Is it possible to love someone without liking them?

Question

I've heard the phrase, "You don't have to like someone, but you have to love them." I don't understand this. The concept of loving someone doesn't make sense to me without liking them. Thoughts?

Answer 1

Do you have any family members or relatives that might fit the description? That's the best example I can think of.

Answer 2

opposites attract and love is blind you might hate everything about them but there is something that intrigues you. and maybe you don't realize you like the person because your'e to busy hating them. argh! it's complicated. oh! family too. you have to love family because their blood but you hate them at the same time.

Answer 3

I believe you can. For example, you can know someone whose personality you clash with a lot. You may not like the things that they do and you may not appreciate their attitudes toward anything but you can still love that person by appreciating that they are human as well. You can love them by showing them love. Caring about them. Being the bigger man (woman?) Turn the other cheek and love.  

Answer 4

It's mostly to do with family, like sometimes me and my sisters will want to rip each others throats out but we still love each other. If somebody tried to hurt my sister even if we were having a fight I'd still try protect her and vice versa.

It's like you are so comfortable with them you can have arguments but know they'll still be there at the end of the day.

Answer 5

Well I generally agree with other answerers but with one difference. I suppose you are referring to the romantic love one develops over opp. s*x and not the familial love one has for dad, mom and siblings.

I will take the second kind of love and answer your doubt later. Well in familial love, the paradoxical situation is possible. When we were kids, we hated our dads for refusing to get us bicycle when we wanted. As our father we would have loved him but for a brief period we would have hated him or disliked him. Take for example the plight of the daughter whose father or mom says No to the boy of her choice and compels her into marrying another guy. The girl would dislike the parents for that but it doesnt mean she has lost her love for them. Further even though you would dislike a person, say your friend, you would not allow a such person to be insulted by a third party. All of us have gone through our dislikes for our classmates but still go steady with one of them, which shows that you can still love a person and dislike him/ her for their small lapses.

In romance, both your love and liking should go together. I do not see how you can dislike a person and still love him or her romantically. Well in fact only because you start liking a person for their manners, style, flair, calibre, appearance, competency, and the like, you start feeling something more than a like. Can you swear that you are not impressed by your boyfriend's nature, therefore you dislike him and still maintain that you love him so much. You would rather not.

I may be diverting from the topic, it is precisely this cleavage between like and love and the tapering down of liking between the spouses that has lead more couples to seek divorce. Both would maintain that they love each other in that they will not harm them or their children. But the liking is lost and the fire gone. I have seen couples hug each other and kiss and cry showing their love for the other even when the divorce is pronounced, but still firm in their decision to part company. Here they love each other, but dislike each other. In romance both has to co-exist.

In affection, well all of us live with our parents, siblings for decades disliking each other for their irritable manners and ways, but still love them as a family member. It is quite possible with a blood relation.

When the nexus is only body chemistry, I am not sure you can start disliking person and still love him. If you still do, then you are cheating yourself and as I said above, it is heading for a split.

The answer is yes with blood relations, and a Big no when it comes to romance. Try it.