Is it inappropriate to request wedding guests not wear a color?

Question

If the bride is not wearing white, is it totally rude to request the guests not wear the color of the wedding dress? I know the white is suppose to symbolize purity & virginity, but if the bride chooses to wear green, or blue or, purple, would you be offended if she requested you didn't as well? In cultures where the bride wears red, are the rules the same as the not wearing white rule for Western cultures?

Answer 1

Sorry - being the bride does not allow you to dictate what your guests may or may not wear to your wedding. If I got an invitation that demanded (because that's really what you are doing) what guests wear (or don't wear), I would either not go at all, or wear a color that was extremely close to what you said not to wear.

Brides can set the tone for their wedding (formal, semi-formal, casual, etc), but they do not get to play god for a day and dictate what everyone else shows up in. Be grateful you are having anyone show up to witness your special day.

Answer 2

Weddings in the USA have come a long way from the traditional white wedding gowns. I have even seen black. Because it isn't white, I wouldn't offend my guests. I wore an ivory dress to my son's wedding. Remember it's your special day and you are sharing it with relatives and friends and that's what counts! Best wishes.

Answer 3

Why would it matter if guests are wearing the same color as the bride? It's not like they would be taking the attention away from her! I think it is rude, unnecessary, and trivial to suggest your guests to wear (or not to wear) a particular color. Of all things wedding related, this should be of the least concern! And if you're using cultural traditions to make your point, you should know that tradition had the bridesmaids wear white when the bride wore white in order to "confuse the evil spirits."  

Answer 4

You are a BRIDE for a day, not a QUEEN! You cannot tell your subjects what they can and cannot wear based upon a change in your own personal preference of wedding gown. It is accepted not to wear white or any shades thereof in deference to the bride, but because you have changed your mind and gone outside the box (bravo, by the way) it is unfair to expect your guests to have to toss out more colors from their wardrobes in order to attend your wedding celebration.

Odds are very good that whatever color you did choose for your gown, that no one is going to have on that exact shade, unless you are wearing black. If you are wearing black, then it is even more unfair, as most people these days do wear black to weddings.

Good Luck and Congratulations!  

Answer 5

I don't think it's inappropriate, you just might want to find a way to word the invitation so that you aren't directly asking them not to wear the color.

Answer 6

You can request it but do not be upset or surprised if the request is ignored.  Today when people wear white and black to weddings and dress up like Halloween people are wearing what ever they please to weddings  

Answer 7

If they're offended about something as simple as that, do you really want them at such a special day?

   "We are both excited as the bride is going to be breaking tradition and wearing a gorgeous green dress.  Feel free to wear white, but let's let our bride rock and roll in green!  We can't wait to see you!"

Answer 8

I think she should only ask  that to her closest friends and relatives, the rest don`t really matter, they just go for the free food and beer..lol

Answer 9

I have said it here before, if a bride tells me what I can or can't wear to a wedding, count on one less guest and present. It is extremely rude. It is not my fault the bride chooses to be un conventional. If I do not wish to buy a new dress for the wedding, I will not. If the bride chooses to wear a color, she does so. She does not get to flog the guests with her decision.

There are ways to convey the information to guests without making such a huge big deal. The last wedding I went to, it was such a non issue I had to practically beat the MOTH to hear what the brides colors were.

Answer 10

I think it is inappropriate.  Its just as annoying to tell a guest "don't wear green" as it is to demand "all guests wear yellow".

It is the brides perogative to include these "requests" in her invitation and if I got an invite asking me to wear or not to wear any particular color, I'd be declining the wedding and done with it.  The bride may not know what colors I like or what colors flatter me.  I have 1 or 2 special occassion dresses in my closet that are worn, at most, 3 times a year.  I don't want to have to go out and buy a new dress just to suit a bride's whim.

And if the bride happened to be a very close friend/relative - like my sister or cousin who will be my maid of honor - I'd call her and tell her what I think of her lousy idea.

Answer 11

Not at all, as long as the wedding isn't in a very formal/traditional church.

I wouldn't recommend this in a Catholic or Pentacostal church setting..

However, most likely no-one will have a problem with it and I actually have attended a wedding where we were told to wear a certain color and I heard no rumors of complaint..

But anyone who would complain about not wearing a color doesn't deserve to attend your wedding and congratulations!