Is it normal to propose after starting to plan wedding?

Question

my boyfriend and I have discussed about getting married and decided to do it next year in july. however he hasn't proposed me yet and we already started planning a bit and told just a couple of friends when asked. i know he'll propose me but will people find it weird to get proposed after starting to plan for the wedding? i feel like i can't really say i'm engaged...since i am not ...officialy. when do u think would be the latest month he can propose?

Answer 1

Well, if you can talk about the wedding, you should be able to talk about this too.  I can understand that maybe he wants a traditional romantic proposal (I suspect you do too), but before you go much further in the planning, you should let him know that you feel you should formalize the engagement.  Then step back and let him act, without pressuring him.  He'll get there.  And if he isn't even ready to propose,he certainly isn't ready to get married.

Answer 2

He should definitely propose before any more plans are made and before you tell anyone else you're planning your wedding. A friend of mine started planning her wedding before she was proposed to, and there were a lot of whispers and gossiping around the office we worked in. Besides, you're not officially engaged until he proposes.  

Answer 3

you need to wait until he proposes. dont put the cart before the horse. there is no time limit on the latest he can propose. But generally people get married about a year after they are engaged, because it takes that long to plan a decent wedding.  

Answer 4

My fiance and I starting planning our wedding before we officially were "engaged."  We picked a date, chose a place, put down a deposit on the place, booked our honeymoon, and told friends and family before he ever got down on one knee and presented me with a ring.  Who cares about normal.  Do things your own way.  

Answer 5

My roommate and his now-fiancee did this. In fact, they had it planned for over a year before he proposed that he was going to be the one to propose and then she would tell their parents.

Normal? No.

Wrong? Definitely not.

Something that close friends will rib you about? Ooooh yeah.

Answer 6

If you both agree that you are getting married, you are engaged. You don't have to have the ring or a big showboat thing on one knee. My parents never got formally "engaged", they just assumed they were getting married and started to plan. Now I'm doing the same thing. He'll get me a ring when he finds one he thinks I'll like. It would be weird if YOU were planning a wedding and he'd never mentioned it, but if you had the discussion and set a date, I'd say that's good enough. Frankly, I hate the whole big whoop that goes along with traditional engagement, and I think anyone who is actually surprised by a proposal doesn't know their partner well enough to be getting married. Getting married should be a decision you come to together.

so basically, who cares what's normal, and Congrats!!

Answer 7

NOW.

ask him to kneel down n propose you know.

ok?

congrats!

Answer 8

Getting married isn't only about proposal ( just like in those dramas )

When 2 people are ready to commit means that their relationship has 1 step further. Proposal doesn't really very important as long as you and your future husband to be, both are happy n ready to start a new life. Your married life is much more important than a wedding proposal, right ?

Best wishes

Answer 9

kind of. i mean i think most ppl get engaged first, but it doesnt really matter what order you do it in. some ppl elope n never get engaged, so do whatever you like.

Answer 10

I recently got married...My husband and I discussed getting married and basically "planned" it for a long time before we actually got engaged officially and set any plans in stone. So, we knew we were going to get married for sure long before we were really engaged. I wonder what plans you have made so far... have you booked the place, etc? Basically, what I would do in your situation is, if someone asks if we're getting married I would say yes, but we're not officially engaged yet...  I would also not worry too much about what other people find weird--it's YOUR decisions, not anyone else's. YOUR lives, not anyone else's. So you two can do it however makes you happy. So, to answer your last question: I suppose he can propose whenever he feels like it. Just have a discussion with him to see what he's thinking, if he's planning on making it official. If he is, then just sit back and wait and enjoy it.

Answer 11

Well, an engagement doesn't require a ring - I believe that as soon as two people agree that they will definitely be getting married, then they are "engaged."  

If you've already started planning a wedding, then consider yourself engaged, hon.  Perhaps your fiance doesn't realize that you want the traditional ring + "popping" of the question?

If you're still unsure, talk to your boyfriend about it and see whether or not he considers you to be "engaged."  However, most people don't start planning a wedding until after they consider themselves to be "officially engaged" (except in those cases when someone is daydreaming a bit too much..!).  If your boyfriend is really contributing to the planning of this wedding, then you're probably safe calling him your fiance!

Congratulations, and Happy Planning!