Is it rude to come over uninvited to someone's home?

Question

For example, the person called your house a number of times. You ignored it intentionally (you have call display and can see they called, you ignored it because you were sleeping). They always assume your home. They call the very second they know your gone from work. Your tired and always want to either sleep or go to the gym after work and don't want to be bothered. But, they show up at your doorstep anyways. Would you consider this rude? If so, what would you do in this situation? I always feel guilty saying no I don't want to do anything (I'm not a confrontational guy and they know this). So what should I do in this situation?

Answer 1

Put on your pj's and answer the door that way.  Tell them you were sleeping, and need to go back to sleep if you want to function at work.

Answer 2

Tell them nicely that it's not a good time for you and you need some sleep or go to the gym etc. Keep at it and hopefully they will get the hint. Be firm. They are bothering you, not you them.

Answer 3

wow, that's really rude. that seems stalker-ish too. if i couldnt take it anymore, i would straight-up tell them that it's not cool and that they're bothering me. if this is your girlfriend or boyfriend, you should leave them.

Answer 4

Yes, it is rude.  People do not have the right to invite themselves into your home or continue to call you.  That is a bit like stalking.  Just say no and let others know that you prefer them to call before coming so you can decide if you wish guests.  Your home, your time, your decision.  It's not confrontational to let people know how you wish to use your time with or without others.  And certainly if you are not calling someone back, they have no right to just stop by.  Make it clear that you will call them if you wish to see or talk to them.  It's really all right to do.

Answer 5

yes it is rude because it puts you in a position of having to be rude- ie, not asking him/her in.  However, if this is how it is going, you need to say something.  "I would like for you to call before coming over."  period.

Answer 6

Yes, it is rude. But you don't have to give them a reason. Don't let them in and just say, "Sorry, I can't talk right now." If they persist, say, "Sorry, gotta go" and politely close the door. Let them assume you are on the phone (but don't say so).That way, you haven't confronted them but they have presumably gotten the message. Handle them as you would handle Jehovah's Witnesses. Calm, cool, collected, but definite.

Answer 7

no because its not like they know your tired and maybe he/she is worried if you never answer your phone when that person calls

Answer 8

Not only rude, but stalking, as well. He's stalking you. Give him a fair warning. If he doesn't listen, then you might have to report him for trespassing.

Answer 9

It sounds like your friend is being very rude.  Even though you try to avoid confrontation you will probably have to say something to this person if you want it to stop.  

Answer 10

Wow, ok there is a lot of things going on here and a number of possibilities. But, first to answer your question directly I say NO. Its not rude to go to someone elses home uninvited. However, it is rude to go to someone elses home REPEATEDLY uninvited. Now, in your case, your guest could be showing up because they are worried about you, which is perfectly reasonable if you arent responding to their calls. Yeah, I know you are thinking that they should be getting the hint, but why does it have to be a hint from your end in the first place. You said they know you are not a confrontational person, so maybe they do get the hint but want you to nut up and say what it is you mean instead of hinting around. Additionally, when you do end up talking to this person, what are you telling them and how are you acting towards them? Because if you are telling them that you have just been busy and no time to talk to them and act like its not intentional then h**l, your the one sending out mixed messages which is what often happens when people who dont have to guts to just say what they mean but try to beat around the bush and take care of the problem with the "hinting" game.

To tell someone no does not mean that the situation is going to be confrontational. Learn how to say NO. It feels pretty good actually one you break the ice and start doing it. What you should do is stop playing cat and mouse with this person. YOU call them up and tell them that you would really appreciate it if they did not make any more unannounced visits to your home and that if you dont answer the phone its because you are not home or dont want to talk. You can say all this without being harsh and mean about it. Its a lot easier to face someone who you have been honest with than it is to run into someone whom you have been avoiding, or trying to anyway.

Answer 11

Yes. It's rude.

Tell them you can't talk to them right now and tell them to please call you first.

Answer 12

Ignore the door and the phone. If they catch you outside always be in a huge hurry, life or death, most go, can't stop, bye bye and GO.

Answer 13

its very rude. my friends do it all the time to me and i hate it. this is a stupid question.

Answer 14

If I am in the mood not to answer the phone,  I also do not answer the door.  Problem solved.   You might want to get a cheap video system so you can see who is at the door without actually having to walk to the door.  

Answer 15

If you know how they are, you need to address the situation.

When they call, answer it.

Tell them you're busy

If they show up uninvited, tell them you're busy.