Is it appropriate for a father to bathe with his 2 year old daughter?

Question

My bf just found out about his daughter less than a year ago. he now shares custody of her. I spent the the other night and witnessed him taking a bath with his 2 year old daughter. He had on boxers which he claimed he wears every time they take a bath together, but the little girl asked "Daddy are you naked?" He laughed this question off. It struck me as odd that she would even ask that. I need assurance that this may be normal father and daughter behavior being that I was never close with my fahter.

Answer 1

It's not normal around my house.

I know a lady who still showers with her four year old daughter but they're both girls. As a mother, I stopped bathing with my sons way before age 2. If the daughter recognizes "naked" and clothed, then I think it's time to forgo the community tub. There are a lot of ways to bond with children. Maybe he could read her a book while she (and she alone) is in the tub. Maybe they could go swimming together if he likes to play and splash in the water with her. I don't want to call anyone a creep but this is a little off in my opinion.

Answer 2

It's OK as long as its innocent.  In some places in the world parents and kids hang out together in the nude, like at the beach or in the sauna. It's no big deal as long as there is nothing sexual.  The human body is OK.

Answer 3

i know some dads do but personally i think it is not appropriate, maybe when they are younger than 2.  Kids will notice things & ask questions, if he was to wear a swim suit i think it would be okay.  She probably did see him naked or she wouldn't have asked the question.  

Answer 4

i dont see it as odd. the baby is only 2, and thats probably the only way he feels safe with her taking a bath. he is probably being overly cautious. but as she gets older and can wash herself without help, if that continues i would start to worry. (around 4)

Answer 5

I don't think it's appropriate for either parent to bathe with the children.  

Answer 6

Lots of parents bathe with their children at this young age.

Most people figure it's easier to get both of you clean at once than taking separate baths.

Once the child starts pointing out the differences in anatomy, then the dual bathing should stop.

It's natural for children to ask questions, so the child should not be scolded for asking questions when that time comes.

I think it shows that your BF is concerned too with her "innocence" because he wore his boxers.

I would speak to your BF about it if it does concern you. You should be able to speak openly about any topic with him, hopefully. If this is his daughter, and he is going to be sharing custody, YOU are going to be the "step-mom" and may have to take on the role of just that.

You eventually may be bathing this child too. Are you taking an active role in this child's life?  

Sorry that you didn't have a close relationship with your father. Neither did I.

Answer 7

My goodness it is one of my husband and daughters favourite things to do!

In fact, this morning, I asked my 2.5 year old if she wanted a shower with me and she said no, daddy have bath with me later.

They play boats, squirt each other, shampoo each others hair - it is a fantastic fun time together!

In the bath my husband does not even wear boxer's! There is nothing wrong with it at all.

I love watching them splash around together. It is beautiful.

EDIT: I think it is quite sad that people think it is harmful - it is unfortunate that the few perverts out there ruin a natural thing for parents to do with their children.

Next thing you know father's wont be allowed to change their daughters nappies too!

Oh, and I think it is great for the kids to notice the different in genitals. It provides a great opportunity in a safe environment to teach kids about differences and appropriateness.

Answer 8

Its normal. My husband has been in the shower and I have asked him if I could throw the 2 kids in there with him to bathe them while I get their clothes ready and stuff...makes it easier for all of us...Now my son is 4 and my daughter is 2...I just put them in a bubble bath together and let them play and then bathe them....sometimes I take a shower with them when we are in a rush and have somewhere to do...then my husband gets the clothes together and we all get ready together....

Answer 9

It's totally normal and nothing wrong with it.  Both my daughters took showers with Daddy until they were 4 years old.  There is nothing sexual about it (unless of course the father is a sicko).    

Answer 10

its verry odd

Answer 11

I think it is best for kids to bathe alone. If there was anything funny going on I am pretty sure that your daughter would tell you and if you are not sure then you could ask her.

I would tell the father that you would prefer that her wash her alone in the sink or tub.

If he gets offended say something like, you don't want her to get in the habit of taking a bath with someone."

If I was in your position I would feel the same. Good mom for being so observant.

Good Luck

Answer 12

Normal is different for every family. As for his behavior there is no issue with it.  It is his child

Answer 13

Ugh this is a tuff question... When my daughter was like 1 ish me, my daughter and her daddy would all take a bath together but after that daddy didnt join cause we knew she would start to ask questions...

She takes showers now at 4 and sometimes when we are in a hurry she takes a shower with me... I would feel ok if her and daddy took a fast shower and he had his boxers on. If they were sitting in a bath maybe not so much.

Answer 14

Yes, so long as there is no prurient interest by the father. Such closeness adds to the emotional bonding. The child will have no memory of such events  if stopped by about age 4½, but the close tie will remain.

Answer 15

Its definitely normal.

Answer 16

Little children ask funny questions, it's normal for children to take baths with their parents when my son was younger we'd take baths, I'd wear a bra and under wear, when he was less then a year I'd give him a bath when I took baths, I had post partum depression and wouldn't leave him alone.

Answer 17

Yes it's perfectly normal, she's only 2, sometimes my 3yr old jumps into the shower with her father (should I say she sneaks in when he's washing his face and his head is under water so his eyes are shut lol), My 5yr old wouldn't dare try it with him, but she will on a rare occassion get in when I am. It's not biggy, it's only a problem if there is other behaviour that isn't so innocent. But from what you've written it sounds perfectly fine, infact I commend him for wearing boxers and trying to do the right thing and not have himself exposed with her in there even if she is too young too anything yet.

Answer 18

My husband often bathes with our 4 year old daughter and did, with our other daughter and son as well.  So do (did) I.  We see nothing wrong with it.  We will with our next baby as well.  I would only be concerned if you think he was a pedephile and then I would hope you would report him and not be with him.  Skin contact is wonderful for children. There is nothing sexual or sick about it.

I find it hilarious that so many of you don't want them asking questions.  Why not?

Answer 19

2 years is too young to bathe herself.  So im sure its normal, I would not worry about it unless you find other odd things going on.