Is it ever improper to send a sympathy card?

Question

For instance if a family member of a person you had a serious relationship with passed away would it be allright to send a card to the home of the family? By the way I was close to the family for several years. I don't think I should send it to my ex's home. (He is happily married now) and I'm not sure it would be proper to send the card to his home. What do you think ?????

Answer 1

It wouldn't be bad to send it to the home of someone else in the Family, and not at all improper. After all you divorced him, it's not like they have to pretend they never knew you. In an ex-family situation the only improper sympathy card might be one to his new wife on the day of their wedding.

Answer 2

It is sometimes improper to send a sympathy card -- but not in the situation you described if you sent it to the home of the family, since you were close to the family for several years... UNLESS you knew for certain that such as gesture would not be welcome.  You are correct in that it would be improper to send it to your ex's home.

Answer 3

Absolutely it's okay to send a card!  That shows them that you are thinking of them in their time of loss.

Are you worried your card will make things harder for the person?  If so, don't worry - it's a positive thing.  The reality of the loss is there, and the survivor can use all the support available.

Because it's your ex, I would make it short and just let them know you are thinking of them and wish them peace.

Answer 4

I sent it to the family of the person, not the person from the past relationship.If you don't feel comfortable sending to the home, send it to the place of the service. I wanted to send to the family when my ex's parents died. I even went to the viewing just out of respect.Compassion is not a bad thing.

So sorry, God Bless.

Answer 5

Send the card, and even send it to your ex. You knew the person as a result of the ex, so sending a sympathy card is not some ploy to get back with them. GEEZ! People don't sweat the small stuff.

Answer 6

If you had a marriage and a family with the ex, then it wouldn't be improper to send one to him as well as the family, or address one to the entire family.  

Its as though your ex has any obligation to reply, it is an expression of compassion for their loss and nothing more.

Answer 7

Sending a sympathy card to the family would not be improper. I think it'd be a very kind gesture on your part. It would be in poor taste to send a card to your ex.

Answer 8

Yes it would be OK it shows the family that your thinking of them  at there time of grief.... its OK its a nice thing for you too do ...its not like your trying too hurt anyone it just that your thinking of the family...  i think its a nice gesture on your part.....

Answer 9

send the sympathy card to anyone you are or were close to who is related to the person who died.  You can send a card to more than one person.

It is important to express compassion and a fondness for the person who died and sympathy for the surviving friend or family member.  if it would not upset the ex's wife, send him one too.  Just focus on how much you cared for the deceased.