Is having family cook for the wedding reception tacky?

Question

My fiance wants his family to cook for the reception to save money. Is that tacky? We both have huge families and our reception is going to be for 250 people. We are trying to keep costs down... Help!

Answer 1

The thing about weddings is, there's almost no such thing as "tacky" anymore. As long as thought goes into it, and it is both what YOU want for your wedding, and something the guests appreciate/enjoy, it doesn't really matter what you do. If your fiance's family wants to cook, let them! Just make sure the reception venue allows outside food, or non-employees use of kitchen facilities. If you want to keep costs down, you could do what we did: instead of a huge 12 course meal, we served hors d'oeuvres and gourmet wraps, and had a bottle of champagne on each table.

It was a cash bar, which some people will gripe about, but unless you're raking in big bucks, people will understand.

Answer 2

It's not tacky at all, especially if price is an obstacle.  The cost to have something catered can get out of control.  As long as you have an idea of what you would like to have on the menu and what his family is comfortable with cooking it shouldn't be a problem at all.  

Answer 3

Not in the least. It will be a lot of work but it's totally respectable.  

Answer 4

I went to a wedding that had food prepared by the groom's family and it was so delicious I still recall it as one of the best meals I've ever had! Totally appropriate, but should be really good food- family favorites maybe.

Answer 5

That's a big request for the family.  It takes a lot of food to provide for 250 people, and then it needs to be served.  His family will be too busy to enjoy most of the reception.  Make sure they are aware of the commitment of time and energy before you let them do this, and make sure they are doing it by choice, not out of a sense of obligation.

It's not tacky to provide homecooked meals at a reception.  It would be rude to request any guest to "work" the event, but it's okay to accept the offer from family.

There are better ways to save money - like cutting down the guest list.

Answer 6

Traditional among many peoples.

Nothing wrong with that at all. But it is a big job.

Answer 7

this is not only acceptable in other countries....its standard! only americans are so spoiled that they will finance a dream wedding they cant afford! stay within your budget and stop worrying what others will think of YOUR wedding!

Answer 8

As long as it's a casual wedding and no one minds, then I don't think it would be tacky. It may be a bit of an imposition on some of your "guests" to try to serve that many people though.  

Answer 9

It's definitely not tacky, but it does sound like a pretty tall order!  I've seen it pulled off without a hitch time and time again.  As long as his family is willing, and I can't stress this next part enough: ABLE, things should be fine.  Many families have someone who's just good at marshalling the troups and making sure that everything is organized and ready to go for events like these; if there's one of those in his family, that's who you want in charge of the kitchen!  If not, maybe you want to find a cheapish caterer or ask if some family members can help you pay for it (not polite, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do).  Whatever you do, go with a real wedding cake maker, trust me!

Answer 10

There is nothing wrong w/ that. Alot of high priced catering company's food isnt that great to begin w/. Everyone doesnt like "tar tar chicken filet"  lol!  But if you are going to be serving 250 people...you have to think about how much work that would be. Where would you put all the food before the wedding?!..do they have a deep freezer? if all you have is a fridge..that isnt going to cut it.  I was going to do that for my friends wedding..but we couldnt fit all that food in the fridge. we had to put some in my fridge, her fridge, her aunt's fridge! LOL it was crazy. Maybe you can cook half the food, and have the other half catered, so you dont have to worry about that. No one will know the difference. I bet his family's home cooking is better anyways. Good luck

Answer 11

If the family is keen on the idea, I think it's great.

This is tacky:

http://www.refugepics.com/members/h2ofwl...

Answer 12

sweety no matter what you do, someone is going to think it's "tacky" or "outlandish" or somewhere in between. It's your day, you do what ever makes you and your fiance happy, just blow off everything else.

congrats to you

Answer 13

I don't think it's tacky. "Potluck" wedding receptions are becoming increasingly popular in mainstream American society largely because of their cost-effectiveness -- and they have been popular in many societies (i.e. Quaker society) for years, if not decades or centuries.

If your relatives are willing and able to help out with the food, I don't see why they shouldn't. I think you and your fiance are being very wise to not spend a fortune on your wedding reception. Have you considered just serving cake and punch to everyone at the reception?

Answer 14

not tacky at all,where i am from it is a tradition,and who else cooks better than family,i was one of the lucky ones,my uncles provided all the drink too,both alcohol and super alcohol,when i had my reception,hope you have a great wedding and a really great reception,and i wish you a long and happy marriage,good luck.p.s. i have a very huge family too-7 sisters and-4 brothers,and we had a great time.