Is it necessary to use the term "mixed race" to describe adoptees?

Question

My biological children could be considered "mixed race" but I've never even thought of using that term to describe them. Is this something that people do that I am missing?

Personally, I find the term unnecessary. My children are my children and that's it.

Why do people here use it?

Answer 1

I don't know why people need to describe anyone as mixed race when we're not filling out forms that ask us our ethnic/racial background.  It does seem rather unnecessary.

By the way, I am shocked at the news Alisa has provided.  People are actually stealing babies out of strollers!  We all need to keep a watch out to make sure any young children are safe.  Thanks for the heads up, A.

Alisa, I am glad to hear your first mother wasn't coerced, because that way she doesn't have to deal with the feelings that those who were coerced feel.  Don't discount or minimize what other first parents might be experiencing.

Answer 2

I think some people use it to annouce that they've gotten a special needs baby and perhaps are seeking more praise for doing so, rather than waiting and paying more for a newborn white infant.

Answer 3

if they are mixed race, what would you like us to call them?

Answer 4

I'm not understanding the question fully.

Your children are biological children, so I assume you're referring to those who adopted children that are bi-racial (and that doesn't mean black/white only) or that you see this on adoption photolistings?

On adoption photolistings, I feel it necessary to mention the children are mixed race, because some people may not be able to cover the cultures of one or both races the child is.

For instance, I am native american and white.

It was important for me to adopt children with a native american heritage to share this with them as they grow.

As for someone saying "I adopted a mixed race baby"...well, I agree...it isn't something that they "need" to modify...but what if they are proud of the fact their child is of mixed ancestry?

If they're boasting, I can understand your point as well...but then again, it is honorable that they are "race blind" and said yes, regardless of the child's racial heritage.

Answer 5

it's used to describe (egads) non-adoptees as well!  there's mixed race on census forms!  i choose to use it because i'm not the perfect white baby everyone is snatching out of strollers.  I am mixed race . . .

ETA:::: No one is saying what you need to call your kids -- that's up to you.

ETA::::  yes, it was a horrible, absolutely horrible experience!!!!!!! my parents were mixed race too :)  i guess i'm catching on to the anti-adoption rhetoric here and callin' me mamaw and papaw the infertiles that they were.  Hot Dog!  They took me on vacation with them every year.  They made me unwrap christmas presents that they got me.  And, get this, I had to pose in family pictures with them, too.  It's still tearing me up to this day . . . .

ETA:  CP -- Does it bother you when so many other adoptees use those terms?

Answer 6

I don't think that folks on here use the term to label the children, but to comment on some of the difficulties facing some children in getting placed.  They ask you about it right on the application.  Will you consider mixed race children?  Will you consider a child of another race? etc.  So when people state the fact that they adopted a mix raced child, I don't think they are tooting their own horn.  I think it is more a statement of their reasons for adopting in the first place.  Everyone has their reasons.  Some people can't have their own and are looking for very a very specific child to fill that void and give them the family life they crave.  Some people have a lot of love to share and want to enlarge their family, but can't handle the difficulties that their entire family may face by adopting a child of another race.  Then some people are simply out there wanting to help a needy child.  They don't care about race or color or religion or anything like that because they can handle those types of issues.  So, I really believe the statements are more about the adoptive parents and their reasons for adopting than about the children they adopted.

Good question, though.

Answer 7

Its about as necessary as using the term "desperate, greedy infertiles" or "angry, bitter adoptees"  -- not at all.

Adopting but not looking for a medal.

ETA:  It bothers me that people use those terms to negate anothers feelings and experiences.

Answer 8

While I can't speak to the "mixed race" issue, I can speak to the "special needs" issue especially since I've been accused of seeking sympathy here on Y!A for using it.

We adopted a child with a life-threatening disorder.  I do not refer to my son as my "special needs" son.  However, there are times here on Y!A that I choose to put the special needs out there in describing our son's situation, or to educate others about some of the things we went through with a child with special medical needs.  I also sometimes use it to educate others about MCAD (my son's disorder) because it is rare.

I do not use "special needs" as a way to seek sympathy or to demean my son or other adoptees.  I use it as a way to explain our situation when necessary or to educate others about disorders.  I've been accused of seeking sympathy, but I can honestly say that was never my intention.

I wonder if some people here have the same good intentions as I do, but when they word it as "mixed race" it does not come across in the written word as it is meant.  I doubt that these people go around saying they adopted a "mixed race" child, but perhaps for them in explaining their question or answer, they feel it is necessary to put that out there so that you understand the side they are speaking from.  We cannot see their family to understand that race is involved, so they have to be able to designate that in some way for the written expression.

Does that make sense?

Answer 9

The only time I would ever use "mixed" and "adopted" in the same sentence is to describe the dog I adopted from the local shelter.  Those terms just don't seem right for humans.

Answer 10

"mixed race" means they are a mixed race... they use it because that is what they are... for instance i dont know what u or ur children are  but lets say ur white and the father is black...what are ur kids....black and white and instead of saying that u would say they are mixed....nothing wrong with that

i dont see anything wrong with that term???why does it bother u so much anywayz???

Answer 11

How else would the agencies grade their price lists, silly!

