Im not happy anymore, but shes a sweetheart and I dont want to hurt her help!?

Question

Im just not happy in the relationship anymore, im going to break it off but shes so nice and sweet i dont want to upset her to much. The problem is i cant give the attention she deserves and I know it upsets her and that upsets me. What should i say to her. I was going to call and have a conversation about it because we live about 20 mins away from eachother.

Answer 1

tell her in person.  it will hurt but it shows that you are better than that.  she will get over it.  just tell her the truth.

Answer 2

Don't be a wuss.... talk to her face to face.  You owe her that.  If your not happy, your not.  It isn't always something the other person did wrong... sometimes people just don't click.  You don't want to waist her time or your own.. if you know it's over.. then end it.  Be nice.. be decent.  But don't do it over the phone.. that's weak.

Answer 3

Just be honest like you wree right here.  Tell her what you just said.  that you care about her, but she deserves blah blah...you know what you want to say.

Just be open and honest.  Because if you leave her without closure, she will drive herself, and you, nuts trying to get it.

Nice girls get dumped all the time.  Don't feel bad, you are just not happy.  I hope you gave it a fair shot though.

Good luck and I hope y'all hang in there.

Answer 4

Do it in person and tell her she's too needy. She deserves the face to face talk. Then stick to your guns because she's not going to let it die if she's the way you described her to be. Good luck.

Answer 5

first remember.... its not her job to make you happy. That is all on you. If you feel that you dont feel romantic toward her then break it off. But if's because she isent "making you happy" then that is not her fault. Dont call her, that is so tacky and low class. You at least can look her in the eye and tell her how you feel. Dont be a wuss.

Answer 6

Tell her you don't want to be with her anymore and leave it at that.

Answer 7

20 minutes?  I drove 20 minutes every night to my husband's house when we were dating.  You at least owe her a face to face conversation.    

Answer 8

You HAVE to do this in person. Please, do not call her or email her that is degrading and disrespectful, even if you don't mean it that way. Do not tell her she is needy or put blame on her. This is going to hurt her, but what you are doing is best for her too. Sometimes what is best will hurt us, so there is no way that you can do this without hurting her feelings.

Just tell her what you said here, but be warned that "I can't give you the attention you deserve" can sound more like you are blaming yourself and giving her a way to try to pull you back in. You need something more firm to add as well such as, "I'm sorry, but I just don't see a future together" or "I'm not the right man for you, but there is someone else out there for you." Give her compliments before and after, and then walk away after your goodbye. Do not contact her and don't answer phone calls or emails no matter what. It's a hard thing to do, but it really is what is best if you aren't happy.

Answer 9

talk to her face to face and tell her how you feel.  

Answer 10

If you truly aren't happy, then you must be honest with your feelings.

Please speak to her in person. Talking to her on the phone, is not appropriate. She may get hurt but, it's better to be honest, than to stay in an unhappy relationship.

Good Luck.

Answer 11

She's going to have pain over this, you can't get around that. But I do think you are doing the right thing if you honestly believe she deserves more. Why don't you try telling her exactly what you told us? I could respect that if I was on the receiving end.

Answer 12

Just email her, then you don't have to see the pain in her eyes!  You poor thing.