In love with my ex-girlfriend still, what do I do next?

Question

Can female help with this one...?

About a month ago I posted this:

"After 4 years with the same gal and living in SD, I took a job in a different city so that I could have better opportunity and I could ask my gf to marry me. We've had rocky times in 2007 but we still were seeing each other. Well when this new year came, she was apprehensive about the move and told me that she wanted to see other people. I tried to hang on to wait and gave her some space but every time she went out with someone else it just killed me inside. I also felt that she was playing me for some time. Point is this, I worked really hard for this relationship and I didn't want to let go, she obviously had problems deciding what she wanted (she wanted me as a security net in case her other endeavors didn't work out). Well after 2 months of enduring this c**p, and her sleeping around with another guys she tried playing me on a day she had no one to hang out with...It infuriated me so much I didn't want to handle it anymore so I emailed her new guy friend (she been sleeping with) and bad mouthed her-informing him of her actions and cheating lying ways. Now I regret doing it and I still missed her and want her back...Obviously, she no longer talks to me.......!" She is now dating this guy...I tried keeping my distance and for about 2-3 weeks I have tried calling her ttalkingto her but with little avail. WHn I dont call her she almosta always texts me and occasionally calls me and the latest that happen was this text,

"As much as I want to hate you and 4get you, I jaz want to say hi".

I still love her and want her back what do I do and how do I handle this situation? I know she is seeing someone else, and it hurts when she asks me questions about going to places where we use to go.

Help...

Answer 1

you made yourself seem like a hater...why would you bad mouth her and still try to be with her? that's probably how the other guy is looking at it.. anyway if you see that she is just using you and wants to be with other people why are you wasting your time? let her do what she wants. and if it's meant to be for you two then it will happen. but until then you really need to move on. think about it after what you did why would she still be talking to you, she wants to keep it cool between you two so if it doesn't work out she can come back to you!!

Answer 2

Overall your question is, what do you do next? You should just tell her one last time exactly how you feel about her, and if possible make it face to face so that she knows you really mean it. Just tell you love her, you've always wanted to be with her and settle down with her but if she doesn't think you're the one then you two need to go your separate ways because in the long run it will just be better for you. The fact that even after you messaged her guy-friend she texted you shows she does care for you, and wants to see how you're doing. This girl cares about you but she's just not ready to settle down yet like you are. There's nothing wrong with that, and you can't really blame her for that. As for cheating on you, there is no excuse even for a girl to be doing that it is just as bad if not worse than a guy cheating. I think you need to realize maybe she's just not the one for you, give it one last shot and tell her exactly how you feel in person and tell her you want to be with her aside from all of the things that have gone wrong between you two. If she really does love you too, she'll tell you and you two can work on trying to build a better future but if not then it's for the best. Everything does happen for a reason, and it just means theres another girl out there who wants to give you all of her love and treat you with respect. As for your rude messages you left her guy friend, that was wrong. I'm sorry. But other than that, I give you a lot of credit being able to know a girl cheated on you and truely loving her and sticking by her side that just shows how much you care and there aren't many guys like you. I wish you the best.