Is it possible for lovers to be friends afterwards?

Question

Is it true that friends can be lovers but lovers can't be friends.

The side story is that I split up with my girlfriend and there are no hard feelings between us. Things just didn't work out between us but we are the best of friends. There is still some emotional attachment with the relationship but we are just friends. I noticed that we get into more arguments now then we ever did when we were dating. The arguments are mostly over figuring out each other's boundaries.

She also recently began talking to a new guy and I am finding that it is getting harder to be friends because we were once so close.

Answer 1

yes its absolutely possible especcialy if u guys have a great friendship. but after the break up u need some time away from eachother so ur not so attached. i broke up with my boyfriend and we were still friends afterwards but same thing happend to me as u. were couldnt stop arguing about boundaries and such. but then we didnt talk all summer. we started talking about a week ago and were becoming friends again, but with less arguing and its not so weird bcuz u can see them in a different way other than your lover/girlfriend w/e u wanna call it

Answer 2

It's a tough one, i'm going through that right now and my heart just keeps breaking because I want more.

Answer 3

In my personal experience it doesn't work. Someone always has a little bit of feelings left over for the person...and if they don't initially they will develop again. Think about it, usually people are friends before the date, so being friends afterwards is like doing it all over again. Also, it makes things complicated if the one person does have feelings and the other doesn't. It gets in the way of a pure friendship. For example. I dated this guy for a while and we ended up breaking it off. I wanted to be friends with him because hes a cool guy. However he still had feelings for me so he would try to kiss me still and have s*x with me. I was like dude does friends mean anything to you? Then every time i would turn him down he'd get all pissed off. It was a big mess. Also it depends on if you have or get another girlfriend. Trust me your new girl wont be too keen about you hanging around your ex.

It really depends on the individual people. But all in all i think its not a wise idea.