Is it proper to address a widow?

Question

My grandfather passed away not to long ago. Although I've sent cards to my grandmother, I've never really thought about how I addressed her name on the envelope. They were married for over 60 years and they are old fashion and only figured she would prefer to be addressed as Mrs. John Smith. Is this proper or should I just address it as Mrs. Jane Smith? Which one?

Answer 1

I don't know your grandmother.. so i don't know if she's old fashioned or not. The best thing to do is to address her as Mrs. Smith. That way you're not reminding her of the love she has lost even though she thinks about it all day. Doing it either one of your ways could remind her John's gone! hope that helped!

Answer 2

The first one in more appropriate for someone of her age, especially if she's old-fashioned.

Answer 3

it is proper to address as Mrs. John Smith...she is still married to him, but is now a widow....

to address it to Mrs Jane Smith would be very disrespectful so soon after her loss...

should she chose to change she will indicate such...after 60 years I think she will remain Mrs. John Smith...

Answer 4

Mrs. Jane Smith would be the more correct choice, since her name is not John.

Answer 5

It is most proper to address her as Mrs. John Smith.  This indicates a woman who is married or widowed.  

To address a woman as Mrs. Jane Smith indicates she is divorced.

I would bet your grandmother knows what different forms of address mean and appreciates your addressing correspondence to her correctly.  As a widow myself, I appreciate your thinking of how something as simple as addressing an envelope will make her feel.  You must be a very kind person.