Is Beirut safe these days?

Question

After a lengthy consultation period with Hizbollah I have agreed to open a small gift shop and pizza restaurant in West Beirut. Apparently there is huge demand for American Hot so I have copied the Pizza Express recipe and hope to soon be swamped with Sunnis' and s**+ gunmen fighting to get their hand on one of my 12" specials. Alcohol will not be on the menu as these guys have a war to fight and need a clear head for sniping duty. What I will need are waitresses and delivery people so please forward your CV's to me at one of the many escape routes.

Answer 1

hmmm, I'm sure it's funny. but I can't see the funiness.

maybe your humour is so subtle and refined it's beyond me.

Answer 2

just got off the phone with my brother who just arrived at Beirut airport a few hours ago. He had no problem travelling through the city to get to the villiage where he is staying.

Answer 3

it is safe, don't worry & good luck in your business. By the way, if you want for people to apply, then put an address or something, maybe someone would be interrested and would like to apply through yahoo.

Answer 4

Beirut is safer than London these days.

Answer 5

Yes Beirut is safe these days, thanks for asking.

Answer 6

I would like to apply for this job. I am a right-wing American male (aged 34). I like drinking beer and watching "America's Next Top Model" I have many extra-marital affairs and I like to eat junk food and support the US economy by purchasing American-branded clothing such as Nike and Reebok. I dislike people from other countries and I don't see the point in foreign languages or currencies; what's wrong with American English and American Dollars? Using anything else just doesn't make sense. So I'm sure I'll have no problem adjusting to living in Beirut.

More about me: I have a history of mental illness and have been in prison three times for assault and battery, aggravated assault and public exposure.

I like to spy on women breastfeeding children in public, I enjoy pretending to be a young boy on chatrooms online. I am interested in all forms of pornography, especially anything with "barely" and "scat" in the title.

I don't have an employment history as such, but I know you'll be so wowed by my personality that you will want to hire me.

Also I know smack is readily available in Beirut, which is great for I love smack.

Answer 7

lets put it this way I've booked a surprise fortnights holiday for my wife in Beirut does that answer your question