Is is safe for my tomboy daughter to lift me all of the time?

Question

Hi , I have a 12 yr.old daughter who is just as rough as a boy.

She loves to prove how strong she is by comeing up to me and picking me up and carrying me around until I have to hollar for her to put me down. I am only 5'3 and weigh 138 lbs. She is about 5'2 and weighs about 100 lbs. How do I discourage her without hurting her feelings??

Answer 1

First off, have a talk with her and be honest with her. Tell her that you don't like her doing that and give a consequence if she does it again. She should honor your request as your feelings are just as important as hers.

It sounds like very odd behavior. I would talk to her about why she's doing it. There may be more to it than just proving her abilities. Perhaps she needs attention or feels inferior to you. Try to find another outlet for her weight lifting tendencies such as a gym class or something. You can support her in other, more positive, ways without allowing this behavior.

Good luck.

Answer 2

shes going to end up with a very bad hernia,maybe that will deter her.

Answer 3

I would lift her over my knee the next time.

Demand respect..

Answer 4

My daughter was the same way!... What i did was explain to her that i " knew she was tough" and she didn't have to pick me up all the time because i didn`t want her to hurt herself. I told her that being a young girl she is still growing, not only on the outside, but the inside too. Girls insides are much more complicated than boys. Tell her you love her too much to take any chances.

Answer 5

What J.J V means is arm wrestle. It's really fun when you have the same streangth as the other peson. You have to put your elbows on a table hold each others hands so it looks like an A then try to push the other person's hand down.  

  I was the same way when I was younger, stonger then what I looked and did what the boys did (fished, played football, hated make up and dresses) but because I didn't have any brothers and I was the oldest I couldn't really wrestle or stuff like that, I now hunt. I never really picked up my mom, she was much taller then me.

  You could get her into sports. Basketball, Baseball or Soccer if they have it a Powder Puff Football team (maybe it's just High School).  

Hope this helps,

would rather be deer hunting

Answer 6

How cute and funny!

Maybe you should use some reverse psychology and have her carry you everywhere until she gets tired! Ha, ha!

Okay seriously, I would just tell her how beautiful and strong she is but that you are worried she will get hurt and you'd rather she didn't pick you up.

Answer 7

LOL... I think you should embrace it. Most girls her age are distancing themselves from their parents, feel awkward with physical affection from their parents.  I think it's great that your daughter still likes to "rough-house" with you!  

I think if you told her stop, no matter how you did it, you would hurt her feelings and she would feel rejected.

I also like the other answerers suggestion to offer to arm-wrestle her instead.

Answer 8

Tell her your too old to get carried like that and it might break your back.  Tell her you already know that she's strong.  Or challenge her to a hand-to-hand game (i forgot what you call that game, where you push the other person's hand down to win).

Answer 9

at least she isnt hitting u to see if she can leave a bruise my cousin went through a phase with that and it HURT! but buy her like a sock it doll. u know those round things that u hit to get it to move

Answer 10

When my dad had something to tell me...he told me with his belt.

Answer 11

try buying her a set of weights and just be honest, tell her it makes you uncomfortable when she lifts you and that you bought her these to lift instead.

Answer 12

Challenge her to lift her Dad. It should occupy her while you think of a solution. Also, try not to yell, I never could respect my mother when she yelled.

Answer 13

I have a 15yr old daughter who can bench almost 300pounds, thats more than twice my weight! she can hold me in the air for over a minute with one hand, shes doing it less and less now, just let her grow out of it, she'll be fine!