Is 19 too young to marry?

Question

I'm looking for an honest, sincere, and serious answer here. So, back to the question: is 19-years-old too young to marry?

Please answer the best you can! I'm in need of a third-person's insight.

Answer 1

I would say yes that is is too young to marry but thats just for me. I personally want to wait longer before I get married but on the other hand my parents got married when they were 17 and they just had their 23rd anniversary in July. They are still very happy but every relationship is different :) Good Luck!!!

Answer 2

No. However, you're still going to need to figure out if you and your man are actually ready to get married. Just because you're old enough doesn't mean you should.

Answer 3

Some answers aggravate me. You are ready when you are ready. I will be 20 in 2 weeks, and I have been living on my own for 2 years. My fiancee works and supports us, and I am in nursing school, I try to work at least a few hours a week to bring in a little extra. We know what it is to be on our own, we have the same problems as anyone else, and they are not lessened because we weren't born 5 years earlier. We have been together for 4 years and are getting married next year. So guess what? Some people do marry their high school sweetheart, and some people do marry at 20, and some people do make it. I know it isn't common, but I love that man with every inch of my body, even when we fight and I just want to scream at the top of my lungs or run out the house, I never would.. because I cannot imagine my life without him in it. I do not care at all what else is out there, I have my soulmate and we will only be seperated at death. And honestly, we have probably had it harder, considering we live in new orleans, where katrina hit.. but ultimately it is to each their own. Some people/most people aren't ready to marry at 19. But some are..

Answer 4

it really depends on you and your relationship.. I am with the same man I was with at 18 and I am 30 now.. we moved in together when I was 19 I don't think getting married then would have been any different than getting married when we did other than money.  We love eachother just as much now as we did then  

Answer 5

For me, it would have been too young. I think for most people, its too young. However there may be a few select cases where 19yr olds are ready for marriage.

Personally, I see no reason to rush. If you are 19, you probably just graduated from high school and need to get your higher education before you get married and become a completely independent being.

Answer 6

If you guys are both going to college and know you wont be struggling in life for the degree you go for,than I think its okay to get married.Many people get married at that age,but ofcourse,get your own place first.Cause in-laws can be real pains at times.

Answer 7

Yes, I believe it is too young.  Sometimes people can make it work, but, in general, it is not a good idea.  You will change SO MUCH in the next 5-10 years, you have no idea.  Your goals will change, your opinions will change, everything.  Try being on your own, having your own job, supporting yourself, finishing your education, and still dating this guy.  There is no hurry, get yourself established and let you mind wrap around adulthood before you jump into a marriage.

Answer 8

Yes!  Dont do it, marriage is a prison waiting for you.  Not because you cant have s*x with anyone else, that is no big deal, but you have to give give give til you cant give anymore.  Wait until your 30's, go have a life.

Answer 9

  Yes.  I got married at 19 the first time around.  Notice I said first time.  It was an utter disater.  The only good thing that came out of that marriage was my oldest daughter.  I think you should be at least 21 to get married.

Answer 10

seriously, it depends on the 19 year old.  

I certainly wasn't ready to marry at 19, but I have had 2 cousins (one is my age, the other is 12 years younger) who each got married at 19 and they are still married.  The one who is my age has children in college and has been married 24 years.  The one who is 12 years younger has been married for 12 years (no kids).

I also have a friend from college who got married at 19.  She and her husband are still married 24 years later.

meanwhile my 1/2 sister got married at 19 and was divorced in 6 years.

the main thing, regardless of your age:

1.  you both have to have a realistic idea of married life and understand that you are each other's family now.  Your family of origin is now your extended family.  This means your first loyalty is to your spouse and any children you create or otherwise aquire, NOT your parents or siblings.

2.  your core values are the same or similar.  If your core values are vastly different then the marriage will not last.  Doesn't matter how much you love each other--dissimilar core values and the stress those differences create will destroy that love.

3.  you have similar or compatible life plans/goals.  When you have a life plan that you can travel together or at least along side each other then you have a better chance of  staying together long term.  If your life goals take you in opposite directions or keep you apart then you risk growing apart and then the marriage fails.  If you have no life goals then you have no business getting married.

4.  you MUST be flexible and willing to compromise.  BUT that doesn't mean one person is always giving in to the other.  Compromise means each of you gives and takes as needed.

5.  Love is NOT enough.  You MUST have respect as well.  (for yourself and for each other)  

6.  I recommend premarital counseling or some kind of marriage class for you and your fiance before you get married.  That is the ONE thing that my cousins and friend had in common and the one thing my sister did not do before they got married.  The ones who went to the counseling/classes said that it really gave them the tools they needed to communicate well and it really impressed on them the importance of them being united as a unit and helped them to not feel like a "bad child" when they told their parents  "no"  because they had something already planned with their spouse.

