Im 22 and my parents want to adopt....?

Question

my cousins unborn child. he and his wife are seperating and neither are anywhere near financially stable to support the child. so they are giving it up for adoption and my parents asked to be considered to adopt the child. I think its great but at my age i want to be having kids, im almost jealous. I know if we get the baby ill be happy and will help take care of him/her. any suggestions on how to not feel so upset/depressed that it wont be MY child? i feel so selfish.

Answer 1

i'm sure oyur family especailly your paretns would be o so proud of you to take care of this child if they do give it up for adoption, to be able to see their grandchild grow up and to know that it is safe within your arms and heart. i'm sure you wont be so jelous once that baby is born, and remember just cause you birth a child don't make you a parent, a parent is the one who does the middle of then ight feeding and waite in a erfor hours on end to fix a broken arm, a parent is someone who loves you unconditonally no matter what you do or are.

stay strong and help your family any way you can in there time of need

Answer 2

what your feeling is normal but you will adjust. Life is full of adjustments

Answer 3

Well, although you may not see it now, this is a perfect situation.  

First of all, your parents are doing a wonderful thing in keeping the adoption within the biologic family.  This is very important, imho, to all involved, especially the baby.  

But, that's not your question.  In answer to your question, as a mother and someone who has lots of experience with newborns and babies, I will say that this will be an awesome experience for you.  

I have no doubt that your parents will be more than happy to let you have a lot of involvement with this child should this this adoption happen.  Why?  Because babies require a LOT of attention and care, and I'm sure you're parents will be more than happy to share the wealth.  Diapers, feedings, babysitting...if you're willing, you can have a lot of experience.

This is win-win for you.  This means that you will have the opportunity to be an important part of this child's life and be a very close important adult in his/her life, while learning all about caring for a child, and, most importantly you can "take a break" whenever you want to.  Most parents rarely get this  opportunity, and all the baby care needs really take it out of them.  

You may not understand what I'm talking about now, but once the baby is born...you'll totally understand.  Best to ALL of you, I hope everything works out.

Answer 4

Have your parents considered letting the family member live with them and help get them on their feet to raise the child?  Seems silly to give your child away just for financial reasons if someone is willing to help them out.....

Answer 5

I think you are being selfish. This child needs someone and you are grown. If they want to adopt the child then that is something they want to do. I think you at 22 need to grow up. If you want a child that is your business and you say that it should be your child. If you are at 22 having a child you should be able to support yourself and your child and should have no need to have your parents help. Stop being selfish!!!

Answer 6

in a way it will be your child too... you will be the sister and sisters are to be nurturing ...welcome to "almost mommyhood"

Answer 7

Its going to be your new little brother or sister (potentially).  Just think of it that way.  You get to be the awesome big sister that they can talk to when they feel like Mom and Dad don't understand.  You're going to be a big part of this child's life if you choose to be.  Its definitely great practice for having your own children some day.  Jealousy is just a part of these things sometimes.  You'll eventually move past those feelings.

Answer 8

My mom had twins when I was 22. I was happy that she was pregnant & threw her a baby shower & everything. BUt when they were born I got really jealous. I felt really stupid, but she was only my mom until then. You won't feel upset when they adopt the baby. You'll be happy.

Answer 9

I think that does sound a little selfish! Are you really going to have a baby in 9 months? By the time you have a child, the one your parents are adopting will be at least a year or older so your baby would be the new addition. But even if you were having a baby now im sure your parents would be thrilled to have a grand baby!

Sit back and think about how you and ur family are going to help this child. My parents have adopted a child who is 1 . Im also 22,married and want to have children but im not going to sit back and wine because MY baby isnt going to be the center of attention or the first new addion, Gimme a break

Answer 10

just think about what great practice this will be for when you do actually have your own! this is your very own crash course! best wishes

Answer 11

You should know that what you parents are trying to do is admirable... They love you and they will love the children that you bring into the world no matter what. A grandchild would be a blessing to them as well. You are 22 I had my first child at 21 and she was planned however I wish that I would have waited 5 years to have time with my husband. Don't be so anxious to have your own. It will come when the time is right.You should focus on being a big sister rather than a mother.