Is it below average for a 22-month old baby to only know how to say about 5 words, & she's always angry?

Question

My friend thinks something is wrong with her niece. You see many 1-yr. olds who are hyper, playful, & outgoing. The baby can only say 3 curse words, da-da, hold & she vocalizes "BEEEEE bee". & she's a very finicky eater. She only likes bread, french fries, & candy (they hardly give her candy, but she'll eat it). She throws lots of HUGE tantrums & hollers & screams like she's being terrorized. She cries all the time. She's never happy. She gets almost NO sleep because she's up crying ALL night. It seems like nothing we can do to pacify her.

She lets everyone hold her but me. She acts towards me like I have on a Freddy Krueger mask or something. She runs away from me & cries. But she tells everyone else, "Hold!" & reaches her arms out for them to hold her. I knew this baby ALL her short little life, but she'll accept letting STRANGERS hold her. I never really got to hold her. She hardly moves around, she doesn't like daytime naps. She has rotted teeth. Her mom takes poor care of her.

Answer 1

Jeez, they give her french fries?! No wonder she has rotten teeth...poor baby. :(

I think you oughta do something, I'm not sure what though. Maybe you can contact a social helper (I'm foreign so I don't know what the name is over there for these social workers, but you get what I mean hopefully), tell him/her about it, they can take a closer look at the situation around your niece.

Answer 2

A 22-month old should have a vocabulary of around 100 words, and start trying to put two words together soon, but realize a lot of these words may be hard to recognize.  Not being able to express herself may be a good part of her unhappiness, also maybe pain from the rotted teeth, especially if she's not sleeping well.  

Children are rather unpredictable in who they like and who they run from, so I'm not really sure that says anything.

Unless you truly think the child is abused or neglected, you are not really in a position to do much except offer advice, though, which should be "GO SEE A DOCTOR!"  

I've added two links to websites that describe the normal speech and language expectations for children this age.

Answer 3

Any 22 month old that is poorly cared for...proven by the fact that she already has rotten teeth, would probably act up and be fairly miserable.

I feel sorry for the poor kid.

Answer 4

try a bottle or a passifier

Answer 5

ok the speech thing comes in time, three words isnt bad. my son wasnt saying loads but he was making sounds. from ten months my son would cry for hours when put down in his cot at night, and have at least 4 screaming fits during the day. this lasted til he reached about 18months. his eating, he is still funny now. hes 3 in november, can speak very well now, sentences and putting words together with ease, behaviour, he has his moments but i think he had terrible twos ealrly.

maybe the issue with the child you describe is attention, is she getting enough? you say she doesnt move much, and that her mum takes poor care of her, if neglected this can affect a childs development? for 22months, the tantrums are to be expected, the holding thing, normal for children to switch their affections, speech, all children are different, and food can be a battlefield.

i dont think theres anything severely wrong but if the parent is concerned, see a doctor or health visitor.

Answer 6

If her mother takes poor care of her she may be poorly socialized.  She could also have an autism spectrum disorder or a sensory processing disorder.  She should be checked out by an occupational therapist to determine whether this is a larger problem or just an issue of poor parenting.

Answer 7

It is not unusal for a 22 month old not to have a large vocabulary.  There may be some things she says that no one understands yet, but she knows the meaning.  However, it sounds like she is very unhappy.  It may be because of the way her mother takes care of her (or lack of) and her eating habits.  It also sounds like she is cranky from not sleeping.  I wonder if she may have a form of autism because children with autism do not like to sleep at all.  However, they wouldn't go around to strangers and ask them to hold them, either.  I would suggest to the parents that they may to get her a full evaluation and make her an appointment at the doctor.  It sounds like something is going on, and it is very likely it is just bad parenting.  A child doesn't know the proper way to act if no one teaches them.  Discipline is an essential part of a child's development.  It is the parents job to teach them right from wrong.

Answer 8

Her parents are abusing her, she's malnourished, under-stimulated and she needs to see a dentist. That child should be taken away from them before they permanently damage her. Please report them. She probably does have developmental delays, whether  from the non-care or whether she was born with them. There is a chance it can be turned around if she's taken away now. She needs REAL food, attention, love, and stability. Makes me want to scream.

Answer 9

I'm curious as to how much time you spend with this baby and her family.  Your post starts out soft and ends with some pretty hard accusations.  I'm not doubting that you're concerned, but I'm curious why it goes from "the baby is a finicky eater and can only say three words" to "she has rotted teeth and her mom takes poor care of her."  

I know that my 22 month old is very shy and doesn't vocalize much around strangers.  But, when she's alone with me and my husband, she's a little talker!  It could be that  she's overwhelmed by company that she's not used to.  As far as the eating habits, many little ones getting into their first "real foods" are prone to tantrums when they're not happy with what's put on their plate.  Has the mother of this child talked to the pediatrician to get some feeding advice?  We introduced a new food each week, which allowed our child to get comfortable with it, before moving onto something new.  (And, honestly, if you eat it, too -- and look like you're enjoying it -- few kiddos want to be left out of something tasty.)

Ahhh, the sleeping problem.  Every child learns how to self-soothe at a different rate.  You can tell the parents that creating a stable bedtime routine each evening will help the baby learn that its time to go to sleep.  As far as crying it out, each parent has to figure out whether that works for them.  When we went through it (at about 7 or 8 months old), we let our daughter cry for 2 or 3 minutes, then went in and checked on her, then we'd let it go for 5 minutes, etc.  We didn't allow her to cry for more than a few minutes...it worked.  

Bottom line:  Tell the mom to call her pediatrician and ask all of her questions!

Answer 10

ummm it can be autism but you should take her to the doctors or if not check what the symptons for autism are and see if they relate with her..those randon tantrums arent normal.

good luck

Answer 11

It has to do with her home life. It's sad but true. Is the mother young? Some kids are very poorly taken care of. They act out because they see everyone else around them act out. It seems no one pays much attention to her. Also she may not like you if you don't get along with her mother/parents. It's really weird but no matter how neglected a kid is they are more than loyal to their parents. I would speak to responsible adult who could intervene. Maybe grandparents? Well good luck its hard to a child struggle.