Is it possible for me to spoil my three and a half week old baby?

Question

My little baby is almost four weeks old, due to a desperate need for ANY sleep, lol, I have been letting him sleep on my chest or with me at night...I have tried everything to get him to sleep for any amount of time longer than his usual 15 min. by himself...crib, swing, ect So my question is am I spoiling him by doing this, I mean, he is so tiny and he loves to cuddle with me but Im afraid I have made some huge mistake and I will never get him to sleep in his crib alone. My mother in law says I should let him cry it out for a while and he will get used to sleeping alone but three weeks seems so young, I dont know. Am I spoiling him? What should I try to do otherwise? Any advise would be appreciated!

Answer 1

oh come on, he's not even a month old!

honestly, all babies are different, you should never let a baby cry it out. you sure can let him cry for a couple of minutes... if the crying doesn't cease in 3-4 min. max, you should pick him up. it just means he needs you. babies are different. my first daughter was just like that, she was a very needy baby... but my second daughter who is 8 weeks old will fall asleep on her own most of the time. sometimes she'll nag for about a minute or two, then fall asleep immediately but if a baby cries, it means he's got needs that should be met.  

Answer 2

there is no way to spoil a newborn. if your afraid, try to put him in his crib to sleep and see what happens. dont let him cry it out, he is way too young, he needs comfort and to feel taken care of. he will eventually grow out of it. just remember you wont be able to cuddle him when he is older so enjoy it:)

Answer 3

No, you are not spoiling him.  You cannot spoil them by picking them up when they cry or by letting them sleep on your chest.  It would be different if the baby was 12 months old or more and could understand a bit more of what you wanted them to do.  At this point doing anything that works is good.  Using a cry it out method is very old school and hard to do.  Some people can do it but they usually recommend it not be done until at least 6 months.  

My baby is 10 months old.  She slept on my chest quite a bit when she was in her first 2 months of life.  Now she is quite independent and has no problems sleeping in her crib.

Best of luck

Answer 4

I know how you feel, three weeks seems very young to let a baby cry but it doesn't take long at all for them to get used to sleeping with you and you'll find it so hard to get him to sleep alone so it is best to get them used to it as soon as possible. If he's only sleeping for 15 minutes then he is stirring before he hits the deep sleep part and realising he's alone and waking up so you need to bite the bullet as soon as possible and get him used to it. Be prepared, it will be soooo hard but so worth it in the end. Just make sure there is nothing else that is waking him, such as a draught in the room or that he's getting to hot. Good luck, it does get better, i promise you.

Answer 5

you are NOT spoiing him...and babies this young are not able to sooth themselves..so letting him cry it out is a bad idea...6onths along is when they are usually able to soothe themselves or cry themselves out.  to be honest my daughter slept with me and my fiance for the longest time..she slept lomger wih us and was more comfortable obviously..but as she got a little older we would put her in the crib and let her cry it out..the first few night she would cry of course..but after a few days, she did fine with sleeping in he crib on her own.  i thhink you are doing fine..there is nothing wrong with letting your baby be comfortable by sleeping with you..it honestly gave me a peice of mind knowing she was safe and warm.

do what you think is right for you..dont let anyone else tell you othewise

Answer 6

You can not spoil a baby that tiny.  If you and your partner are OK with having the baby sleep with you than its perfectly fine and dont worry what others say.  Baby is not used to being alone or anything for that matter, and if he needs your help to sleep I would give him that help.  Good Luck!!

Answer 7

A newborn has no concept of being spoiled but they do know what feels good and being held feels good.  Remember he has been listening to your heartbeat and you voice for quite a while and to be all of a sudden thrown in to a big open crib is different.  What you teach him in these first few months will stick with him possibly forever.  You can try letting him cry it out for a few minutes, this will not hurt and he will get over it.  Then comfort him.  As far as co-sleeping I am against it for safety reasons but many families like it because they seem to think the baby sleeps longer.  The chest sleeping can be very dangerous and possibly risk a SIDS episode, please be careful and good luck.

Answer 8

You can't spoil a tiny baby like that.  You probably don't want them sleeping on your chest forever but you can break that habit as time allows.  Sleep is very important for you right now so go ahead and indulge!

Answer 9

No you absolutely cannot spoil a 4 week old baby. My four month old slept with us, sometimes on my chest until he was 8 weeks, for the same reason. He now sleeps perfectly happily in his cot and he's just fine :)

Answer 10

No! You can NOT spoil a newborn!

You shouldn't let a newborn cry it out.

Your son just wants to be close to you/anyone. Continue to let him sleep on/with you. It won't hurt anyone.

Answer 11

Sorry to be controversial but I believe you can, you should start trying to put him down, hold him whilst he falls asleep but put him back in his cot as soon as he falls asleep. Babies are very clever, and pick up things quickly. My 5 week old niece is already in a routine, she eats, sleeps and wakes at almost exactly the same time every day. she understand that when she is fed, bathed and then sat on the couch between the big cushions with mum and dad not watching her every move that it is time to go to sleep. (I'd just like to add that they do watch her, just not talk to her or make eye contact with her...)remember that babies although they can't quite do things like we can their brains are amazing and they are so clever it's quite unbelievable. However, saying this, their memory at that age is about 2 or 3 weeks, so if you get him into a routine now he will stick to that one, and not the one he has now. :-)  

Answer 12

Here is my wife.

Hi, I would let my baby girl sleep on me during the day for the first 2 weeks of her life, not so much after as that was her choice not mine. It is a bonding experience for you and your son and no one should tell you different. I tried to get her to sleep in a bassinet when she was newborn to  2 weeks and the fact that there was no warmth from the bed was the reason she would not sleep long. On me she would sleep for an hour or more. We started putting her in her crib at 2 weeks old and she has been there ever since. Try using a fleecy blanket when you swaddle him. Sometimes it is the fact that he is not keeping in his own body heat to keep him warm that he will wake up. But you can never cuddle a baby too much when they are that little, my pediatrician told me that. Only when they get to be more aware like 7 months to a year are they knowingly crying to be picked up. Get all the cuddles you can while he is little cause ours is 7 months now and she never wants to cuddle. LOL...good luck.  

Answer 13

you cannot spoil a baby that small try and give him milk before bed and see if that works try rocking him/her to sleep and try leaving him/her for a little bit and see what happinds  

Answer 14

Treasure these moments forever...pretty soon, you're little one won't want to be held and cuddled all that much!  You cannot spoil your newborn!  

My 11-week sleeps in bed with me most of the time, for bedtime and naps.  When she's ready, she can sleep in her crib.  When SHE is ready.

Answer 15

At this age your baby needs to feel secure by your presence and smell, so it is a bit early to separate from him. You are right, as is your mother-in-law that sleeping problems can be set from this age. Best advice from me is to let him fall asleep being comforted, but to put him in his crib as soon as he is settled. Should he wake up immediately, soothe him with your voice and gentle touching/stroking but do not pick him up. It may take a while for him to settle but have patience, he needs to learn to distinguish between sleep time and mummy time. Never let a child this young cry himself out, time enough for that when he is 10/12 months old. Hopefully things will be ok by then, trust your instincts and follow them, you know your child's needs better than anyone. Remember too that children need structure and routine, the needs of the child must be met but not the demands. That is how you avoid "spoiling" a child. Good luck, it does get better even if you may not think so now. x