Question:

Is he trying to make me jealous or hurt me on purpose?

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Okay, on Monday of this week I told my guy that one of my brothers friends sent me a couple messages that were basically hitting on me, but I just deleted them because obviously I am not single and not interested in this guy but that I thought it was weird, he got mad because I didn’t tell him right on the day it happened plus he said he was not mad at me but pissed at the situation and that he loves me and cares for me so much and is pissed someone was trying to talk to “his girl” and said he knows how beautiful and s**y I am and that guys will be attracted to me, but pissed that this guy is trying when he knows I am taken, anyway the very next day we talked on the phone he said that some girl sent him a couple messages and was trying to get him to hang out with her, I get jealous too, however, have a hard time verbalizing how I feel so I just got really quite and got off the phone with him. But of course was hurt and mad all night. So this morning I sent him a message that said “good morning baby, I hope you have a great day today xoxo. PS tell that girl that was texting you to leave you alone today, okay handsome?” and he responded “LOL, ok baby love you” then a couple hours later he sent me a text that said "what up s**y babe" so I just called him because I was on a break from work and when we chatted he mentioned that last night an ex called him to tell him she was getting married in two weeks and he was bummed about it like down....okay, kind of weird and hurt my feelings, why would he tell me that and be saying all this stuff about other girls? What is up with this guy????

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2 ANSWERS


  1. Strange.  He may have said something about the girls because it hurt his feelings when you got messages from guy hitting on you.  Ask him why he said it, let him know how you feel.


  2. Jealously is an immature but  dangerous form of control.  If you are a beautiful young woman, your man should honor that in you, and recognize that all other men will recognize your beauty.  That is one of your gifts to all of us, but he is the lucky one to have you.  If he wants you to live in a vacuum, and shut you out from other men speaking to you, and gets angry and upset when someone goes after you and you respect your relationship with your boyfriend and remain committed to him, and you have enough integrity to share this, hopefully not out of manipulation but out of just plain honest communication, and he cannot handle it, blow him off.  He has to grow up.  You both are playing games, and the sooner you can realize this, the sooner you can arrive at the possibility of whether this is a real relationship that allows for growth, or a sexual relationship of convenience that will fizzle as soon as he finds the next best.

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