In-Law baby naming problem?

Question

How can I tell my mother in law that me and my husband don't want to name (if there is a girl in here which I am hoping) the baby after her its not that we don't want to name it after her its just we have our names already picked out and she is already apart of one of the names. The names we like are Jillian Elise, Emma Grace and Alivia Charlotte. Charlotte is after my mom and Elise is after my mom in law. Grace is my aunt who passed away of Breast Cancer June '08. She said she wants to be the first name its just Elise isn't the name I want, so how can I tell her nicely but make my point...if you get what I mean.

Answer 1

Wow...it would be really hard for me to be nice about something like this! Just tell her something to the affect of "You had your child(ren) and you named them. This is our baby and we're going to name her (him). We appreciate your input, but your son and I are going to make the final decision." Also I hope you don't mind if I rate your names. I'll rate them on a scale of 1-10 (1=hate,10=love)

Jillian Elise ~ 5 (I don't really like Jillian, but Jill is a cute nickname. Elise is ok.)

Alivia Charlotte ~ 10 (I love your spelling of Alivia! And Charlotte really compliments it. They go really well together.)

Emma Grace ~ 9 (Very cute. I also like the name Emma, and my middle name picks are Emma Katherine, Emma Kherington, Emma Karol, and Emma Francis.)

Caden Thomas ~ 7 (I like Caden, but prefer the spelling Kaden. Thomas is ok.)

Matthew Joseph ~ 3 (I don't really like this combination...sorry.)

Jacob Connor ~ 4 (I don't really like Jacob, but Connor is ok.)

Owen Kevin ~ 3 (These two ending in N names don't work very well together in my opinion.)

Gavin Michael ~ 8 (Nice names.)

Sean Daniel ~ 8 (I like this pair. I prefer Sean spelled Shawn, but either way is fine.)

I wasn't really crazy about any of your boy combinations, so I switched them around and found a few combinations I think sound nice:

Connor Michael

Daniel Joseph

Gavin Daniel

Caden Matthew

My favorite GIRLS name from your list: Alivia Charlotte.

My favorite BOYS name from your list:Gavin Michael.

Good luck and congrats to you and your husband on the baby! I hope everything goes well and works out for you :o)

EDIT: It sounds like your having multiples?! How many? :o)

Answer 2

All you can do is politely state your decision.  You are not obliged to explain.  Her reaction is HER issue.  Don't allow her to impose her invalid disappointment on you.

Answer 3

explain it to her just like that. explain to her that i am carrying this infant for 9 months and i have  say in what the name is going to be you can be mad or happy either or you are set on the names you like. ihad to sit and explain that to my MIL with my previous two pregnancies and this pregnancy as well she comes up withthe ugliest craziest names and shehas learned that i will be blunt and honest with her.

HOLY COW TRIPLETS CONGRATS

Answer 4

Maybe it would be best to avoid the names of your mom and mother in law . Jillian Grace is a lovely name and no one would be offended.

Answer 5

you can't really tell her nicely...when she asks and you respond with those names and she says something about it just tell her you and your husband agreed on the name and to be thankful you even thought of her...I wouldn't name my daughter after my MIL...sorry, I guess I'm just THAT mean! LoL! It'll all work out to your liking, your the one carrying the baby!!

Answer 6

You don't have to tell her anything.  This is YOUR baby.  If she prods you just gently point out that the decision is one you and your husband are making together and you are not giving her the first name of either her nor YOUR mother because to do so would be unfair.

Oh and I LOVE all your names!!!!

By the way, did she name her kids after her folks or in-laws?????

Answer 7

She already named her children. She should have no say in naming yours.  The fact that you are considering her name is thoughtful of you, but go with what you like so you don't regret your choice down the road.  Good luck!

Answer 8

It's your hubby's mom, he should handle it...i hope he's not putting it off on you...he needs to let her know that while you both love and cherish her that the naming will be done by the parents (him and you...end of discussion...

Answer 9

you should not have to tell her that.  It is your baby and your choice

Answer 10

I think you should tell her what you wrote that you have both decided on the names you will have and thats that basically.

She has had her children and had her chance to name them now as parents its up to you and hubby to name your children whatever you want to.

It seems a bit rude of mother in law to want a girl to be named after her not to mention conceited..she should just be pleased you would be willing to give your daughter the middle name.

Your a nicer person than me- my mother and mother in laws name didnt egt a look in not even for a middle name

Goodluck with it :-)

Answer 11

Sextuplets?  I just can't fathom how someone can handle and afford that.  Name them what YOU want, you guys will be the ones waking up every 3-5 minutes with 6 newborns...unless your mother-in-law wants to take care of that business every night

Good luck and God bless.

Answer 12

just explain why politely. It's your baby so if you are clear and polite then its her problem after that if she doesn't like it. She's lucky to get the middle name and pretty greedy to expect and ask for more than that. its an honor not an obligation and its not her decision to make. I really don't see why an explanation is necessary to tell you the truth, you are a more considerate person than I.

Answer 13

Go with the name you and your husband want, its your baby and there should not have to be any explaining.    

Answer 14

All you gotta do is tell her this is not your baby its not your place to name her. Tell her we will gladly accept and consider your opinions, but in now way are we going to 100% agree to a name you think you want.  

Answer 15

This decision is up to you and your husband and honestly, it is slightly rude for your mother-in-law to request that the baby be named after her.  Be polite, but stand firm.  Your mother-in-law will get over it, but if you give in you may always regret not standing your ground.  

Answer 16

Just like what you said.  You already have names picked out and those are the ones you want.

Answer 17

I think it's awfully presumptuous of her to ask you to give your baby the same name as her.  If I were in your position, I wouldn't be worrying about being nice, because that just sounds really selfish and ridiculous.  Of course, it may not actually be that way, but I can't imagine requesting that a baby be named after me at all, much less as forcefully as she seems to be.