You know how it goes:

Healthy White Infant = most expensive

Mixed Race = a bit cheaper

African American and 'special needs' = bargain basement

They need to terms to discriminate

The American Infant adoption system is NOT A-OK; it is disgusting

Answer 12

What about multi-cultural?

Answer 13

There is a difference.  Many a-parents-to-be only want healthy, all Caucasian babies because that is what they are themselves.   Nothing exactly wrong with that as most races marry amongst each other.  Just common.

Yes, as another poster indicates, mixed-race is even on the census forms. It is also a medical issue because a child could potentially have genetic disorders common to one race and the other (i.e. Tay Sacs and Sickle Cell).

Answer 14

I guess you are talking about me.  I have never used the term "mixed race" i do find it offensive.  I have stated that our oldest is biracial because i thought it was an important part in explaining how we ended up adopting from Ethiopia.

I hear a lot here how aparents just want white babies.  I wanted to express that there are a-parents that do not turn babies down because of the color of their skin.  Yes as a first time parents we did want to experience the baby thing.

I also wanted to help and or inform other a-parents about the responsibility of learning how to care for their childrens hair.  How important it is to have good role models that are African American for our children. And the list goes on.

I am so proud of my daughters, and as a result our, African American culture and Italian culture.  As a summer project we are all doing research on our Ethiopian culture too.  It is so important that i want all my children exploring and reading about Ethiopia and how we can incorporate our new culture into our family life.

If anyone is a mixed race its my husband and myself.  We are pretty much mutts.  There is no sense of culture.  Its a pretty empty feeling.  

Biracial is a descriptive term that i use in some instances when i felt it was necessary and relevant to our adoption story and experiences.  Know that everytime I use it I say it with PRIDE.  

I do not need a pat on the back from anyone. Again i can assure you that i cannot name one person who has ever assumed we adopted.  I am the one who either cheated on my husband and he forgave me or i was a single mom before we were married. That is what EVERYONE assumes.  We aren't out there getting these pats on the back its quite opposite i can assure you.  You know what i do i laugh.  I laugh in their faces as i walk by their stone cold glares and shaking of heads. I am proud of my family and i love all my children.

Answer 15

Being a mixed race person myself I as well as other multiracials that I know we are proud to be mixed raced and to call ourselves mixed raced because that is what we are. Its no different then telling a child they are white or black etc. Mixed raced is not an adoptee term it applies to anyone who is mixed raced, adoptees and non-adoptees.  In my honest opinion any child that is mixed raced whether they have 2 parents who are of a different race or at least one parent who  is  also mixed raced which would make the children MGM’s Multigenerational  Mixed they should be raised to be proud of being mixed. It is also even more important in adopted mixed raced people.  Did you know that Multiracial people can have many of the same issues that adoptees have whether their adopted or not.  

Maybe some people are proud that they adopted a mixed raced child. I personnel think its something to be proud of  not so much the child racial mixture but that person(s) can look past race and that's what it takes for someone who is not mixed raced  to adopt a mixed raced child or a child that is a diffrent race then them.  

I know a few people who have adopted bi-racial children. They don’t gloat that their children are Mixed raced, but then they are honest with people who may question and are honest to their children about who they truly are. Say the child asks what race they are, their parent(s) tells them they are Multiracial or mixed raced.

Answer 16

Isabel,

If your children grew up in Hawaii (where I grew up), that term would be mute.  I have and still do, have friends that are every kinda ethnic mix that anyone could imagine on this planet.  Race was not an issue, we were all MIXED to some degree.

It didn't matter to us as children, but now we have grown and have to fill out forms and describe ourselves..........WHY?

Your children will always be themselves...No matter what box they check off on a form........

God Bless

Answer 17

TBH i have never herd the term used with reguards to adoption. I associate the term "mixed race" to do with people of different nationalities.

I thaught thats what the term was!

Answer 18

I would use the term biracial.  It's much more politically correct and less ignorant sounding.

Answer 19

I don't think the term 'mixed race' is used as a description for adoptees as much as it is just to describe the ethnicity of a child in general.  The poster above me said it well...

My daughter is mixed (a combination of two different ethnic backgrounds), however, I do not 'label' her as such to mean it in a derogatory way nor do I really dwell on that as I look at her as my daughter, not as 'oh this is my mixed child.'  I will say I am not one of those anally PC type of people so that term in no way offends me unless inviduals think they can put themselves on a pedastal & think they are better because their child is mixed...in those cases most likely that individual has issues with themselves, so in order to feel some sort of 'worth' they think that by boasting about how their child is somewhat different from them that they're better...um, no.  

If people ask with sincerity if my babe is 'mixed' I tell them yes she is & feed into their inquiring minds. I do not find it offensive simply because we do live in the age where there are a lot of 'mixed cultures/ethnic' babes.  At least where I live it's very common.  If they question it or stare in a rude manner they get no love, no answers.

Answer 20

I think the more appropriate term would be biracial or multiracial. Thats what I would perfer.

Answer 21

Ok... At first I thought you had a problem with the term.  But I read further and saw what really bothered you.

It bothers me as well.

I know a couple who adopted a little girl from India.  They never introduce her as their daughter, she is their "Indian daughter" or the daughter "we adopted from India".  This couple are both redheads, blue eyes.  Anyone can TELL by looking at her that she is not their biological child.  

I don't understand their need to point out the difference.