Is it proper to tell the children that they have different fathers at a very young age?

Question

I have two kids from two past relaitonships. I ws so open to them about their fathers and they seemed not to mind it at all. what do oyu htink would be the effect of this to their relationship as brother and sisters?

Answer 1

Well, there's not a whole h**l of a lot you can do about it now.  What's done is done.  

And I don't think it will have any negative effect in regards to their relationship as siblings.

Answer 2

hi i dont think it will matter to them at all. If they ask, tell them the truth. but as long as they have you and each other then it makes no difference. hope this helps

Answer 3

My children knew that they had different fathers.  I was always open with them.  I got mad at my neighbor for telling my kids that they weren't really siblings since they had diffenrent fathers.  Things have never been the same.  When they are mad they tell each other that their father is an a##hole ect.  And also say things like your not my real brother.  I support the relationship they have with their father.  

Answer 4

I was always aware that I had a different father than my brothers and sisters. Because I was the only child with my parents (dad had two boys from previous marriage, mom had 4 kids from previous marriage) it was important that I did not think of my brothers and sisters as half so I wouldn't feel excluded. We were all very close and never called each other half sister or half brother. Our parents stressed the fact that we were all siblings who happened to have different last names. We all still feel this way.

Answer 5

I think it's great that you told them at a young age. My brother had a different sperm donar (i wont call the guy his dad) We have the same dad in our eyes! But anyways when I was younger around 6 or 7 my brother got into a fight and he snapped at me that he wasn't even my real brother and I was like whatever you liar!! And I went and told my mom what he had said and she had to then sit me down and explain to me that Shane came from a different man than I did. I was blowin away. Pretty confused. But in the end we really knew who the man was that we call dad is the same man and he is the greatest!!! =)

Answer 6

I think it's important we don't pass on our own narrow views to our children.  Some people may think having 2 different fathers is taboo or ghetto. I say, it makes no difference.  It is what it is.

Answer 7

you need to tell them.. i had an aunt... so i had to cousins... my older cousin was half guatamalon...so he was sooo dark and dark haired... my other cousin ( his little sister) blonde hair, blue eyes, and the palest skin... my aunt never told them they had different fathers... then one day my mom acccidently said something about it in front of my cousin ( the girl)... of course my older cousider new he had a different dad... but they had never told his little sister... and she was heart broken.. of course everything is ok now but why lie to your kids?? they should know... they are still brohter and sister and will still love each other..

Answer 8

I don't think you should tell them until they are atleast 8-10.

Answer 9

yes because it is there right i have a friend who found out at 4 her and her sisters had different parents

Answer 10

Tell them the sooner the better...it might be easier for them to handle it in the long run...if they find out later, it might be a shock. You can avoid that shock right now. I have step daughter, son, and baby to come in 5 wks...If you wait, its because you are holding something and may be setting up shame...There is no shame...what is done is done and you could never regret your kids. Just tell them as soon as possible...Make it so its normal and you don't come later with some "news". My daughter ('cause I hate the "step" part) loves her little brother and can't wait for her sister to come...

Answer 11

I would tell them! if you don't until they get older, they might get upset, and you know at being an older age, like a teenager, the emotions go flying!

Answer 12

If you don't tell them someone else will. Who would you rather they hear it from?

Answer 13

Kids are pretty resilient and if you are open and honest with them and let them know they will always be brother and sister then you are fine.  Kids know when things are not the same and will find out eventually and have more questions so telling them and being up front isn't all bad.  

Answer 14

I think it is best to be honest.  I really don't think it affects the way they view their sibblings.  

Answer 15

it wouldnt have a bad effect on their relationship I think is good that you told them now and not drop it on them when they are older

Answer 16

it's done. don't fret about it.

and paternity doesn't matter. if you grow up with someone, they're your sibling. same parents or no.