Is it OK that i need space?

Question

my parents just informed me that they are splitting up. my mum said that my dad needs to "fix some things". what she means is he needs to be a better father. before the split, me and my dad barley saw each other because he worked so much. now, only 2 days after they told us they were splitting up, my dad has moved out and is asking me to do EVERYTHING with him! like, running (he has never ran before, he just knows that i like too) going shopping, buying me things, taking me to dinner, movies, etc... i mean its great and all, but i just want some time and space to think this through... i want time to get used to the split. i keep telling him that but i dont think he gets it because he is still asking me to do stuff.... i will eventually do stuff with him, but just not yet....

is this all ok to do? what do you think i should do?

Answer 1

its ok

it ok to have time for your self to figure things out

Answer 2

It is definitely ok for you to want to have time to yourself to absorb all that has happened. Your father probably only has good intentions of all this, but you need to step up and tell him he needs to be patient with your feelings...Your probably confused, and shocked. A lot of kids get blind-sided with parental separation and divorce, and not a lot of parents know how to treat their kids in these situations..the truth is, kids need their space from one or even both parents, just to sort out whats going on in your head. You probably wont hurt his feelings, but if you dont say something, he will think everything is ok..if he loves you, he will understand, and you will come around when your ready. It's healthy for kids to need their space, you are doing nothing wrong by asking for it...Good Luck!

Answer 3

I am so sorry you are going through this.

Please google a short piece called Desiderata and read it. It has all the answers for both now & forever in it.

Best wishes. uk