Is it a mom thing, or am I overreacting?

Question

Ok, I am 21 years old with a 2 year old daughter named Alliyssa. I am currently dating a man that goes by th name of Bryant who is very nice, handsome, sweet and he's a gentlemen. But the only problem is, im afraid to bring him around my daughter. I've heard cases of a woman's boyfriends molesting their children! As young as 1! So I really dont know what I should do! She really hasnt seen any other man except her father, but him being the deadbeat he is she only hgot to see him twice! And im afraid that if I bring him around her, he will hurt her. Guys please help me! I really dont want to make the wrong decision!

Answer 1

if you truly think he is a good guy i doubt your judgment will be wrong... but then again... you are quite young

Answer 2

This is actually normal. Mothers with young children tend to be very protective of them to the point where it might seem unnatural. I'm 22, and my mother still insists on making sure I eat everyday! Your instinct is to protect your child from ANYTHING, even if it costs you a boyfriend.

This just goes to show that you don't fully trust Bryant yet. You can bring him around Alliyssa, but if you aren't comfortable leaving him with her, then don't. Get to know him more, and you'll soon be able to know what type of person he is.  

Answer 3

not every man out there is a crazy child molester!  If you were afriad of him being around your daughter, why date him!?  Let him get to know her, but always stay with him.  The cases where a freak molests a child is usually when the mom is a deadbeat who leaves her daughter home alone with her boyfriend.  Trust your taste in men and slowly let everyone get to know each other.  By the way, having this fear is not a bad thing, it makes you a tue parent!

Answer 4

I think that you are overreacting.. If you really like him and you know a little about his background then it should be fine.

Answer 5

ok seriously, if ur dating a guy he needs to see ur kid.

if ur around i doubt that he can do that to ur kid.

and if ur so afraid why are u dating him???

Answer 6

Bring your daughter on an outing with him so you can all get to know each other.  Go to the zoo or something.  See how he is with kids.  I imagine you wouldn't want to date someone who doesn't like children!  Be the observer and see how he does.  

Don't be too paranoid about introducing your daughter to men in your life, but don't leave her alone with strange men either.  As a general rule, you want to get to know the guy pretty well by yourself before introducing them to your children.  Go on at least 5 dates first.  Make sure he is a "quality" person and not another loser!  You don't want your daughter growing up with a bunch of "uncles" in and out of her life.  

Answer 7

Do you think he would harm her in front of you? I mean I certainly wouldn't leave them alone together right away, but there is nothing wrong with allowing them to meet each other. Just don't make it all the time. You don't want her getting attached to him and then losing him if your relationship doesn't last. I would wait until you're serious and planning on staying together before you allow her to get too close.

Answer 8

sheesh cool down your over reacting.  

Answer 9

you are overreacting

take  a break

be cool

it will be ok

Answer 10

You are overreacting.  It will probably do your daughter good to have a man with you.  Watch very carefully how he deals with your child, don't leave them alone for more than a minute, check the lists of child predators and talk, talk and talk, with him.  If things seem too good to be true, or there are things that just don't seem right, extend your watchfulness.