In need of some wedding planning advice...?

Question

...So my fiance and I have been engaged for about a year and a half now, with our wedding taking place next summer (2009). We wanted a long engagement so we could both finish school, but after all of this time, I'm totally losing motivation in planning. It's like I've had so much time to think about it I'm TOTALLY burnt out, and now is the time I need to start really finalizing things! It's gotten to the point where I'm like, who cares if we even get married?! How can I get inspired again? It's making me so sad that I have lost a lot of heart with the whole process, because I love my fiance so much but just don't know how to put my ideas into action...and don't feel like expending the energy :( Any advice is sooooo appreciated.

Answer 1

Buy a few wedding magazines and start searching online for a wedding dress and you'll start to feel motivated again. I was the same way but once I started searching for dresses I was in full wedding mode

~MLF~

Answer 2

maybe if just the two of you went on some sort of romantic weekend vacation together it would rekindle all the reasons you want to marry your fiance. remembering the reasons you want to marry him may inspire you to really start planning again. good luck!  

Answer 3

Have a weekend with your fiance where it's just the two of you. No wedding talk and no school talk. Go out for a picnic, talk about the future. memories, etc. Go to a beach and relax.

It sounds like you're just stressed from school and your brain needs a break. I know there are  times when my fiance and I just wanted to say, "s***w it, let just go to Vegas and elope!" But then there are days when all I want to do is plan. It's totally normal to feel this way, and I'm sure after a romantic weekend with your fiance, you'll be more enthusiastic.

Give it a week or so, then maybe buy a magazine or two to get inspired (they really do help with ideas). I'm not sure how much you've done fo far, but it really helped me to make an "inspiration board" that my fiance and I did together. We got a piece of foam board from the drugstore, and pined up things that we knew we wanted at our wedding, and reflected our style. It's helped keep us on track, plus it was fun to do together. We have color swatches of the bridesmaid's dresses, suit ideas for him, a picture of my dress and the venues, our photographer (sample images that made us choose her), etc.

I hope that helps! Don't worry, you'll get back on track when you've started to wind down.

Answer 4

You'll get into the feeling again if you truly love him.But dont think about it until you finish school.

Answer 5

Don't feel bad- maybe during the course of the wedding planning process, you've just discovered that you're not really the type of girl who wants a big wedding.  Planning a wedding, small or large, can be terribly overwhelming, since you want to do the right thing and make both families happy with whatever you choose, but maybe during the course of all this planning time, you've gotten turned off by the idea of a large celebration.  To me, it sounds like you're a level-headed young woman who cares more about the marriage itself than the wedding, and I think that's good.  I think you should jump-start your excitement about getting married by exploring alternative options, like a destination wedding, where you jet off somewhere fabulous and practically elope in front of only a handful of your closest friends and relatives.  No muss, no fuss, lovely memories.  Or maybe you just want to say %$#@ it, and go get married at the courthouse, with a chill little backyard BBQ reception afterwards.  I know I'd be less than thrilled with the prospect of my wedding if I thought I had to plan some big, fancy, elaborate affair that has nothing to do with who my fiance and I are as people, so we're keeping it simple, informal, and low-key while still having a fun, meaningful celebration.  Lucky for us, our families understand and support us, and I hope your situation is the same.  Luck!!

Answer 6

I know how you are feeling, I was engaged for FIVE years. Once we stated really planing I got excited. We booked the venue and it is like hey we are really doing this. It made me want to get the invites, so I did. Then we went dress shopping and that was when I got even more excited. My favorite part of planning my wedding was picking out my cake, and after we did that the time could not move fast enough. I got really excited and was telling everyone about my amazingly beautiful cake (we got a lot of complements about that cake). I think it takes one big item to get you back in that excitement of planning your wedding. For some it may be the dress or the Venue but for me it was that cake!

Answer 7

Do you have anyone who is helping you plan the wedding? If you can afford it you could always hire a wedding planner. Maybe they can help you get started and get back some of that motivation.

Maybe you could start by giving yourself just one thing to do everyday. Just make it a goal to accomplish one thing off of your list. Then it might not seem so overwhelming.

Have you purchased your dress yet? I know I was really stressed out throughout my wedding planning (not so much because of the wedding, but because of some other family issues) and one thing that kept me going was imagining myself being able to wear that beautiful dress. I know it's sounds corny, but when I would picture myself walking down the aisle and having my husband see me for the first time in my gown it really made me feel like everything was worth it.

Don't worry - you might just be going through a slump right now. I know it's hard because it feels like everything has to get done right now - but you still have some time.

Good luck to you!  

Answer 8

First of all, take a deep breath and breathe! You're fine, getting frustrated with the whole planning process doesn't mean that you don't love your Fiance or that you don't want to get married, it just means that your tired and ready to get it over with! With the wedding being next summer you have plenty of time to finalize. There's no rush at all! The only things you need to really decide on is a date and where you're going to have it so you can be sure it's available. Take a break from planning, walk away, take a mini-vacation and relax. Then when you don't feel quite so ready to throw your hands up and elope, get a list together of what you still need, grab your fiance, and spend a day driving to different craft malls and bridal stores. Look around and get some ideas, then end the day with dinner and a movie. Don't get stressed, don't let anyone stress you out, and try to enjoy yourself. You sound like a very responsible, capable person and I'm sure you can handle this. Good luck!

Answer 9

I kind of know the feeling.  We had a pretty long engagement and even after getting a few things done I sort of burnt out on it all.  One way to get your wedding planning fires going again would be to rekindle how you are feeling!  I think a weekend vacation with your fiance is in order.  Also, if he hasn't been involved, talk to him about the wedding.  I am sure he is excited and getting your honey excited/involved kind of gave me a boost.  (if your fiance is crazy involved like mine was, I had to keep up with him so that helped!)  Pick your favorite part of wedding planning (be it cake testing, flowers, etc.) and go do that first to get you started.  Book appointments.  Having a plan in order so you can see where this is all taking you can make the task not seem quite as daunting.  Best of luck and I hope things get a bit easier!

Answer 10

My advice? Take a month off. Seriously. No planning, no talking about planning, no THINKING about planning for a whole month. Truly. If it stops being fun, then you need to step back and breathe. You are still ahead of the game. don't worry. Take a break, and go have some really fun dates with your fiance, and just be in love. And then, level with your guy, about how you are a bit overwhelmed with wedding planning, and ask him to take on a few more details-I bet he won't mind at all. Also, utilize your bridal party. I bet your girlfriends would be more than happy to help do things to take some stuff off your plate. Whenever I got a little overwhelmed, my husband and I went out for a good time, and that energized me: it reminded me that I wanted to marry this man, and so it jumpstarted my eagerness to dive back into planning.