Is it illegal in alberta to not return My child to the other parent?

Question

Is it against the law In Alberta, if i refuse to return my child to his mother? I am On the birth certificate (my paternity is stated), and No Court has pointed out where our Child Lives, and who has custody. His mother is constantly going out drinking, Is a pathological liar (literally You never know if whats coming out of her mouth is True or Not) Has Commited Child abuse early In my sons life (hes a almost 1.5 years old now and yes its all documented for Court, it was adjourned Via Sine Die when we were Going to try and work things out) But what im wondering is if i Refuse to Return him to the Other parent , can She call the police and have them Take him from me? I know It is not good if your using the child as a pawn, But as soon as something with her friends comes up (or boyfriend whichever) all she wants to do is just take off And Drink (Happens More then 2X a week, Every week),and her parents Now just Say yea they will watch our son, cause she would leave Even if they said no, Or she would start a humongous Fight. I love my son and i want the responsibility Of keeping him safe 24/7 and watching him Grow, helping him through the difficulties he may have in his life when he is older, But i dont want to Take the risk of Telling her no hes not returning with her, and having the police come and take him back, and then her refusing to allow me to see him again, I have searched the internet for useful information, but i need a little bit more, if anyone knows anything that would be a great help, Thankyou verymuch for your time.

Answer 1

If there is no custody order in place, as the biological father you have rights to your child.   You are not breaking the law by having your child.

I would first caution you against leaving the province if you have your child, as you may get into the realm of a parental abduction situation.

However, what you post seems to be pointing more to is whether you can keep your child from it's mother.

If you were to take your child and keep him from his mother, you may get a visit from the police.  However, without a custody order in place, there is very little likelihood that they would actually apprehend the child (unless there was some sort of indicated danger to the child).

That would not stop the child's mother from going to court and getting a judges order for the police to apprehend the child....which is a possibility.

The BEST course of action for you to take, if you have concerns for your child, is to get to court and get a custody order.  Whether it be full custody, joint custody, or some other sort of conditions, you NEED to have it in writing (from the courts).

As well, if you have significant concerns regarding dangers/abuse, etc, then you should notify child welfare.  Alberta child welfare workers have excellent powers to be able to ensure the safety of the child.  However, they need to know what is happening (ie you need to call them and tell them your concerns).

Good luck.  This is an extremely common issue facing parents (in Alberta and everywhere) and the best course of action to start is to get things before the courts so that everyone knows where they stand.

Answer 2

This is a very touchy issue to address.

Are her parents on your side?  Do they complain about their daughters behavior?

Is your son safe with her parents?

If you answered yes to these, than things could work more in your favor.

What I mean is this...I know is the U.S the mother will always have more rights than the father, and he has to struggle a bit more to prove his case in a situation like this.  Do I think it is right?  No.  

I would first start off by speaking with her parents.  Explain your concerns, and express your desire to have him live with you.  Explain they will have visitation rights, and you by no means expect anything but a great relationship between your son and them.  Then, contact an attorney.  You want to have legal guidance when doing something like this because if you just take him, and she files against you, you could actually do more harm than good.  They could end up faulting you and stripping you of your rights and giving guardianship to her parents.

I understand you want your son, and you want to give him a better life.  However, there is always the right way to go about doing this.  And taking him and not returning him is certainly not the way to go.

Good luck dear...and don't give up!

ADD:

Get you an attorney.  Fight for you son.  

As for your comments about her being a good mom...don't be nice.  You don't have to.  You can't say she is a good mom followed with a but.  She has potential to be a good mom, but as of now, she is not.  She is careless in her responsibilities of being a mother, and places everyone else above her child.  She needs parenting classes it seems.

I became a mother at the age of 19 going on 20.  My life as I knew it ended.  I didn't dump my child on friends or family.  I limited myself to going out maybe once a month.  My children are my top priority.  And you know, her parents are allowing this to happen...so, I guess they are just as much to blame.

I know money can be tight...but, if you love your son, get an attorney and fight for him.  Especially if he is your main priority and his well being is what you have in mind.