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Is it better for a kid to grow up with no mother or with a violent, mentally abusing mother?

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And in which scenario is the kid more likely to grow up to be violent himself / herself

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  1. Monkey see monkey do.

    Its better to have no mother at all.


  2. I grew up with my grandmother because my mother had mental issues.   I am now 29 and have a great family of 4. I live a very happy life! I vote no mother.

  3. No mother.

  4. It is better to grow up with no mother than a violent abusive one.  As for which child would be more violent, one from an abusive mother or one that was raised without his/her mother, I think that depends on the child.  Some may think the child that is raised seeing violence on a day to day basis learns that is the way you deal with your anger, but while this is true, a child that grows up without a mother at all may have some anger issues and in turn be violent.   Of course, neither of these could be true.  You could have a child that is abused everyday by his/her mother and they decide they will never put another person through what they went through.  They may even grow up to be very productive parts of society, including our counselors and such, because of their understanding for the situation.  And a child that grows up without a mother could very well be a very nurturing parent themselves.  It all depends on the child and their internal self.  Environment plays a big role in our lives, but it CAN NOT determine who we become!  That is up to each of us...

  5. No mother of course. Without a mother a child can grow up to be more independant and often turn into high-achievers. A child who has a violent and abusive mother does not get the best strat in life and  may grow up feeling inadequate with no self-worth or even go on to be violent towards or abuse their own kids as that is all they've known.

  6. Wow, both suck. But I guess no mother because an abusive one can emotionally scar and mess up the kid's life forever.

  7. no mother

    and in each senario theres a posibility of them ending up violent etc

    but they might not want to end up like there mum

  8. Id say theyd grow more violent with no mother cause thered be one to yell at him and hed feel free unless he he lived with hid dad

  9. Well, as it turns out both scenarios have devastating effects on children.  Children without their parents in the picture are more likely to become pregnant early, less likely to be educated, and more likely to use drugs.  Same goes for abused children.  That is if there is not another strong family unit in place to guide and support the child.

  10. Without, obviously.

  11. It's much better for a kid to grow up with no parent at all, than be raised by abusive ones.

    A kid who is abused, is more likely to pass on a legacy to the next person, or their own children.

    At least one who had no guidance, can still receive guidance. Often times, abused people are set in their ways after so long.

  12. Children learn from their parents. If they do not realize the faulty of their parents actions, then they will see nothing wrong with what their parents are doing.

    Their mother is the first one to care for them, right? Well, if that is so, they will intimidate them. Intimidation is how humans learn. Like mother, like child.

    I think that if a child realizes the path their mother is taking is a wrong one and is taught that, then the child would be able to cope with a horrible mother.

    But if it were up to me, nobody would have a violent mother.

  13. Without a mother.

    Are you done with your tantrum?

  14. i mean at the same time that u shouldnt have an abusive mother i believe u should it will teach u too be strong and it will teach u to be able to handle abusive  bullies etc and to have courage and heart knoowing when u were yunger u surv ived the abusive mother so when ur older ur not afraid of nothin then agin a mother tht is abusive could ruin a kids life for ever wat if she killed u so i mean its totaly up to u and how u take things.

  15. In my situation, I personally chose to stay with my abusive mother and take care of her.  

    But for other kids, I wouldn't want them to go through the same thing..I would say no mother is better, even though I'm not following my own advice.

    Since I was already exposed to my mother for so long, I love her and have compassion for her, it's very hard to kick her out of my life. It's just something right that I think I should do for myself, but that doesn't mean everybody else has to follow me.

  16. no mother

    with an abusing mother

  17. No mother is much better. I know people who have had to grow up without a mother figure and they're good people.

    People who are abused as children are most likely to pass it to do it to their children and so on.

  18. well kids lead by example so my vote is having no mother is better than dealing with violence

  19. No mother.

    Being abused as a child is incredibly scarring and can take years, if ever, to get over it.

    Also if the child has no mother then we can assume that someone is raising this child so whoever is raising him/her would be like a mother.

  20. No mother, and the the kid who is raised with abuse is more likely to abuse.  I'm not saying that EVERY person who has been abused will abuse, but chances of it are greater.

  21. No mother is better than that.

  22. Why are you limiting it to mother-  substitute parent for the word mother.  And the answer is the same for either gender - no parent.   A child should not be subjected to constant violence on any level.

  23. its never good for a kid to be abused. And that actually leads to the kid being abusive himself/herself.

  24. With no mother.

  25. No matter who the caregiver is a violent, mentally abusing person has no reason for raising children.

  26. No mother

  27. You do not give us much choice.  When someone has a positive upbringing, inside a positive environment, they have  a much better chance of developing into a rational, sane, law abiding citizen.  There is no cause and effect relationship, but children raised with a violent, mentally abusing parent normally have a harder way to go, developmentally speaking.

  28. Both situations sound bad.

  29. no mother! i had to think about this a little, and yeah it would be better to have no mom than one who was violent and mentally abusing!

    i think someone who has a mom like that will turn out to be more violent, than one who doesnt know what its like to have a mom. lets just hope they have a good dad?

  30. No mother, assuming the kid has somebody who's acting like a parent.  You can't just throw a kid out there with no adults around.
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