Is it okay to ask for gifts?

Question

We are getting married in Mexico with our closest family and friends. When we return we will be having a wedding reception and will be inviting all of our friends and family. Is it acceptable to register and ask for gifts from the guests that are coming to the reception even though they will not be attending the wedding?

Answer 1

It is not ok to ask for gifts, however it is ok to register for items..kinda like you did for the shower. Most people will assume you are registered at the same place, but if you aren't, IT IS OK TO INCLUDE THE INFO! I had SO many people ask me where I was registered at and why I didn't include the info (I wasn't registered for the wedding). It is not tacky nor rude.  

Answer 2

Good question -

When I got married we included little cards in our wedding invitations showing where we registered. I think you should do the same in the invitations to your post-wedding reception. People will bring you gifts WHETHER YOU ADD THE CARDS OR NOT, however, if you include where you are registered you can turn a several hour trying-to-guess-what-you-want shopping trip into a quick stop at a store to pick up what you've already registered for. If you have ever shopped for a wedding gift, you know how frustrating it can be trying to figure out what to buy. Make it easier for people!

The majority of guests who came to my wedding bought off our registry. We got almost everything we registered for!  

Answer 3

Here is what's appropriate if you really want to register for gifts, although a lot of people find it tacky.... you register, DO NOT include the information in the initiation to the reception, and only tell people where you're registered if they ask.

This is proper etiquette for any wedding, unfortunately many people don't follow it.  

Answer 4

Its never ok to ask and in your case...I wouldnt even register.  it kind of makes it look like your only having the reception so you can get gifts.  people arent stupid...usually if they want to know they will ask and if not they are likely the type to either just give money or whatever else they feel like.

Answer 5

Registering isn’t asking for gifts; it’s giving people who choose to give gifts suggestions. Sending out those stupid “We’re registered at…” cards in your invitations/announcements is asking for gifts. So long as you abide by the normal etiquette rules, meaning you only share your registry info when asked, you’re not being rude at all.

Answer 6

Hi and congratulations on your upcoming wedding!

I think perhaps you worded your question wrong.  I really don't think you meant to say, "can I ask for gifts?"  Obviously, as an adult you know that it is never appropriate to ask for gifts for anything...birthday, wedding, retirement, etc.

That said, I think what you meant to say was "can I still REGISTER for gifts?"  Yes, of course, that is fine!  Anyone that is invited to a wedding reception (even though they did not attend the ceremony), will usually want to bring a gift or a card/money for the newlyweds....so, again, it is fine to register.  

However, please do NOT enclose with your invitation those little annoying business type cards that the retailers give you that say where you are registerd.  That is tacky.  People are smart enough to look at the local stores that couples usually register at and find your registry.  Or, if they ask, then tell them!  But don't include the cards.

Answer 7

It's never ok to ask for gifts. However, it's perfectly proper to register - this way, when people ask you what would you like as a gift, you could direct them to your registry. I had a very small wedding, but a lot of people who knew we were getting married insisted they get us a gift anyway, so the registry came very handy. Do register, but keep this information private unless asked.

Answer 8

Sorry, but no. It's never appropriate to ask for gifts, even at a wedding. Many people will likely bring you one anyhow though.

You can register, since no one will find out about that unless they are planning to get you a gift and ask if you're registered.  

Answer 9

No it's not. In fact, on the invitation for the reception you need to specifically include "No gifts, please", since they were not invited to the ceremony.

Consequences of your choices...

Answer 10

When you send out the party invitation ususally there is a note about where a person is registered.  This doesn't mean you are begging for presents, but if a person wants to get you something they know what you want...right?

Answer 11

It is NEVER acceptable to ask for gifts. You can rgeister but you should never "ask".  

Answer 12

i have a friend who got married in dominican republic with her family and friends. the invitation is for both the weddiing in dominican and the reception back home. but i mean, i already know that they don't really mean to invite me to their wedding but it's more of a courtesy thing. they know that people who aren't that close to the couple aren't gonna spend the money to go to mexico to be at their wedding. at the same time, u'r still invited to the wedding and u just can't make it. so the gift that u would give them at their wedding if u could go, u can just bring at the reception.

Answer 13

if they are not attending they are not obligated to get you anything.  you can register somewhere and in your invites for the reception include a card to where you are registered.

Answer 14

just to a bridal registry.  they'll get it.