Is it possible to start my life over?

Question

I have been through a lot in my short life span (I am 20 years old), dealing with depression, rejection, dysfunctional family, being misunderstood by peers, parents, my extended family, boys...

I just don't want to deal with it anymore. I feel like starting fresh because I feel like it is the only way that I'll finally have my peace of mind. I am about to graduate from college and I plan on going to graduate school. I plan on moving out after I have completed my studies.

I just want to disappear from my past. I know it'll always exist and I am grateful of my past experiences because they have shaped my personality and gave me a different perspective of life. However, I just don't want to be around my past any longer. I just want to start anew and move on with my life...

Answer 1

It is very possible to start over but be careful not to make the mistake of trying to become someone who didn't go through what you went through.  I have "started over" two or three times and completely turned my habits, attitude, and plans around. It worked very well the first few weeks or months and then eventually came crashing down to anger me and make me more bitter again.  This happened because I was trying to avoid my natural way of thought or horrible people who are and will always be part of my past and future drama.  After two ro three atempts to change my ways I have come to terms with the fact that I must live with the bad in my life and be content with it's existence.  Instead of trying to only see the good in life I have fixed my thoughts on the idea of balance in all things.  There msut be bad to see good and there must be hardship to appreciate peace and success.  I am glad that I had miserable episodes in my life and I am glad that I know what it feels like to hit rock bottom to get up again and then hit rock bottom again and again.  It makes people stronger and wiser in a no BS type of way.  Be proud of yourself that you are aware and thoughtful and full of emotions.  Sensitive people of all types really make the best leaders and teachers and when they are nice they really mean it, not just putting on an act to get waht they want or pretend to be a certain way in order to get praise.  You are lucky to be so introspective and you WILL do good in this world with the mindset of change and adaptation.  I been through this so much that I almost instantly bond to any living thing that changes for the better and belives in improvement.  I wrote alot and the most powerful theme I ever came up with is to live by "Strength Of Improvement" which is equanimity (balance) and vigor (persistence).  Anything in this world that is slightly unbalanced is sure to fall.  Evil is half of the perfect sphere and it can exist to make on stronger and aware of the good out there.  I figure if I try too much to be positive and on a certain path to a goal I am setting myself up to fall because in relativity to balance , I would be extremely unbalanced trying to be one way all the time.  Acceptance is key and so is change.  The only constant in life is change.  You are young and have plenty of time to try some different things and lifestyles with room for error. Practice makes perfect, right?  I will leave you with two quotes.  1) "It is better to light a candle then curse the darkness." 2) "Sometimes the best thing that can happen to a young man is to be thrown overboard and compelled to sink or swim."  YOU ROCK!  

Answer 2

An understanding of why people behaved towards you in the manner they have, that all have a little cross to bear, and all have been hurt or wounded and are instinctively programmed to hurt and harm.

Understanding, reconciling, forgiving others their misdemeanors releases the individual from the vicious cycle of hereditary dysfunctionalism. You are at this juncture, it is not always easy, yet living life, enjoying each moment as a detached observer gains an insight into the workings of this world greater than when we are immersed into worldliness and unable to see beyond the end of our own noses, the predicament and plight of others.

Sometimes it is about forgiving ourselves, letting go of anger, not having undue high expectations of other struggling souls unable to grow from their own pain and basal nature. A perception of the inability to grow in others imbues one with a humility for the good fortune of a generous heart and forgiving nature, at a time others can barely exist together without severe stress and hardship.

Answer 3

When you are ready to move life moves. But you cant erase the past, just try to forget it.

Answer 4

Every moment is a new opportunity to start fresh.  And yes, you are right: Your past helped to shape you into who you are today.  To start anew and move on with your life with what you've already learned, start doing things differently from the way you've always done them or just do new things that you've always wanted to do.  Decide what you want from life.  If you can do at least one small thing every day or even every week to move you towards the life you want, you'll get there eventually.

