Is it rude for me to list gift registry infmation inside a baby shower invitation?

Question

also, is it rude for me to hand write "non registry gift ideas" on the back of the registry card?

I ask because a lot of times people do not buy from the registry but I want to kind of "steer" those gifts in a certain direction. My sister, who I am throwing the shower for, is very organic. For instance, I would like to say on the back of the registry card

"Non-registry gift ideas include glass baby bottles, cloth diapers, organic baby lotions and soaps....this baby is going green!"

Wouldi t be totally rude of me to include that with the invitation (the invitation also states the baby is being raised green)? I don't want to come across as bossy or greedy at all. So I really want to know what you think. We just have seeen lots of petroleum based baby oil and plastic diapers as part of gift baskets at baby showers and these are not things my sis will use. Please give me your thoughts on this!

Answer 1

Wow.  I guess I'm going to be the lone voice of dissent.

Have you read any etiquette books?  It is NEVER appropriate to include registry information with an invitation!  NEVER.  And it is NEVER appropriate to write in the invitation that "the parents only want green gifts."

The people who are being invited to a baby shower should already know the parents well enough to know that they are environmentally conscientious.  And, the people invited should be close family and friends.  When the guests call you, or the baby's grandmothers, to ask about the registry or gift ideas, THEN it's appropriate to say "Susie and Brad have registered at Target.  They're really interested in raising the baby using "green" products."

No matter what you tell people, no matter how many little cards get mailed out that say "the registry is," the guests are going to buy what they WANT to buy.  Your sister's job, as the shower honoree, is to smile, say thank you, be gracious, write a lovely thank-you note, and then take back anything she won't use and exchange it without ever telling the guests that this is what she did.

Try Emily Post or Judith Martin for good etiquette guides.

Answer 2

If you register at more than one store, it is gratuitous to put all of them on your baby shower invitation.  However, you shouldn't let that prevent you from registering at several stores.  You can't possibly find one store that has everything you want without compromising.  I registered only at Babies R US, and I compromised on my crib and stroller.  I deeply regret it.  

I recently found out about a site called Amazing Registry, http://www.amazingregistry.com   It will bring together all the gifts you registered for from all the stores you registered at and display them on a single page. They give you your own free baby registry website like http://www.amazingregistry.com/Moncada that you can give out to your friends and family and put on your shower invite. It also shows you what was bought when from what store, and other neat pieces of information like how many gifts are still available, and their average price. You can also add a message to your friends and family on your registry website.

Using that site, you don't have to compromise, and you have a succinct way to put your baby registry on your shower invite.

Answer 3

I say OK to mention registry, not OK to mention gift ideas.

Answer 4

This is a little tough. Everyone knows that shower invitations mean that gifts are expected, but at the same time it is ill mannered to expect gifts, so it is also considered ill mannered to include gift ideas or registry info on the invitation.

I know, it makes no sense and most people totally disregard etiquette these days when it comes to this sort of thing, but on the slight chance that some of your older friends and family members still abide by the old school rules of etiquette, I can assure you they will be offended by the mention of gifts.

If you mention on the invitation ( maybe even more than once)that the baby will be raised green, include a phone number for the guest to RSVP and make certain that the person answering the calls is aware of the registry, you should be fine. The guests curiosity will probably make them RSVP just to find out how "green" this baby really is, making your life much simpler. You'll have a good head count for the shower AND you'll have the opportunity to politely mention the registry and explain what "green" means to the few that may not know.

Answer 5

Gift registry information is never a problem, just mention whether or not you don't mind people giving non-registry gifts (it is probably best to allow non-registry gifts)

Don't put a list of products you want- that restricts people and makes you come across as too demanding.

DEFINITELY recommend or suggest (but don't force) that green products are especially appreciated.

Answer 6

you can put registered at Target

but not nesscessarily specific gift items

Answer 7

It is not rude they just need certain things that's all.

Answer 8

Yes of course it's Ok, if not we would all end up buying the wrong gift. Love the Idea of knowing " this Baby is going Green"  As a gift giver i really want to know what you need, or what the color schem is. Anything to help be pick out the perfect gift. It is important to me that the receiver is happy with the gift that I have given them.

Answer 9

Not rude at all! thats what registry's are for! and its better for you to suggest things you will need/use than for someone to waste their money on something that will go to waste. give them the information and if they choose not to use it then shame on them!