Is it better to be married before joining the Marines? Or does it matter when you get married?

Question

My boyfriend and I have been together for awhile now, I have a daughter from a previous marriage. My boyfriend has decided that he wants to join the Marines. He has talked about getting married, but hasn't asked yet. I know that he will be deployed, and that he will be gone for long periods of time. I cannot leave my daughter, or take her with me. She has a father who is very much in her life. But yet I want to be there for my boyfriend, or whatever our relationship status maybe when the time comes. What can I expect from him being in the Marines?

Answer 1

if your already thinking about getting married than its better to be married first because than your benifits will start the day he leaves for basic.

Answer 2

make sure u marry him before so u can get benefits and he will put u on everything and he will get more $$ too which means more $$ for u  

Answer 3

Depends on how long you've been together. When you have a child involved, you have to do what's best for the child. If you marry in to the military, of course you're going to be moving a lot and some times very far away. It's not far for your daughter not to be able to see her dad if they are that close.

If I were you, I would give it time and wait. It's not the end of the world if he gets deployed and you didn't marry him. You can still date while he's gone and see how it works. It's not easy being a parent or a spouse let alone being one that's doing all the work while the other is gone.  

Answer 4

Get married before.  That way you can both get all of the benefits the military gives.  You won't even be able to get on the installations without an ID card.  

Yes, he will be gone a lot.  That's another reason to get married.  The military offers a lot of support services to deployed spouses.  Plus you can meet other wives.  Military wives have their own support groups and can give you so much info.  Then there are things you can do with your daughter...the list goes on and on.  Don't wait, do it first.

Answer 5

You should marry him before he goes.  That way you get military insurance and other kudos.  Plus he will know you are waiting for him.  He'll have something to look forward to and a person to write.  You can expect him to be gone most the time.  

Answer 6

The same as any other branch of the military. Don't try to make him marry you before he goes. Maybe this is something he wants to do just for himself.

Answer 7

monetarily, the benefits are much better if you get married before he joins up.  however, make sure that he wants to marry you before joining up and it is not something that is he doing simply out of money or convenience.    

Answer 8

You should marry him not only because of the benefits but you will be able to check on him, live with him on base if you so choose one day, you will be notified and have certain rights if anything happens.,  Wives have rights, girlfriends do not.

I would go with him and take your daughter. This way she gets to live in some different places and stuff can be worked out with her father. You need to be there for him to and as a family. You can always come back hom whiel he is deployed and honestly that will be a lot. I knew soem Marine wives nad their husbands spent so much time gone. One was married for 5 years and her husband was deployed a total of 4 of those 5 years so be with him when you can.

Answer 9

Get married and go with him wherever he goes after basic training.

As for your daughter and her father that is very much in her life...things happen for a reason and no matter how far you travel away, he will see his daughter, but keep in mind that you may end up having to split the difference for the travel of your daughter to see her father since your the one moving away.

Answer 10

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Once you've reached the 6-month barrier in any relationship, it's okay to entertain the idea of marriage, unless you're in your early 20's or younger (if so, please take more time than 6 months).

Most couples, after 6 months of dating, will have an idea that this is someone whom they might want to spend the rest of their life with.

After 6 months, the primary way a relationship ends is more about the mistakes that were made than it is about something being wrong with you or wrong with him.

Since you have dated him 6 months now, he knows a lot of your insecurities and he knows most of your flaws, and they haven't scared him off.

You've had fights that have been resolved, so you know it's possible to disagree and still love each other...

So after 6 months, you're going to be looking at him in terms of 'Can I live with these characteristics he has for the rest of my life?