Is it ok to invite the children of family members, but not other guest's children?

Question

We have to keep to a certain number of guests, and children take up places at the tables, the cost of a meal, etc. Is it tacky to not invite EVERYONE'S children?

Answer 1

You can invite (or not invite) whomever you want; however, there will always be those who are unhappy with your decision - you need to figure out if you can deal with this.

Answer 2

if you want certain people to bring their children, on the envelope of the invite write Mr. & Mrs....and family.  that way they know the children are invited.  If you dont want someone to bring their children, leave it addressed as Mr. & Mrs......

Answer 3

Yes, that perfectly acceptable.  In fact, I would say it's an excellent rule and a good way to divide your guest list.  Not many people can argue with you about ONLY inviting children who are family member.  

In addition, it's not the least bit tacky to not invite children of friends.  If a friend has an issue that your niece or nephew was more important than her child, then she really is being selfish and unreasonable.

Most individuals are well aware that weddings are expensive and that somewhere, somehow you need to stop the guest list.  If not, you'd be inviting everyone you've ever said hello to.  I think making family (both adults and children) pripority of your friend's kids is a good way to gauge your guest list.

Don't feel bad.  You are doing a good thing.

Answer 4

I say no. The non-family members may resent other people's children being invited, but not their own. It's best to go all or nothing on this one.

Good luck!  

Answer 5

Absolutely not.  You have to draw the line somewhere, and usually this is an area where you can cut.  Invite the children that are related to you, or children of close friends that you're close to, but your co-workers children do not need to be invited.  I would even keep it to my nieces and nephews, and those children I'm personally close to, and end it there.  I probably wouldn't be inviting first cousin's children, unless I knew them personally and have a relationship with them.  

Be aware though, some parents won't like your decision making on this one, and will choose to stay home with little Johnny and Susie.  Do not be offended by this, that's their prerogative, just as it's yours to not invite the children in the first place.  

I hope you have a wonderful wedding.  Best wishes you!

Answer 6

NO, not tacky at all. Some people might get upset but who cares it's your day. We had the same situation. We made a cut-off that no children under 12. This way it will limit the amount of kids running around and less risk of knocking over the cake. But no one really said anyhting about their kids not being able to come. Some actually are glad to leave their kids home to make it a night for themselves.  

Answer 7

No, it's your day and you can invite whoever you please.  It's not like the other guests are going to get together and see if the other's children were invited before the wedding, they won't even notice until they get there.  People will understand there is a limited amount of space but I doubt anyone would even be so bold as to question it.  If you have close friends with children that you are very close to (or godchildren) it would be polite to ask them though.

Answer 8

No, you can not have some children and not allow others tobring theirs.  Its an all or nothing type of situation really.  

Answer 9

It's fine to only have close family member's children, but no others.

I am always surprised to read posts on here that people are offended when they can't bring their children- everyone I know is glad for the chance for a grown-up evening out and wouldn't want to chase after their kids through a formal reception hall.

Answer 10

I think numbers have a lot to do with it. We invited only my nephew who was 7 and our ring bearer. None of our other siblings had kids and my cousins who have kids weren’t able to come anyway.

But if we’re talking about several kids, I can see the guests whose kids were excluded being miffed.

Lots of venues have children’s meals. I think that at our place, they were something like half the price of adult ones.  

Answer 11

This exact question is why I went from some children in the wedding to NO children... people were just acting like if their child couldnt come it was the end of the world!! So I made it a night wedding, and parents night off!!