question

when would you like your adoptive parents to tell you that you were adopted?

a) never

b) when you were a young child

c) a teenager

d) an adult

And would you like to find your biological family?

Would you want your adoptive family to tell or help you find them?

Answer 1

My answer is: B, I'd like to be told  when I was a young child.

Yes, I'd want to find my bio family--

Yes, I'd expect my adoptive family to help me tell and/or find them.

I am an adoptive parent, and my son knows about his life story in simple terms (he's only 3) and when he is older, as he asks I will share with him what I know and let him know that I am there for him...  ALWAYS.

Answer 2

c) a teenager

Answer 3

i grew up knowing its one of my first memories...and i did find them..and i wish they had helped me as we lived in the same county and i went to school with my bio cousins...

Answer 4

B. I think its best to tell them right from the start.  Yes I would want to know my b-family...probably not til I was a teenager or so, I would think. Thats when you really start questioning life.(atleast it was for me) I would hope my a-parents would be supportive of it.

Answer 5

1- as it was, before i knew what it meant

2- yes, so i did

3- yes, so they did.

Answer 6

I was adopted and always knew.  Everyone has the right to his/her truth.

I have reunited with my first family.  They searched for me and I for them.

It wasn't important for my adoptive family to offer help in my search.  My amom was curious, too.

Answer 7

They told me as a young child and I’m glad they did. Do I want to find my biological family? No , I have no desire to ever meet this people. However if I did my parents have already said they would support and help me.

Answer 8

b

Answer 9

I am adopted and my adoptive parents explained to me the meaning of this as soon as they thought i could understand this so as far as i am aware i have always known as this was just an accepted thing with us it was a lot easier than for my cousin who found out that she was adopted when she was in her early teens and found it very hard to accept as her parents had a natural son by then so i say as early as possible   as to your other questions i say a resounding YES to both

Answer 10

I was told when I was very younge...and I kinda new that I was being adopted.

I have met my bio. Family and They werent what I expected.....I now know the real reason why i was taken from my mom...other than being sexually abused by her

Answer 11

I was adopted as an infant in the late 60's.  I don't remember not knowing that I was adopted, but I think I was six or seven before I knew what "adopted" meant.

I think that earlier is better. Late discovery adoptees often have to deal with trust and betrayal issues, as well as the host of other issues that come with being adopted.

I searched and found/ was found by my birthmom.  It would have been nice if my family had been willing to help, or at least discuss the situation with me, but when I let them know they didn't speak to me for almost six months.  They felt terribly hurt and betrayed.

I am an adoptive mom, involved in an open adoption.  Our son won't have to search or ever choose between his families.  He obviously knows he is adopted.

Answer 12

I was not adopted but will put my two cents in:

I think adoption should be mentioned as a regular thing, such as saying "I was so happy when we adopted you", or "you look just like your birth mom (show picture)" or just keep it normal to the best degree, so you don't have to come "out" and make it a big deal.  Normalizing it will not help them deal with loss later on (or maybe it will who knows) but it keeps it open for them to talk about their feelings about being adopted with you, and to talk about their biologoical family.