Is it pretty normal for a sibling of an adopted child to?

Question

claim that every thing needs adopting?

My 3 year old daughter finds bugs and worms. She catched them and when I tell her to let them go, she claims that their mommy and daddy died and ther she need adopt them.

I she sees something that is the last one (like a stuffed animal at the store)she says it misses it's mommy and daddy and that we need to adopt it.

Also the other day I was taking photos of a friends newborn twins and she her brother were asking if we "could have one".

Has anyone elses kids done this?

Answer 1

From an adoptive mom's prospective this is "normal" for very young children like your daughter. They do not quite fully understand the term adoption. My dd did the same thing....now of course she understands adoption better.

ETA

    The poster above me...Network Mommy  LOL  garden snakes in the pants and washer!!! :-P

Answer 2

When I adopted my girls, my boys were 7 and 5.  Their sitter was farther along in the adoption process and had three boys, two of which were the same age as mine.  They brought their baby girl home and my boys were there every day after school going through that process with her own children.  So when it came time for us to pick up our girls, my boys seemed to understand exactly what was going on.

Then the Kindergarten teacher told me that my youngest son explained to many of his classmates that "boys come out of Mommy's tummy" and girls get "picked out and come from other houses"!  Sooooo, we figured out that our boys were perfectly OK with getting little sisters, but thought ALL girls are adopted!  lol!

So, yes it is normal.  She's trying to participate in the process the only way she knows how.  She'll figure it all out.  Have fun with her imagination.  She sounds very creative and caring.

Good luck.

Answer 3

I think that it sounds sweet and she is only 3 yrs old...

Often kids will say they want a baby just like mommy as well...

You might try saying that we cant adopt everything and everyone as much as you would like too. And then explain adoption when she is a little older

Answer 4

She sounds sweet and doesn't quite understand the whole adoption thing. Just explain it to her .... tell her that the other bugs will adopt the ones she finds or the other teddy's will adopt the last one.

Answer 5

"Pretend" play of just about any sort is normal and healthy at 3 years old.  It means that she understands and is trying to practice what she knows.  Maybe it is your turn to ask her:  how do you know the mommy frog isn't waiting for her baby to come home and eat the dinner that she caught for him?

Answer 6

Yes, I think play and pretend is how some children Process the  stories of their lives....  It is how they put things into proper order in their minds....

Our son has done a lot of this--and this kind of play has gone in cycles...

Our 10 year old (emotionally 5) daughter has been processing the fact she has a younger brother and sister placed in a different family---she identifes with the sister as she has one of her brothers... so she has changed the Name of all of her stuffed animals and dolls to her sisters name....

It is part of the way children play and make it mean something...

Our son went through a spell where all the garden snakes were his sons he adopted... It was okay except that I really had a terrible time pulling them out of his pant's pockets but even worse from the bottom of the washer when they slipped past me.... he was about 3 when that went on....

I would see the play action of a sibling part of her way to identify not only with the adoption process but with you... When my mother was pregnant with my younger brother I was too... and then when my baby brother was born I had an Imaginary Friend appear--she stuck around until my brother was up and playing with me....

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Answer 7

i think that it is sweet what she is doing

Answer 8

LOL I think that's so cute!  I've never been in the situation before, but it's completely understandable that she would do that.  I think it's a really positive thing.

Answer 9

My son was 13 when we adopted our two younger children, so he was a bit too old for pretend games.  My younger nieces, however, would "play adoption" with dolls when we first started the process.

Answer 10

yea i guess so