Is it ok to tell my mom that she's being too overprotective?

Question

She won't even let me go to the mall with a group of friends. Or to the movies with boyfriend. I have never done anything to make her not trust me. When I ask her if she doesn't trust me or something she says no I trust you I just don't trust the people that will be at the mall who you don't know.

But:

At my mall there's security guards.

And I'll be with a group of friends who will not let anything happen to me.

Or my boyfriend who definitely will not let anyone I don't know even talk to me.

When I'm out with my friends we look out for each other, we know how crazy some people can be.

She won't let me do anything by myself.

Is it ok to tell her that she's being too overprotective?

By the way I'm almost 15 years old.

Answer 1

I think your mam is being a bit overprotective. I was about 12 when i first went shopping with a friend. Her mam came with us but went of to do her own thing and then after that my mam realised me & my friend were both responsible enough, to look out for each other. Get to the mall and from the mall by ourselves. She never really let me go on my own till i was 16, i always had to be with a friend. which i think is resonable. You have to prove to your mam somehow that your becoming an adult and you are responsible enough to hang out with your friends. If your mam doesnt trust them why not invite them over to meet your mum first? So your mam knows who your with and that there nice people. My mam was like that, she always wanted to know who i was with, which is understandable because parents really worry! Just renember, too her your still her baby girl. She needs to let you grow up but know your out and about safely and happily. x x  

Answer 2

You should tell your mother she is being too overprotective, the reason she could be with way is because your growing up quickly and she wants to hang onto you a little longer, relax and act maturly and responsible, talk to her and be honest.

Answer 3

WOuld you have any idea on why is she being over protective.. is this recent..or has she been like this all along.. yes it is not normal to be THIS protective...but try and see if their is a reason behind this.. I  am a new mom and I can understand protection especially about your little girl ( yes you still ar for your mom) thou I get your point of view  as well.. so I would suggest that you talk to her.. calmly ..explain your side and understand hers.. ALso has anything happened in the neighbor hood recently to put  your mum on guard???..

Answer 4

tell her.

and heres some personal advice.

don't make your boyfriend seem like that big of an idea to her. your 14 and she probably thinks that its stupid and not serious. so act mature and tell her its just fun right now.

Answer 5

you can never be over protective you will see when you have kids....

Answer 6

Yes! Tell her before she gets worse

you asked her if she doesnt trust you, and she said she did trust you but not your friends. that's the same thing as not trusting or respecting your judgement. you have good friends, correct? if so, then tell her that. she should trust your judgement.

oh, the mall is okay. but i would be careful with the boyfriend. maybe double date on that one.

Answer 7

yes I think at 15  you should have some  freedom to go out with friends  I am not sure  about having a boy friend  but   if you are always  in a group  its ok.

Answer 8

you should explain somethings to her if she still doesn't listen then why dont you try to make a deal with her and say since your almost 15 that maybe you can do somethings

and that if she lets you do it once that she will see that nothings going to happen

tell her how you feel  

Answer 9

yee tell her or shes neva gonna stop

Answer 10

One thing to consider is where you live. Yes, anything can happen in any community, but....West Oakland (sorry) vs. Sausalito, CA, there are different levels of concern. Have you discussed the individuals you would be going with to the mall? Does your mom know them well? Does she really approve of your boyfriend? I think, with boundaries set, you could negotiate some mall time with her feeling comfortable. Think midday, limited time, etc. I grew up in the 1950's in a small town in the Sacramento Valley....our group of girls would occasionally drive to a town north of us that was much more "exciting"...mom said NO, and I honestly was glad that I could lay it on her to my friends. That is sometimes a great way to get out of things you aren't sure you want to do...Bottom line: what you want to do is normal and expected for your age.  

Answer 11

Tell her and give her these "buts" because otherwise she won't stop being overprotective your entire life.

Answer 12

  yeah !

i told my mom she was being too over protective and then she gave in a bit .

im 14  , and my mom is the same way , pretty much .

it gets on my last nerves !

but , i explained my reasoning to her , and now i have some more freedom .

[:

Answer 13

Tell her she's being to overprotective, that you're 15 and will have your cell phone, about the security guards, and that your friends won't let anything happen to you. Just tell her you KNOW you're ready, and tell her that you'll tell her if something happens and where you are, and if she won't accept it - then you'll just do stuff and NOT tell her.

I'm sorry, but that's so stupid, I'm 13 and have gone places by myself, whatevs, that' SO SO SO SOOOOOOOOOOOOO stupid.

And nnshking or whatever, you CAN be too over protective, because if you do this stuff, you're kids will never learn for themselves, and then you've got a huge problem. You need to let your kids grow up, or they'll be a total baby.

Answer 14

I think you should sit down and have a talk with her expressing your feelings without coming off arrogant, negative, or bossy. Don't say she's overprotective, it might hurt her feelings, I think you should just tell her that your mature and responsible enough to go hang out with your friends. Y'know?

Answer 15

you can tell her...I'm not sure it will do any good, but by all means, tell her and explain your reasoning. Maybe if it makes her feel better, she can drive you there and just meet up with you later in another part?  

Answer 16

you can tell her, but it isn't going to stop.  She is a mother, and that's what mother's do.  worry that something might happen to their babies.

Answer 17

Well I give your mom props for keeping you away from all the trash. I was the same with my daughter. Its hard at your age to understand. I wish just once you young folks could see through our 40 yr old eyes. you would understand what we are protecting you from. My daughter is now 25 and a mother, and she tells me already how she understands why I was the way I was. You sound like a nice young lady and its because of your mom. Stay that way. Good luck!

Answer 18

h**l.yea. if ur almost 15 then yea she's to over protective, ho;y c**p, my mom freaks out when i go in the backyard while my friends are out having fun at the mall. my mom is the kind of mom who will not take that to heart but you can try.