If you were forbidden to know your real name, see your real family, know your real life - would you be happy o

Question

or grateful?

Answer 1

I would be so mad I had my histroy past stolen from me it's yours no one should be able to take that from you.

You lose your heritage... your extended family is robed of one of their own. You have a name this is not your own and you have a huge chunk of your life flushed down the toilet..

Grateful would have been if someone helped my family threw their hard times instead of just taking the children and running Which is so often the case...... Real heroes are needed.. but sadly.. we get profitering corporations who only see us as file numbers and $$$$$$$$

Answer 2

If they were adopted then that would no longer be their real anything, their adoptive family would be. Your real life and real family are the people who raise you and are there for you, not the ones who created you. Good Luck

Answer 3

No, it sucks.  I know NOTHING about my medical background.  Hey, what if I'm married to my brother?  How do I know that his parents aren't the ones who gave birth to me?  

Seriously, this has happened to people.  What a tragedy.  Everyone should have the right to know their origins.

I'm glad I found out I was adopted before my grandchildren grew up and married (They're still young.).  I'm glad my kids married people from other states.  How awful if they would have married cousins or something, then gave birth to deformed children, all  because nobody bothered to tell me that I was adopted!!!

I don't care that I was adopted.  I couldn't imagine not having lived with the family who loved me for 58 years.  However, I am very sad about the lies.  EVERYBODY, except a few cousins who are younger than me, knew the truth!  Nobody slipped up in 57 years!  Finally I was told the truth because of medical issues.  Thank God somebody did the right thing!  Unfortunately, it's kind of late, and I may never find my biological family in order to get medical background which may help my son and youngest grandson with their health issues.

Not knowing just sucks!

I am missing all of my medical background.  My children are missing half of theirs.  My grandchildren are missing a fourth of theirs.  That might seem small, but it all depends on what's lurking in that medical history.  

I don't know my heritage either.  I'm very sad about all of this, and of the fact that my Mama and Daddy, who always said "Tell the truth", lied to me all my life!  I even suspected that I was adopted and ASKED outright, and Mama denied it!  

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Answer 4

No I wouldn't be which is why my adopted children know their Korean names, listen to Korean music, watch Korean children's shows,  and know that we are saving our money to go back to Korea to visit with their foster families and when each side is ready to see their First Mom (birth mom).  My children are 3 1/2, 2 and under 1.

Answer 5

I'm happy even before I found out the name on the birth certificate.  Those names do not create my identity.  I know my real family and my real life -- how could you say the life i have lived is not real?  How could you say the family that raised me and shared so much with me, including memories, is not real?

My real name is my legal name.  I am not known by any other name than mine.  The person on the OBC only existed for so long and is not legally recognized.

Answer 6

"Real" isn't quite the term I would agree to as 'real' is what my life if, regardless if it is with my bio family or not...now if you're asking about biologically in place of 'real'...then I would have to say no.  I wasn't happy with not knowing.  For me it wasn't forbidden as much as it just wasn't known.   Now, I've accepted it.  I can say that I'm happy with my life but I can't say I'm 'happy' or 'sad' about my adoption situation.

Answer 7

Well my real life is the one I have been living for nearly 25 years. My real family is the ones that raised and took care of me since I was 3 weeks old and have always guided me.  I was never named by my eggdonor so the name I have is the only name I have ever had.

Sure I wish I had medical history but I don’t so I just have deal with it. Even that is not important enough to me to want to search out genetic kin.  If I ever have biochildren and or adoptedchildren they will be getting a genetic testing done for  disorders etc.

Answer 8

Absolutely not.

I would be very frustrated.

Answer 9

I haven't experienced it, so I really don't know. I CAN'T IMAGINE what that would be like. It's incomprehensible. I have a love for genealogy and love to hear about relatives and where we came from. I like to know what my roots are. I love history. To not have that is *unimaginable* to me. To not even have the OPTION is incomprehensible. I don't know that pain first hand.

Answer 10

well i know my family, and i would take that in a heart beat. i seem nothing like my family drunken retards. sure i drink but i keep my witts about me

Answer 11

no, it is not only unhealthy to lie to a child, but also unsafe. i feel that this would cause psychological damage, and not knowing would also create a break in the bond between adopted parents and child due to deception...also, how are you planning on having EVERYONE who knows the child is adopted from telling. or slipping? also, there are medical reasons that children need to know where they came from.

please  be careful

Answer 12

I wouldn't like it...unless I had never known them

BUT I'm adopted so I know my real name...my real family and wow....this is my real life..I don't have another - and I'm happier right now than I have been in years.

And a lot of people are into the heritage thing.  I'm not.  But that's me personally.  I'm American and Texan...I've never really cared much about the hunting down ur ancestors thing - tho I know people who spend years on that.

my bmom didn't name me and I was adopted at 2 days

Answer 13

I was forbidden to know the name given to me at birth, by my REAL mother (the one who created me in her womb, labored for hours to bring me into the world and who loved me more than life).  I was forbidden to know and see my REAL family (the family who shares my genes, whom I look like, act like, share the same interests with, have the same laugh, the same eye color, the same curly hair, the same stubby big toe, the same long, slender "piano player's" fingers).  

I was NEVER happy or grateful for it.

The only time I was happy or grateful was the day I spoke to my REAL mother on the telephone after 24 years of separation.  When I heard her voice, it was a voice that seemed as familiar to me as my own best friend's...because somewhere in my subconscious mind, I never forgot it.  She IS my mother.

ETA: My REAL family loved me too; they just missed out on sharing in my life because of adoption.  They wanted to have me in their life but it wasn't their fault that they couldn't.  Adoption stole that from them.

Answer 14

if you are speaking in terms of biology, i already know all that

'real' name-illegitimate baby girl XXXXXX

'real' family-alot of closed minded jerks that thrive off hurting the ones they should love the most.

'real' life-drugs, alcohol, incest, prison, pain

not so pretty when you look at it from the real point of view.

now you know my life and story and i also know i am the last person you want to answer this question. but sometimes, the 'real' stuff isnt as glamorous as the importent stuff.

i think everyone deserves to know the real truth of where they came from, you know that. but, the 'real' isnt always better, i am living proof, i am just fortunate all that junk is in the past and everything and everyone is on track now.

i am happy, and grateful. i am saddened by my 'real' and i am elated that through it all i have a happy ending to a potential tragedy.

keep looking my friend, one day your real will be there, you just be ready♥♥♥♥

Answer 15

I am not happy.  In fact I am downright grumpy and angry about it.  My dad wanted me.  I can't know his name excuse me?  Yep I am angry.

Answer 16

not in the least...h**l, i didn't even take my husband's name when we got married.  not because i don't love him; but because my name (the one i was born with) IS my identity.