In light of the recent political unrest and controversy from China, should I consider adopting Chinese child?

Question

I submitted my dossier of paperwork to China in June of 2006. I still have quite a bit of time to wait for a referral, but have gone through my "ups & downs" with adoption and especially the prospect of possibly having to explain certain attitudes or political happenings to a child.

I do not agree with China's politics at all. I find myself at odds with supporting a system that denies their own people basic human rights and will not allow others (Tibetans) their freedom. I do not wish to convey anything negative to my adopted child about her homeland, but these things upset and anger me. I am passionate about humand and animal rights

and China is a top offender in these areas.

I find myself making statements in casual conversation like, "China is really messed up - their govenment doesn't care about their people". I wonder how I can adopt from a country (and pay the government adoption fees) whose government I disdain.

Answer 1

Then adopt a child and get her out of there!  It's not like it's the kids part.   Sorry but I don't see the connection!

Answer 2

Wow, that's a tough one...it's her heritage you're dissing.  Not that I disagree at all.  But I understand.  That's got to be a difficult position to be in.  I wonder if there are others who have adopted from China, but have negative views of their government, and how they've dealt with it.  Sorry I couldn't be more help.  I just wanted to say that I see where you're coming from.  Good luck!

Answer 3

In the end the only person who will suffer is the child so even though you feel the way you do about china I would still adopt a child. Besides if more people felt that way imagine how many innocent children will be left behind

Answer 4

The reason I woudl not adopt from China at this time are that there are more adoptive parents than children due to popularity in that country.

Answer 5

This seems to me more like a clash between your beliefs about China and your desire to 'save'  a Chinese child.

There are many other places with children needing care, even your own country.

Answer 6

Looks like you'll benefit from their 'one child' policy, however.  So her parents misfortune is your benefit, isnt that wonderful? (sarcasm)

This does not sound like a good idea for you. Why not go get a child from foster care?

Answer 7

It's a matter of separating the country's policies from your child.  Your child is not China.  If anything, your child is a victim of the governmental policies of China.  

However, it's normal for children adopted from overseas to have a connection and a loyalty to that country, even if they are adopted as infants.  

I would suggest that you be careful about badmouthing China, as the next step in a child's logic would be that if China is bad, and I came from China, then I am bad.  Of course I'm not suggesting that you would be telling her this, but that's a child's thinking and reasoning.  

I'd also suggest using this time to research the positive contributions and things about the Chinese people and culture.  Seek out a Chinese cultural center.

Answer 8

Sounds like you are more interested in making a political statement than becoming a parent.  You're considering NOT adopting a child from China because China sometimes exports inferior products (toys with lead paint)?  

You're supposedly adopting a CHILD - not a COUNTRY nor a GOVERNMENT, nor a POLITICAL POSITION.  "Adoption actually fits in well with my politics."  ????  Are you serious?  

You write, "I am also not looking to "save" anyone", then contradict that statement with your next sentence..."I would like to adopt a child who needs a home."  That's a saver's mentality, my dear.  I know...I lived it...

How on earth are you "supporting a system" by adopting a child?  And your child's HOMELAND, depending on her age, will be the one she grows up in!  I am 1/2 Dutch, and I can tell  you that my "homeland" is America.  My ancestor's home land was in the Netherlands.  China is her birthplace.  It will be her heritage.  But she won't learn many of the traditions of her heritage because she will be growing up in the US in a non-Chinese household.  Just as I grew up without Dutch traditions - my (adopted) parents weren't Dutch, nor did they know I was Dutch.  

And I'm sorry to tell you this, but unless you've LIVED for a long period of time in CHINA, you probably know very little about the intricacies of their complex culture, traditions, unspoken language, etc.  It's not just about the holidays or the food!  If it were, I'd be GREEK.  (opa!)  

And if you DID know more about Chinese culture, you might not be so harsh on their politics.  With a little knowledge, you just might UNDERSTAND a bit about the Chinese perspective, differing values, social problems, etc.

As for adopting from foster care, as someone else suggested, it is not as difficult a task as you suggest. There are more than 100,000 kids in foster care available for adoption (meaning parental rights have already been terminated).  Many are age 5 & under.   You've waited 2 years for a child from China. It doesn't take that long to adopt a child in foster care.  

But really, you sound more interested in the politics than in the children.  

Good luck   (to that child...)

ETA: When she figures out that she's actually a political statement for her mommy (and she WILL figure that out), she probably will be less concerned with the horrible things you have to say about China, anyway.