International and Local Adoption?

Question

Seeking Adoption Advice, stories, thoughts? I'd like to adopt the most popular children in the world 2-4 year old white girl that looks like me and my wife. Cost seems to run 30k and up where can I find donation money for such a venture? My wife wants some body who looks like us but I kinda think it would be fun to have an international family made up of international children ... like the Pitts family. I should be able to pick from a list of charachteristics, date of birth, parents shoe size for 30k plus. That's a lot of money for me like a years salary. Is it worth it? I think it would be, but could I achieve as much joy in life by simply becoming a member of a big brother program or working with kids at the YMCA? What are your thoughts and opinions please.

Answer 1

A child will bring you great joy reguardless of looks, gender, or age. If a child is what you truely want and you have exhausted all other options, the only thing you can do is start saving up the funds. A foreign child will bring just as much love and joy to your life.

Answer 2

Prepare yourself for a long wait.  A private adoption couldn't ensure you would get that perfect child you are looking for any sooner than adoption through the county.  The county does their best to match child to parent in looks, nationality, etc.  And if you are specific about what you want they will eventually find it for you, but it could take years.  And the county is free.  I read earlier today that international adoptions are running from 20K to 40K.  The Pitts may seem cool, but there are so many children in foster care in this country that need good parents that you should give one of our own your first consideration.

Just from your question I think you should try being a big brother or mentor prior to looking into adoption.  It is a huge responsibility and fraught with difficulties and then it is a lifetime commitment.  It has been one of the most difficult and without a doubt the most rewarding experience of my life.  Good luck to you.

Answer 3

My thoughts -- you're a silly troll asking questions to bait people.

If you are serious about adoption go to www.informedadoptions.com

Answer 4

If you want to be that specific about a child you would adopt, I respectfully submit that you are not ready to adopt.  Given your specifications, any child but your own natural child will most likely disappoint.  And, in turn, that child would be terribly disappointed as well.

To be ready to adopt, you need to become comfortable in a mindset that would allow you to love and accept ANY child unconditionally - it is what adopted children desperately need.  It is not any child's job to comply with your specifications.

I think you have a great idea to work with kids through a big brother program or something similar.  It is tremendously rewarding if you take to it.  Either way, it will give you a much better idea of how non-biological children might or might not fit in your life.

Answer 5

Hello again Mr. Enigma,

My, you sure do ask questions in a lot of areas. I'm with C P on this one -- I think you are just trying to stir the pot and generate controversy. Given that you are apparently not yet settled in a career (witness you questions on an area of study and financial aid), I don't think you are ready to be an adoptive parent. And your question definitely confirms that. Adoptive parenting is a lot more than just ordering up a child. No child should be placed in a home like that. Children waiting for adoption deserve parents who will love them for themselves -- not make a list of the qualities they want.

If I thought you were serious, I'd be a lot harsher here, but from your other questions I don't think you are.

You have a good idea in suggesting that you might start off being a Big Brother. But be sure that is something you will stick with as well. I have a Little Sister and she had her heart broken by someone that signed up and only stuck with it a couple of months. Volunteering working with groups of kids at the YMCA might be the best choice until you get a little more settled.

Answer 6

Um, adoption is not like shopping.  I understand the need everyone has to have someone "look like them" but my equation is simple:

There are children who need homes and there are parents who desire children.  These two should meet and the competition for "white children" should be finished.  

And to adopt internationally because it would be "kinda fun", well maybe put more thought into it.

As for fundraising for adopting a white kids, well see my second comment about competition.

Answer 7

I can't even begin to tell you how shocked I am by your question, it's like you are shopping

I recommend the big brother program and would like to suggest you stop and think about how you are speaking about adoptees