Is it ok for my boyfriend to go to Brazil without me?

Question

Ok so I think everyone is probably going to say I am just being insecure, but I don't know, I need some insight here. My boyfriend of almost a year, (friend for 10 years first!) was asked by his much older and immature friends to accompany them to BRAZIL. This is a all mens' trip and he would be staying for a week. Who knows what they are going to do. I of course told him no. Then I said no you go it's ok. Now he brought it up again and I'm back at telling him no. I told him if he goes to Brazil then I can go somewhere without him, just me and my girls. He didn't like that idea too much. I asked him flat out, will he do anything in Brazil and he said no, why would I...For some reason that is not enough for me I am totally freaking out. Please help.

Answer 1

let him go.  you want him to resent it forever?

Answer 2

i think you can trust him. if it's an all guy thing yeah.

Answer 3

It's only natural to be concerned,especially when he is going with his immature friends who might pressure him into doing something he shouldn't.Personally I would go on my experiences with him.For instance,is he a trust worthy person?Has he lied to you before?If so was it anything to be concerned about?Has he ever done anything to test your trust with him?You are the only one who could judge him in that way.You know his personality.

Answer 4

unfortunately this is a side effect of being a girl!

of course your going to worry because its so far and a week long and hes with his friends but ultimately you have trust him. easier said then done of course but if he says he wont do anything believe him and im sure itll be fine

Answer 5

This doesn't sound like you guys trust each other much!

Answer 6

1 You approached him in a different light. He picked up on it!

#2 You should keep an open mind. If your asking this question, there is doubt!

#3 He should not be upset or insecure himself if your going out with your girls.

It sounds like the kind of tense, on egg shells!

Answer 7

keep in touch with him though out the time he is in Brazil if he doesn't stay in touch somethings going on           untill then stay cool

Answer 8

Well hes being selfish by not allowing you to go on your own trip.

and i wouldn't trust him being in brazil because theres alot of exposure and reavealing outfits due to the hot weather.

Answer 9

If you say no you look like the ***** if you say yes your going to be crawling outta your skin the entire week. Next time he asks say "Do what you think is best" and go from there if he chooses to stay give him a good reason to like make him dinner or something special if he goes treat yourself to a spa day or what not. You have to TRY to trust him. If you find out anything happened then you know sooner rather then later.

Answer 10

I think you should ask him why it's okay for him to go alone with the guys, but not okay for you to go alone with the girls.

Tell him you just feel uneasy about the company and the things that they think are okay are not really same as what you feel is okay for your relationship.

Tell him rather than spending that much money on a fun trip with the guys, you'd like to go somewhere with him.

If money isn't an issue, and the two of you can talk through your uneasiness about it, go ahead and let him know that you'll miss him every day, but he should go have guy time.

He has to realize that you feel the same about him going away as he does about you doing it.

Answer 11

have a girls week that same week, but dont do anything stupid just have fum with your friends!

Answer 12

If you are in a relationship you should trust each other. Let him go to Brazil and you have fun with your friends. It's no big deal.

Answer 13

If it were MY boyfriend .. I'd say H*LL no! It's not that you're insecure it's just that you know how men can be .. especially when they aren't being watched by their girlfriends and are just let loose with their buddies in a foreign place! It's okay for him to disagree with YOU going somewhere but NOT okay when you don't want HIM to go somewhere??!! I don't think so! haha! He should either be able to take you .. or not go at all. OR .. he needs to let YOU go on a trip with YOUR friends .. only fair.  

Answer 14

It sounds like you are both equally insecure.  If you can look beyond your insecurities and give him your ok to go on the trip, then he has to do the same for you.  Make sure it is a deal before you tell him you're ok with it.  It would be just plain stupid of you to give him your ok if he flat out would not do the same for you.

Answer 15

If you trust him then don't worry about it. If you have a strong relationship then everything will be ok

Answer 16

There is no wedding ring on his finger yet, is there?  He's free to go wherever he chooses.

Answer 17

Well if you trust him you should let him go.

Plus you dont want to seem like a controlling girlfriend. Guys dont usually like that. Plan a trip with your friends to go out when he goes to Brazil so you can btoh have a good time and then maybe plan a trip for just the two of you after you both get back? just an idea(:

Answer 18

One, he's a grown man and he can take a trip to Brazil with his older, immature friends all he wants and he doesn't need your permission. AND he can even get drunk and pass out on the beach if he so chooses. If he sleeps with another woman, you'll never know anyway but he'll be too busy with the sausage fest to do it.

Two, for him to think he can tell a grown woman that she can't take a trip with her girlfriends makes him no better than you. Tell him you can take a trip wherever you want, whenever you want, with whomever you want and if he's too insecure to handle that, then he can go find a woman who will let him control her more.

Three, don't take an all girls trip just because he's taking an all guys trip. You'll be miserable and the whole time you'll be thinking about what he's doing. If you plan one, do it because you want to, not to get back at him, because if you try to get back at him, you're admitting that you viewed him going as something bad in the first place, and that makes YOU immature.

If you think your man is going to cheat on you because he's in Brazil with immature friends, what makes you think he wouldn't cheat on you here? If you can't trust him you can't trust him, no matter where he is. And if you can't trust him, you don't need to be with him.

Answer 19

Give it a break.  Let the man go you do not own him nor he you.  It may be a good idea for you to break it off since there is a great deal of distrust on both parts.  Think about it you do not trust him and when you asked him would he agree to your trip he said no.  Break it off and live.