Injured Wife and Mother in law driving me nuts?

Question

My wife and mother in law are driving me nuts. About 3 weeks ago my wife had a knee operation making it difficult for her to get around let alone to any chores. I work two jobs. I have a professional carrier and a business I am trying to get get off the ground. So needless to say I have my hands full. My mother in law says she is coming over to help my wife, but what that means is they go out shopping and dining. My mother in law pushes my wife around in a wheel chair and my wife is still in pain and just wants to rest at home. So when I get home I am expected to vacuum the house, wash the dishes, cook a dinner, do the laundry, pay the bills, iron the cloths. My wife takes after my father in law. She is a cleaning fanatic. Once something is dirty it HAS to be cleaned or the world will end.

Am I crazy to think that my mother in law should help my wife by cleaning up the house while I am working? Isn't doing the things you can't do the definition of "helping out". Help me out here!

Answer 1

Your MIL is probably just trying to give your wife some TLC...special treatment to make her feel good during a time when it is easy to get down and depressed. Try to see it this way and if you can, you can feel happy for your wife that she is getting the royal treatment.

Maybe you could talk to your MIL and ask her if she can give you a hand. Have specific things in mind, like say "would you be a darling and fold that laundry for us today - it would be such a big help!" She may come onboard.

If not then you need to make sure that you take time to rest. Some things might have to wait, so prioritize. Surely your wife can see how hard you are working, so let her know that not everything will be done on time and perfectly for a while. You might even suggest that she ask her mom for some housework help - it is probably best if she asks.

I hope it works out for you - all the best! You are a good man to do all these things and I am sure you are appreciated.