Answer 11

yes.  Just wait a few more years if this is for you.  I got married when I was 20...just a few months away from 21 and its hard.  I  told myself and everyone I was ready...and I thought I was but after I did it, I wanted to be a little more "free" and not worry about someone else 24/7.  I think the whole "housewife" stuff kicked in too.  Even though I work, many traditional folks still think the woman does everything in the house too, and that frustrated me and make me realized I wasn't ready to keep up with another person.  Like making dinner and having to ask if thats what he wants, double the laundry and cleaning and just dealing with "stuff" that isn't yours.  Just give it time and enjoy yourself.  I wouldn't change my decision for the world but I would have waited a little longer.  I love my husband and I love being married but it would have been easier on both of us if we were a little older and more experienced/mature about it all.  Good luck!  Im not saying it can't be done, but work your way to marriage.  Dont jump off that bridge yet!

Answer 12

Yes, 19 is too young to wed.  At age 19, one should be in college . . . and preparing for a career.  After one gets the college degree (at approximately age 22), then one can consider getting engaged.

The engagement will probably last 12 to 18 months.  Which means the person would actually marry at age 23 or age 24.  

That is the very earliest you should consider marriage . . . IMHO.

  

Answer 13

It depends on the 19 year old, but in most cases I would say that you're just inviting trouble through your door. Most people aren't the same person even at 22 that they were at 19, can your relationship handle it if you both change? The #1 stress-er in relationships is money, and last time I checked most 19 year olds don't have a lot of it to spare, is this an additional PITA you're willing to take on?  

That all said, just because you don't marry doesn't mean you haven't found and won't be with your partner for life. My boyfriend and I started dating when we were 18 and now we're both 26 and getting married next year.  

Answer 14

Ya think? Of course it is.  It is even too young to get engaged.  I would never want to get married that young.  You haven't even lived yet.  If you got married that young you would most likely divorce down the road.  You aren't mature enough to handle married life at that age.  Also you haven't gone to college and started a career.  So how would you handle it financially? I have a handicapped child whom I love very much but it has been very exhausting and expensive.  Could you handle having a child like that so young? You are more likely to cheat on your spouse if you get married that young.  You will fill like you have missed out if you settle down that young.  

Answer 15

Yes, its to young to get married.  You haven't even made it to the age where you can go to the bar or club.  If you get married at 19 your friends will move on you will regret not doing all the things you ever wanted.  Then eventually you will get a divorce because you where to young and never experienced life.

Answer 16

Yes. In your grandmother's generation and those before, it was normal. But in today's complicated society, getting married that early is inviting problems that are unnecessary. Besides, a 19-year-old doesn't have the maturity to deal with many issues that have to be faced today. They are at a distinct disadvantage financially, emotionally, and intellectually because they haven't given themselves time to "grow up" and get an education. It's worth the wait!

Answer 17

I got married at age 19 and 3 and a half years down the line I was signing divorce papers.  OF course not everyone is the same and I am sure there are people out there who married at 19 or younger and are still happy, for me though, from personal experience I would say wait.

Answer 18

Yes!... in my opinion it is too young to get married...

Answer 19

Much depends on the person! I was 19 when I married (I'm in my late 20's now) and I will say it has been difficult. Marriage is not easy to start with, but at 19 you really are not the person you will be... meaning you will still be changing a ton over the next few years and you'd hate to change and grow apart from your spouse! That can only end badly. I do not believe in divorce due to my biblical beliefs, so I am still married and struggling to make th best of it.

Most of our issues are because of my age and perspective and because I have grown into who I am over the last few years and that doesn't really match him.

You still have too much growing to do! Wait it out and see where you are in your life and mentality in a few years!

Answer 20

Yes, at 19 a person has barely graduated high school.  Think of how young and immature high school students are...19 is not much past that.

Answer 21

Let me start by saying this. It varies for every person. Personally, looking back, if I had gotten married at 19 or even 22 (which I desperately wanted to) it would have been a disaster. I'm 30 now and will get married in December. I can see now how better prepared I am for the life-long commitment of marriage. When I was young I wasn't mature enough to know how to put in the kind of work marriage takes and I probably would have been divorced within five years.  

Answer 22

IT DEPENDS ON THE 19 YEAR OLD.

IF YOU TRULY LOVE THE PERSON

AND CAN SEE YOU A HIM TOGETHER

FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE AND IS

READY TO BE COMMITTED TO EVERYTHING

MARRIED COUPLES ARE. YOU WILL HAVE

ROUGH TIMES. EVERY MARRIED COUPLE DOES

YOUR GOING TO HAVE TO WORK HARD AT

IT. I GOT MARRIED AT 18 AND WOULDN'T CHANGE IT.

Answer 23

No. 19 Is Not Too Young.

I Am Also 19 & I Asked This Same Question A Few Months Ago & Most People Said No Also, But It Seems Like All Of A Sudden Everyone Has Something Negative To Say.

If The Government Didn't Want People To Marry This Young, They Wouldn't Have Made It Legal To Marry At 18.

A Lot Of People Tend To Forget That.

=)