Is it possible to change my life if it is almost half over and I have predicated it all on lies?

Question

Please, no "See a therapist" posts.

I am 38 and have come from very rough beginnings. My intelligence and wit carried me through until now. However, I have a criminal record, unique job history, and have overcome some severe physical injuries. Despite having a criminal record, I have worked as a legal assistant and a bookkeeper for a few different attorneys and real-estate developers; my background just never came up - I was hired based on the initial impression I made and what I could do for them.

I recently quit my job due to ethical dilemmas believe it or not - my most recent employer treated customers and fellow employees with menial jobs very poorly and illegally in some cases; I couldn't be a part of it anymore.

Anyway, I have been looking for a job for a couple months now and can't get in anywhere due to my record and sporatic job history (surgeries and moving around a lot). If I can get by tose deficits, then I still have to contend with background checks.

I imagine many of you will tell me I deserve whatever I get and that we all reep what we sew. However, I am hoping that someone might be able to give me some advice on how to start over without losing all that I have obtained in terms of education and materialism.

I am having trouble going for S****y jobs, not because I am too proud, but because I am being told I am over qualified. Some have suggested I tone down my resume to make myself appear less capable, but how can I go about doing that? I don't know how to go about it.

I really think I might wind up homeless and could use some constructive advice, so that I don't become a burden to society or attempt to kill myself.

Thanks for your help!

Answer 1

Of course you can turn yourself around. Make a commitment to yourself and keep it. And please don't kill yourself, that's not nice. I say serve people and show them that you've changed. Hope it helps.

Answer 2

There are a lot of jobs that do not require back ground checks.  And you do have options.  Make sure to use the state employment office, job corp , or other employment training center in your area and use your job case manager  to voice your concerns and get assistance on wording your resume and to get ideas on places to apply.  Explore the internet for resources.  If you have a criminal record and also have dealt with serious injuries there might be groups/ organizations that help with those particular issues.  And I do know someone that lived in a homeless shelter and volunteered there, to end up in a paid job there.  We never know what life is going to bring and one thing I get to hear often is "if you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans!"  So yeah maybe where you predicted you would be is not where you are but maybe it is because there is somewhere or something beyond what your mind could imagine in store.  It might not be what you want, it might be just different or not to your liking.  Some of the hardest things in my life though have led me to some of the best and I believe that about you too.  So the answer to your question haha in my hope for you is- yes.

Answer 3

sure you can change. ask your previous employers for references, as well as a few people you've had an in-depth, positive interaction with over the years.

another thing that might boost your resume is to get involved in some volunteer work. not just randomly, but really get involved with an organization that you care about (cancer research, homeless shelter, animal shelter, etc.) committed involvement shows that you are trying to take a step forward.

its hard to focus on that, i know, esp when you really need money, but getting involved in the community will help give you credibility. might also make you some good contacts and help boost your spirits. :) organizations that work with kids will raise flags at a criminal record though.

are you qualified for freelance work? elance.com has all kinds of freelance projects available.

if worse comes to worst, and you end up just needing a job, companies like home depot and starbucks offer full medical benefits for (some) part time employees. take a job like that to build a current solid work history and then keep it part time when you get a professional job. may mean cutting back on your lifestyle (i'm in the same boat, it totally sucks) but it's something at least....

Answer 4

I know you talked about all the challenges. Energy flows where focus goes. So it might be worth writing down all the things you DO want in life and focus on that! It might sound meta-physical or something.

  Just ask yourself why you'd keep doing the same thing you've been doing for the first half of your life when its not worked. Insanity is defined as "Expecting a different outcome while practicing the same input"!

  Btw there's a book and even a movie by the name 'Conversations With God'! Its far from being religious, and its written by a man who used to be in very dire straits!

Answer 5

How about applying for a job as a peer counselor (or group facilitator) for young men or women at a residential facility?  Put together a sample curriculum as part of your 'portfolio' ~