Is it rude to straighten out a stranger's collar if it's upturned?

Question

I was sitting on a bus today and the woman sitting in front of me had the back of her collar upturned. She didn't know it, so I reached forward and straightened it out. She turned and gave me a dirty look and I explained and she seemed okay with it. Is it okay?

Answer 1

You should have just said something.  I'd be rather taken aback if a stranger started touching me on the bus without a word.  That was probably something she could have fixed herself anyway.

Answer 2

Yes it is rude to do so today in a nutty and violent  society.

, There are a lot of  nuts in our society today.. You may have good intentions and it is a reasonable and kind thing to do .. but should you straighten a collar without permission of the person NO

You may approach them and tell them, about the collar, and they may thank you and upturn it themselves but dont do it without permission.

Answer 3

Please dont do these things. I have PTSD and social phobia, and a person with my conditions might turn around and hit you. So its best not to touch strangers without permission.  

Answer 4

Just tell them, but do it politely

Answer 5

Yes its rude.

Answer 6

You know, it's really not such a good idea touching strangers at all for any given reason. Some people take it quite personally. Next time, just say something first.

Answer 7

That probably is a little rude, unless you're in your seventies (people seem to be ok with stuff like that if they know you're old). I would at least say something about it first next time.  

Answer 8

i think its weird. even though meant in a nice way, its strange to have someone just touch you. there are a lot of weirdos.  A polite notation of the collar and an offer to help would probably be better.

Answer 9

That was very kind of you to fix her collar but i think you should of made her aware of what you were doing, say if you have of did it to the wrong person. You might of got a slap in the face instead of a dirty look. So next time just tell the person first.

Answer 10

You should probably tell her that her collar is upturned first before you fix it...some people don't like being messed with at all...lol

Answer 11

WHAT THE HECK!!! I would freak! Some people, like me are really defensive. Im so used to men TRYING to touch me and grab at me that when I feel someone touching me I snap. Dont do that! Next time, ask politely if you can fix her collar.  

Answer 12

It is rude and illegal to touch someone in the US without their permission unless it's a life threatening situation.

Answer 13

Its probably best if you tell someone instead of fixing it cuz someone may get mad and hit you or something.lol

Answer 14

Thats weird. If it is bothering you tell them but don't do anything yourself. (PS this goes for tags sticking out of shirts 2)

Answer 15

Yes. At the very least, it's rude. You meant well, but unwanted touching is technically assault. I'd at least ask before straightening the collars of strangers. Some people (like me) would find it amusing. Others may freak out.

Answer 16

lol i wouldda said hey lady im gonna fix your collar of your shirt ! then fixed it lol

^_^

Answer 17

The initial perceived rudeness was unannounced unwanted personal contact. In todays violent society, one must be careful about whom one touches. A  simple warning "um, excuse me, may I fix your collar for you?" May save your life.

Answer 18

I think it is offensive to a lot of people if a stranger touches them to rearrange their clothes. Your intention was good but  most people just want to be left alone.  

Answer 19

I would say it isn't okay to do that.  You could tell her politely that her collar was upturned, but it's generally a bad idea to fix it yourself.  I'd freak if you did that to me.

Answer 20

No... But only if you start by saying: "Excuse me miss (or sir). Your collar is upturned." Then pause for a moment and see if they go to straighten it themselves. If they don't (or can't because their hands are full or otherwise occupied) slowly and casually reach for their collar and straighten it for them. The same goes for tags sticking out. I've helped many a person by doing it this way and they are always grateful. I have yet to encounter someone who got upset or freaked out by employing this method.

Answer 21

that's a little weird...like do you have ocd???...cuz its not that big of a deal if someone's collar is upturned....