Im a girl and all my friends are guys is that really so bad?How come im so nervous around girls but not guys?

Question

this issue is bugging me my mom says shes really worried about me cause i only have two friends and their both guys but is that really so bad? she acts like they dont even count as friends. okay i admit i need more friends that are girls but its so frusturating im so nervous when i talk to girls but guys are easy to talk to. whyyy? Can someone please explain why im a girl but nervous around girls and all my friends are guys? i mean im not that manly just tough ... i had 4 boyfriends and im 16 so i cant be too guyish for girls can i? wahhh confused help please!

Answer 1

I'm 28 and most of my friends are guys. I can't remember the last time I made a new female friend. And I'll tell you why. In my experience, the women I've been friends with tend to be very bossy, catty, competitive, and melodramatic. I was once best friends with a girl, she was like the sister I never had and she said she felt the same way about me, but one day she started dating this guy and after seeing him and I sit together at lunch in the break room (we all worked together) one time she became very hateful toward me and just dropped our supposedly close friendship because she thought I would try to steal him from her. One, he wasn't cute, and two, even if he was I would NEVER do that to a friend. I once had another female friend who was very bossy and possessive. My boyfriend at the time had to go on a lengthy business trip, and when he returned I spent a good week entirely with him, although communicating via phone with my friend. Well, she didn't like that I was spending so much time with him and not with her, so she just quit speaking to me. Didn't even say, "We shouldn't be friends anymore." Just quit speaking to me, and I never knew why. It took me a month or so before I figured out she wouldn't be returning my calls.

I'm saying all of that to illustrate why I feel more comfortable with men. They don't necessarily have the same hang ups as women. And as for what Jason said about all men having an ulterior motive, that's utter bull****. I have plenty of guy friends in committed relationships, for one, and not all guys are big jerks like Jason seems to be. He just can't see it from another perspective because he doesn't know any better.

Sorry, that got out of hand. Anyway, there's nothing wrong with you. If you mom thinks there is, that's her problem and not yours. Just be happy you do have friends with whom you feel comfortable.

Answer 2

I was going to suggest that you're g*y if you get nervous around girls like that...until I read that you had 4 boyfriends before.  So, I don't know.  I don't think it's so bad that you only have 2 friends.  I only have 2 real friends (friends that I actually hang out with often).  Although, both of them are girls.  Anyway, I think you shouldn't let your mom bug you about that.  My mom was always trying to get me to make more friends, but I never really listened to her...I mean, if you have 2 friends that you can really trust and can talk to about things, then, that's good enough.

Answer 3

It is obvious to me that Jason has never worked with the bunch of guys I work with, talk about gossip. For many years women have gotten a bad rap, you will hear they are bad drivers too.

As a woman, you will realize that your friendships will come and go, you will be lucky to have just one great friend and many other good friends. Your mom is just worried about the boy factor, know that girls are just like you, nervous to meet someone new.

Just take a chance, being nervous is normal at your age, you will find "girlfriends", we always have a way of finding each other, you will happen on someone who has similar interests and the rest will be history.

Answer 4

Plenty of girls find themselves more comfortable around men. For some girls,  it is because men tend to be less judgemental of women and do much less gossiping. Other women prefer men because they need to be the center of attention. These friendships usuall involve a lot of flirting and nice coment maiking by the guys.

Whatever the reason is, women should realize that the male friends ALWAYS are interested in more. They may not want to date you, but they would be more than willing to do other things. So the male-female relationship can never be truly friendly, even if the girl is sincere about the friendship. The guy will have an alterior motive any time he gives you advice, support and engages you in deep discussions.

Also, when you finally get serious wth a guy, he may not be so comfortable with you spending all of your time away from him with other guys. Remember, he knows that deep down they would be interested in more than friendship if the opportunity ever arose.

Meet some cool girls that share your likes and dislikes. Having guy friends if fine, just remember that they will always have an alterior motive.

Answer 5

Tell your Mom to RELAX, CHILL have another Margarita!

You are quite normal. My daughter is the same way. I used to worry but she can match any MALE or FEMALE on any endeavor and come out a winner. She has set many FIRSTS (first ROTC female Commander at her high school), youngest with highest honors in college. Youngest female to acquire a Master's Degree. Youngest female to acquire multiple degrees in different disciplines. She's working on her Doctorate and should be one of the youngest Doctors when she finishes. Hooray for girls!

So you're NORMAL. Thank God for that. You're Mom should be worried if ALL your friends were of the same gender.