Is it normal for a 3-year-old to start peeing in the bed from preschool?

Question

Up until I was about three, my Grandmother babysat me at her house. Then, I started preschool.

My Mom said that I started peeing in the bed every night after that even though I had been potty trained for quite awhile.

She then threatened to make me start wearing a diaper to bed like a baby if I didn't stop. Apparently I stopped peeing that night.

I have a daughter now and I'm wondering what i should do if the same thing happens to her.

Answer 1

Most children's bodies are not physically ready to be COMPLETELY potty trained until the age of three, so even though your mother told you that you were potty trained for a while, that might not have actually been the case.  Perhaps she was really good at "reading your signs" and prompting you to go to the bathroom when you showed these signs.  

I'm very concerned about her threats to you - this is not something you should practice with your own daughter.  Encouragement and praise are much more effective.  Your mother could have caused you some psychological damage.

It's very possible the change from being in your grandmother's care to going to preschool could have "caused" you to start wetting your bed at night.  Sure, it could have been stressful to you, but there are other things to consider.  Perhaps your grandmother was not offering you enough to drink throughout the day - a tactic often used by parents to not have to deal with potty issues.  But the preschool would have been required to offer you liquids for meals and snacks and water throughout the day, especially after physical activity like outdoor play.  You might have been playing more actively at preschool making you more thirsty and causing you to drink more.  Conclusion - there could have been other very normal explanations.

As for your own daughter, don't push her into potty training before she's ready.  Talk to your pediatrician, read books, look for reputable online sources to find out what the readiness signs are.  Make a huge deal out of successful steps - praise and encouragement.  Don't make a big deal out of accidents, just clean her up and move on.  There are lots of resources for succesful potty training.  On a personal note, Skittles and M&M's were a big hit for my son - one for #1 and two for #2.

Answer 2

Every child has different lengths of learning, maybe diapers are the best result for night times.

Answer 3

give preschool a try, she may o maynot pee her pants. if it happens during the day she may just foget to go, preschool is very exciting. if at not find out from her tesvhers if anything unusual is going on, if not chalk it up to having a long day and sleeping straight through the night.

Answer 4

It probably happened when you were young because something stressed you about going to school (whether it be going to school or maybe not being at home - change). If this happens to your daughter just symathize with her. Tell her it happened to you and that it won't last. Don't tell her you're going to put her in a diaper (that's like a punishment) but if you feel the need to use a diaper just use pull-ups at night and tell her it's just temorary. If you add stress to her then it might continue. Good luck.

Answer 5

Maybe it did not occur to you mother that babies at three, four, or even five, may not be ready to be separated from their parent/grandparent.

This could have been caused by to much stress placed upon the child, and or separation issues.

Learn from her mistakes, and do not repeat them.

Never threaten a child, or shame him/her; if it happens, place a leak proof cover over the mattress, and find out the reason for this behavioral change.

Check with your state on the compulsory attendance age, but

pre-school is not mandatory, or needed for good academic skills., and neither is Kindergarten.

Kindergarten is optional in almost all states.

Answer 6

Threatening children who wet the bed is the incorrect way to deal with the problem.  I doubt seriously that your mother's version of events is accurate.  As you will get older you will find that older people's memory of events is often much more organized and convienent than reality could ever be.  And most of their stories have the theme of them being right.  This is an actual psychological memory effect called choice-supported bias, and it is common in older people.

There are good child development books which discuss this very normal behavior.  You just have to be mindful of all the possible causes and do your own research on how to solve these problems.

Answer 7

It sounds somewhat normal because of the change from being babysit by Grandma to then starting preschool. If this does happen to your daughter you can make sure that she goes to the bathroom before her bedtime. Then before you go to bed check up on her. Don't wake her up but if you see that she needs to go to the bathroom again make sure she does. If you do need to use the diaper for her do not threaten her with it. Say, we are going to have you wear a pull up to bed for a week so you know when you need go to the bathroom. Use plenty of encouragement with her. At this pointe she fine. I hope that I helped you out.

Answer 8

My oldest son (he's 7 now) still has problems every once in a while (thank god it's been about a month now), but he has a problem with sleeping heavily but when he does pee on himself is when it is cold in his room. As for my youngest son (he just turned 4), I have no problem with him. None what-so-ever. He was used to staying home with me until this pass year and he started pre-k and still has no problems.

Just let her try. She might not have the same problems. She might like school.

Answer 9

I wouldn't say that is normal, but you never know what kind of stress or maybe you were really tired and slept heavily and didn't feel the urge to go to the bathroom that night. Your daughter might not wet the bed, but if she does, be a little more understanding than to issue a threat. That could have been a coincidence also and probably had nothing to do with why you stopped. I totally agree with Mr. Crankypants about this question.