Answer 5

sure...get rid of all of the things that worry you.  do new things that you've never done before (good things).  stay motivated to change.  pray every night and morning, even if you aren't praying to god.  know that what you put your mind to....you can make it happen.  last add me as a friend on myspace.  my music will put joy in your life.  www.myspace.com/2commakiddldork

take care

Answer 6

Yes that is very much possible. Though you cannot get rid of your memories.

     You will have to be a better judge of what kind of people you want to be around from now on, and you have to have enough self confidence and sense of SELF IMPORTANCE to not let anyone get to you. When I walk down the street and a dog barks at me, I dont stop and bark back. I smile and move on. Its not your problem that some people cant get enough attention and they need to get a power fix by telling you what you should do with your life or what you should believe or how you should behave.

Be with people who make you feel empowered. Who respect who you are and do not try to mold you into a habit monkey of their liking.  We may feel sometimes that we owe others something, but that is not the case. Of course we have to be a better human being but we ultimately decide what is good or bad and not have anyone impose their own value judgements on us, or decide for us what is good for US. Everyone tries to pretend in our everyday dealings that they are the voice of COMMEN SENSE, but they are actually pushing their personal agenda behind that cloak.

May be the descisions you made before were influenced by the people around you. You couldnt do what you really wanted to do because there was so much peer pressure. But if you really wish to change your life from now on , you have to decide how much emotions you wish to invest on whom. It is not too difficult to have someone rant about something to you, and you not caring at all about what they have to say.  

Answer 7

Mourner, wherever you are

Wherever you are at the cross there is room

Tell your burdened heart

Your burdened heart at the cross there is room

Tell it in the Savior's ear

Cast away your every fear

Only speak and He will hear

Hallelujah, everyone

Everyone can come to the cross

It doesn't matter what you've done

Everyone can come to the cross

Sinner, come today

Come today, at the cross there is room

Blessed thought for everyone

For everyone can come to the cross

Now a living fountain, see

Open there for you and me

For rich and poor, for bond and free

Tell it in the Savior's ear

Cast away your every fear

Only speak and He will hear

  (by Michael W. Smith)

Answer 8

the best way to start over is to give yourself time away from the things that hurt you.  Become successful and more confident, then go back and sort things out.  Your two lives will come together and you will feel happy.

Answer 9

Definitely! You're only 20 years old..still young to me. Apply out of state for grad school if you want or somewhere far away from your hometown because you will really grow on your own. It also makes your relationships with your family and friends much stronger because you will realize so many things when living on your own. I never really liked my hometown until I moved out of state (from Cali to Ohio). Now I realize what I've been missing and what I am capable of doing on my own as well. So definitely move to a place that is unfamiliar to you so that you will be able to become more independent (away from family and friends) and just doing your own thing. It also makes coming home for the holidays and summer much better. Hope everything works out for you. ^_^

Answer 10

yeah i reckon

if you move away people will know who are are now, and that personality will shine through

you don't have to deal with what people think  you are/were

you'll be judged on what you want to be, rather than what you were

good luck!

Answer 11

Literally no because you cant actually be reborn but it is totally possible to start afreash - but wouldnt the patterns of behaviour you learned in the 20 years influence the choices you make in the new life? Therefore you cant start completly anew until you change any self destructive ways of thinking which may sabortage your new life. Your past has a way of creeping up on you and into your life without you knowing it.

Answer 12

When you truly love yourself and who you are , and are truly thankful for the greatest gift you have recieved you,you  wil feel brand new.

Answer 13

Yes, it is totally possible!!

When you have moved on and learned to emotionally let go of your past (not forget, but accept and make peace, and move on), then you'll be able to immerse yourself in your new life.

I found I have a new life at college far from home. I don't live near the problems and I met people who understood me, thus, I was able to discover the joys of life!!

Best of luck!  

Answer 14

A good move would help.  If you had the means or money just getting away from it all and starting new would do it.  Even just moving out could do the trick.  I'd look forward to that being the start after you complete your schooling if that is what is forcing you to stay.

Answer 15

yes u can change ur life