In Germany you can't refuse invitations???

Question

I read in book about Germany's culture, that in Germany if somebody invite you over (of course if this is not s*x fiend) you can't refuse, as it will be ugly and not nice. Is that true????

Answer 1

Hi-I think there are a lot of things you can read about Germans that are simply not true.

I´m an American, and live in Germany, and I was so stressed out about being on time-I had heard that Germans are never late to anything.  Well, this is simply not true.  There are some Germans that are prompt, some that are not.

We invited a couple over for dinner a couple months ago, and they never called, never showed up, never apologized.  I think it depends on the person---like American culture, people will be like in a book, some won´t.

Answer 2

Nope, that's not true. Politeness would demand that you be gracious when refusing. But other than that, you can become a hermit for all you like and not break any rules of social conduct.

Answer 3

In any country it's considered rude to decline an invitation to somebody's home unless you can come up with a really good excuse. Germany is no exception. If you decline an invitation and you have a good excuse everybody will understand but if you just say that you don't wanna come, now that's just rude.

Answer 4

It' better if you go, but if you haven't time or desire, you can tell them very friendly. They won't be so angry

Answer 5

Hi, that book must be based on something 100 years ago. True there are some huge cultural differences over here but if you get invited and dont want to go the you just excuse yurself just like anywhere else in the world.

Answer 6

Hey, I am German and I have never heard something like that before. Of course you can decline an invitation if you don't want to go.

Answer 7

From my experience with relatives in Germany, it was considered rude or at least disappointing when I tried to reject invitations. there are no punishments to me for refusing, but it disappointed them, broke their hearts, to say the least.  They don't just casually invite everyone they meet just to sound nice, its more rare (compared to English speaking cultures), more special, and sincere.  They probably have generous or kind hospitality prepared or planned, and its more polite to accept unless its impossible.  

IF its some stranger inviting you, then even moreso you should play it safe and refuse, because they generally only invite people they know and are generally more closed and private to strangers.  

By contrast to a different culture, my cultured chinese friends taught me and demonstrated that refusing invitations at first is actually their trying to be polite, like saying you don't have to go through so much trouble, yet to our German family, it feels disappointing, almost feels like an insult, even though BOTH German and Chinese are trying to be kind and polite.

Answer 8

Refusing invitations isn't more or less rude than anywhere

else. However. If you're from the U.S. there's a twist to it.

When Germans invite you over they actually mean it and

when you say you're coming they do expect you. It's not

your typical chit chat invitation.

Answer 9

If you have a good reason to not go its not bad. But if they invite you its better if you go.

Answer 10

No this is not true. If you having invitation and something happened, you can't go there, just call and say sorry and that's OK.