Is breaking up the right thing to do? I'm afraid I will keep doubting if we stay together.?

Question

i recently broke off my engagement to my boyfriend of 2.5 yrs. due to issues with alcohol, honesty, communication and connection. Since I moved out as well, he has been making the point to share how he is making changes for the better and asking if I am proud of him. I want him to make the effort for himself not just because of me. I love him very much and want to be with him, but I keep doubting the what ifs of things going back to the way they were. I know that he loves me very much and really wants to try. I am SO confused right now and am very torn.

Answer 1

um its nice to have opinions from people  everything, but i wouldnt take advice from random strangers... (even tho im one of em)

anyway good luck

Answer 2

boyfriend of 2.5 yrs..well..since he is really making changes in his life for the better...and being that we all deserve a 2nd chance...and because after all you still love him...I would advise you to go ahead and give him

a 2nd chance at working things out...now if..after this chance ..he goes back to old ways...definitely...leave him...then and move on.

Answer 3

I assume you meant that he has an alcohol problem? as well as he lies to you about it? or about other things? Both of those could improve if he was in counseling. & if he gets in counseling of some sort and stays in it, it could help guarantee that he is going to keep working towards improving those things? i mean, not a TOTALLY guarantee,but it might put you at east a bit more.

also i would just talk with him about how you are glad that he is making improvements but you feel that they need to be improvements he is making because he understands why you aren't okay with them and that he also feels they need to change.

also talk to him about how you are afraid that he is just going to do this for a short amount of time and then will go back to his old ways once he has you back. be sure to explain that if that happens you will be forced to leave again?

maybe that will scare him enough to make sure the changes are permanent?  

Answer 4

well...if he says he will change...then i think you should support him...

maybe your relationship will turn out good in the end, maybe it wont, but you never know if you dont risk it, just make sure that he is doing the changes....=]

goodluck...=]