Is it normal for a 6 year old to "have" to sleep with someone at night?

Question

My mom's boyfriend has 2 kids 1 is 16 (boy) 1 is 6 (girl) My mom has me and my sister. Every night the littlest girl that is 6 has to sleep with someone. If she doesn't sleep with someone she wakes up SCREAMING... Even if someone just left to go get a drink... at her mom's she sleeps with her mom and at her dad's she sleeps with her brother or me or sometimes her dad lies with her for a little while. I was wondering what they should do to get her to sleep in her own bed...

Answer 1

yes i have many relatives and friends that have to sleep with someone 2 have decent sleep, my cousin will scream get up and go to sleep with someone.( usually me!!!!!!)

Answer 2

night terrors. let her cry. shes too old for that. kids are very smart they know how to take advantadge of things

Answer 3

it's easy to say that she is spoiled! but before doing that you have to see where this girl is coming from! from what i've gathered she's been through some kind of divorce of her parents or something like it. she could still be traumatized that she's losing the people she loves. for us it might sound silly, but for a 6 year old it's not! the fact that she's waking up SCREAMING shows that she's either having bad dreams or that she wakes up and feels a big sense of loneliness. this little girl needs help in dealing with this situation. she'll probably outgrow it on her own - but do not judge her! i  feel there's something more deep!

Answer 4

She is scared and why is she sleeping at your mom's?

She shouldn't be dragged to a woman's house who is not her mother to spend the night when her dad is just dating the woman.

That is scary to her.She needs security and doesn't have it being shuffled between parents like this.

Answer 5

That is not normal, but there may be a reason why she does this.

she needs to be told, while they are not in the same bed, they are right there with her.  Sleep in a near by bed, close enough for her to see, and have a nightlight so she can see better.

Over time it will get easier, but she has to learn.  

Answer 6

The problem is the child's parents.  They have not allowed her to learn how to sleep on her own.  They have enabled this problem.  The only way to break her of the habit is to not allow her to sleep with anyone, which of course is going to mean having to put up with her screaming at night for awhile until she gets used to being alone.  Obviously her having to sleep with someone has developed over years and it isn't going to go away overnight.  It could take days, weeks, even months to break her of the habit other wise she will need to sleep with someone for the rest of her life.  

Answer 7

Because it is what she is used to, yes she needs it.  My son slept with us for a long time, and we are just now breaking him of it (he's also six).  Still he likes to have his little sister in the same room, and preferably the dog and kitten.  When parents practice attatchment parenting, kids get used to "being attatched."  She will grow out of this in her own time, but the parents should all work together to gently lead her in that direction...I suggest a sticker chart--she gets a sticker for every night she sleeps in her own bed.  When she gets to a predetermined number of stickers (maybe 7 or 10?) she should get a reward.

Answer 8

I think she has already gotten used to sleeping with someone.

Tell her nicely, she has to learn. Yes! Reward her with a sticker every night she sleeps lone. Accumulate to certain number of stickers, maybe 10? and you'll give her a treat. Maybe Ice-cream or so? Something which it's not so easy to get hold of! :)

My nephew who is 5 this year, always want to sleep in the same room as me whenever I stay over at my sis' place. Or he'll do the same thing as your step sis. :) He usually has a maid to sleep in he same room or he sleeps with his parents. But nowadays that 'reward-systems' really works! He learns to sleep by himself nowadays!

Answer 9

This needs to be dealt with firmly, but kindly, and her father has to be on board with it too.

At your house she needs to know that she CAN'T sleep with anyone and she must sleep in her own bed.

One of our foster children had never slept in a crib in her life, she had always slept with her mother or older sister.

At night she and her sister slept in a big bed together, but when her sister was at school, the little one had her nap in the crib - because I said that "all children who live here have to sleep in the crib if they are small".

Her big sister couldn't believe that she would sleep in the crib because she never had before, but here, it wasn't a choice.

She slept beautifully every afternoon while they were in our home, but I would guess that when they went home again, she went back to sleeping with mom or big sister.

Answer 10

I'd say that's way too old for a child to still need someone sleeping with her all the time. The occasional nightmare is different but every night is madness. My 10 year old stepdaughter "needed" someone with her every night until she was about 9. Now she still has someone with her at night on a regular basis. This only happened because it was allowed too. Her mum just gave her whatever she wanted. She was babied way too much. She still behaves like she's a lot younger than she is and has no idea about respecting personal space. She even slept in her mum's bed while her boyfriends had to sleep in the laundry which contributed to the relationships ending. It just showed that she ruled the roost.

The 6 year old's parents need to be firm with her and not give in to tantrums. They need to tell her that she's a big girl now and big girls sleep in their own bed. If she's scared of the dark give her a night light. Her mom should stop babying her and let her grow up.

Answer 11

NO she is doing that because they allow her to do it. Unfortunatly unless her mom stops it also, there isn't much you can do there.  

The way to break it is for everyone to stop doing it.  Let her sleep alone and she will get use to it.   Your Mom's boyfriend needs to talk to his ex wife and tell her.  If I were you I would refuse to do it.  Its his child , let her sleep with him.  Why should you give up your sleep.