Im pregnant and the father don't care?

Question

i found out last night i was pregnant and the father (my ex boyfriend) refuses to care all because of his dad hating me and not letting him have anything to do with me so im left with the decision of what to do but 7 months ago i had an abortion because i thought it was best but my ex (the same guy) went mad when i told him and we fell out for ages now i can't get him to care about the fact i want to keep the baby and have him there as the father what can i do to get him to face up to the responsablilty and be a father to our child or get him to help me make the decision on what exactly to do HELP

Answer 1

Wow you must really love this guy, either that or the two of you are just so careless !!! How can you allow such a guy to make you pregnant twice, without knowing how commited he is to you?

This is not a new story...but do get some counselling on what to do with the baby, you need help that's for sure. Be brave, life goes on, and try not to make silly mistakes like this in the future.

Answer 2

well it aint a nice position to be in, knowing full well what it feels like i had to miscariages with my partner and now found out am pregnant again, which were yearning for anywy but my other half has different views things taking slippery slope downhill and am just sat wondering, but end of the day i got myself in the position and unless you protect yourself from UNwanted pregnancies you have a responsibity to basically as my father says made your bed lie on it! hope dont sound harsh but its reaity and my view is things are there to be taken to prevent these things otherwise no child asks to be born into world especially when so man people out there yearning for children, all i can say is goodluck and dont look at it like an object but a life.. and a baby also aint a sticking plaster if he dont care not alot will change that unless he has a change of heart after birth .

goodluck. x*x

Answer 3

all you can really do is pray right now. and i honestly think you need to keep this one. if you're old enough to have s*x your old enough to accept the consequences. im not saying this to upset you. im only 19 and im pregnant. as far as the so called "father" he aint a father. he just simply supplied the sperm. the only thing i can say if wait til this baby is born and get a court ordered DNA test. and when it comes back positive guess whose paying child support. then he'll have a reason to care. life sucks i know and im sorry for your situation if you wanna talk email me. i know how you feel right now. i went through it when i was 16 with my ex fiance'. but i didnt have it aborted i lost it 14 weeks in because i got into a car accident. good luck<33

Answer 4

people she had and abortion 7months ago not 2months ago, obviously she wasn't that careless. Look hun you can't make him want to participate in the kids life but you can make him financially responsible for the life he created. Just stay away from him and continue this pregnancy the one you WANT and when the baby is born go take him to court for child support.

Answer 5

Looks like you are on your own.

You will have to make your own decisions.

Get a new boyfriend

USE CONTRACEPTION

Answer 6

You had to know from the first time around what would happen without protection . The father is just an excuse . Your ex-boyfriend made things clear the first time around. It's too bad that you didn't learn from that. You can't make him love you. You can make him love or want the baby. What you can do, if you keep the baby, is make him pay for child support and that's about all you can do. Obviously he is either too young or does not want to act responsible and you are left with all the burden. If you keep you child, take him to court for child support. I wouldn't get involved with this guy ever again. I will pray that you can make it, have help from family and have support to do the most important job in the world . That job is being a good parent. Sorry but you can't make him want to be a part of a child's life. A child with one loving parent is better off than with two, in which one resents the child or doesn't love the child. Let the boyfriend go except for child support, learn your lessons and get on with your life. Someday, if you don't attract the same type of guy, things will work out and there are many men out there who would love you and love your child. It is easy for a man to get you pregnant, but it takes a man to become a father. Never think that if you get pregnant by any man that he will automatically be yours and want you both.

Answer 7

You need to stop having s*x until you are in a committed relationship (preferably a marriage!)  Abortion is NOT an acceptable method of birth control.  

Answer 8

hello, looks like you are on your own honey, things may change when the babies here, but you dont owe no one nothing but the child you are carrying, so you need to stop worrying about the father and worry about you and your un-born child.

if he cant be grown up enough about this then he's a waste of space, what ever your parents think you should not take it out on the girlfriend or baby,

the baby will be better of without a father like him take good care of yourself and the baby xxxx

Answer 9

i agree with all...

Answer 10

I'm sorry hun but there is not much that you can do about all this except hope he comes to his senses and wish that this had never happend if he does not want you and this baby don't get to upset you don't want to be really upset and pregnant it will stress you out and stress is not what you need on top of all this maybe when the baby is born the father will relize that leaving you and the baby was a big mistake and he will come back and then its up to you to decide what you want to do there good luck and i hope you make the right decision

jane x

Answer 11

I'm pregnant and alone too and I am keeping the baby. I wouldn't ever get an abortion.

Answer 12

stop having s*x and getting pregnant with kids you either abort or dont know what to do with. if he doesnt want to help then that is his chioce the only thing you can do is take him to court for visitations and child support the rest is on you for the rest of your life.

Answer 13

Looks like you may be on your own. You can still get childsupport from him. He is going to have to CARE. Good luck to you hun!

Answer 14

Point one: Condoms are not that thin use extra safe

Point two: If you are so worried about them being thin don't use them

Point three: If you can't take the pill there are other forms of contraception!

Point four: You have already had an abortion!! Learn from it!

Point Five: If you cannot have s*x safely with out creating a life DON'T have it!!!

Seriously don't blame condoms and don't blame the BFs father! The reason he may not care is because he is not ready for a kid! You should of though about all this before you had s*x.  You have created a life.  There will be nothing you can do to get the BF to care it will just happen.  You should of thought about this.

Answer 15

Haven't  you ever heard of contraception ? although in your case I think sterilisation is a better option.

Answer 16

You can't make someone want a baby!  You need to make the choice to go it alone or keep waiting for something that might never happen.  If you do keep the baby he will have to take responsability financially but you need to ask yourself will he step up to the plate to provide your child with emotional support! If not dont worry many many women out there have children and they don't have a man by their side.  Im sure you will manage and pehaps the more he sees your bump grow the more he will accept it.  Good luck x

Answer 17

His loss Tina

Answer 18

he cant help you make this decision he has obviously told you how he feels, do what you think is best. do you want your baby growing up without a father, because its harder on the child then it really seems. so try and make the best decision and think of the baby first, not just you trying to get your ex back and trying to bribe him by using the baby.....

sexy_mummy

Answer 19

If you keep the baby, then plan well for it or have the baby adopted. Contraception is not that difficult, even if you cannot take the pill. Doesn't sound like the child would be born into a pool of happiness if you and your boyfriend have such an unstable relationship. I feel sorry for your baby. Have a serious discussion with your ex and make some decisions very soon.  

Answer 20

GREAT SCOTT, GIRL!  If I were there I would shake you till your head rattled and activated your brain!!!

Face reality.  This guy is NOT "life partner" material, and you have no business getting pregnant.

If you want to have the baby and keep it, then that's your decision, but don't count on him for anything other than legally mandated child support, but I'm willing to bet he will try to say the child isn't his, and you will have to go for a court-ordered paternity test.

For the good of your child, seriously consider the adoption option.  There are hundreds, if not thousands, of stable couples out there looking for a child.

As for you, quit shortchanging yourself.  Give up the guys until you have the discernment and maturity to pick one that will be good to you and to any children you might have together.  Get educated, find yourself and become an asset to your own life.

Good luck in your future...I'll be praying for you.

Answer 21

You can't force a person to want to be there. All you can do is care for your baby and take him to court for child support...sorry...