Is it their business?

Question

Me and My husband just got married, and now his little sister, who is 13, has butted into our business, My husband wants to adopt my son, and give him his last name, but his little sister doesn't think he should. I think she is hearing if from her mom, who is my husband's step-mom, what should I do about this? His little sister is now saying he could have found someone else better, and she is harrassing us. I think she is jealous about us getting married. How should I handle this situation

Answer 1

The questions is not "How should I handle the situation" but "How should my husband handle the situation?"

He needs to stand up to his sister (and step-mom if she's the real mouthpiece) and tell them to butt out.   You shouldn't have to stop your meddling in-laws.  That's his job.  And if your side of the family acts up, it's your job to handle it.  Otherwise there are more bad feelings towards the spouse.

Answer 2

Why are you listening to a 13 year old. You and your husbands business shouldl be private.

Answer 3

she's thirteen and a brat.  tell her to mind her business before she gets her @$$ slapped.

Answer 4

She's 13?  Shouldn't she be watching Hannah Montana or something?  Your husband shouldn't even be taking advice from a achild?!?!  Tell her to mind her freaking business or you will start a rumor in her school, something to embarass the h**l out of her!

Answer 5

She's a child.....you and your husband are adults.

This is between the two of you.....and no one else.

Do what makes you and your husband happy.

Answer 6

first of all it's not just your problem. it should be your husband's too. you need to talk directly to him and tell him how this situation is affecting you and see what he does. honestly, just get this tantrum throwing teen out your head. don't let her selfishness dominate your happiness and peace. if she wants to talk let her talk. don't give it any importance, ignore her at your best! it's not worth the stress to think about what she does or says. what matters is what your husband does and says.

Answer 7

You should talk to your husband and have him deal with his family. He should tell them that they need to respect him, you, your son, the marriage and the family or they will be kept at a distance from all of you.

What you should handle is making him feel like your hero for defending his new family and let him know how proud that he is there for you and your son, including the adoption. You know how to make him feel good and want to do whatever necessary to make a future for your family. Get the books "Woman Power", "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands", and 10 Stupid Things Couples Do to Mess Up Their Marriage", read and apply them.

Answer 8

She is thirteen and even tho she is a big part of the family, she probably feels threaten by the adoption issue. She is probably thinking that she will loose out on her place in the family.

If it is going to cause that much trouble, why change the name. Its just a name. You can still love someone no matter what their is.

Answer 9

She's a 13 year old baby....and acting like one.

Your husband should put little bratzilla in her place. In a firm no nonsense tone of voice he should tell her he will not tolerate her disrespect of his marriage, and she should keep her nose out of the business of adults, and most certainly his marriage.At her age she should be more concerned with her Barbie dolls than her big brother's marriage...maybe if he tells her that she'll back off.

I think she's also jealous of the attention he's showing your son.....and I guarantee it will also surface should you become pregnant before she grows up. As far as you are concerned, ignore it,as hard as it may be.

if she gets totally out of hand, then you are perfectly within your rights in your own home to tell her to mind her mouth or she will not be welcomed back until she does.

As far as the step-mom, ignore her, too. Concentrate on having a good marriage thus proving the woman wrong....good luck.

Answer 10

Well i dont know how old you are...but you are an adult i am assuming and you have a 13 year old adolecent making choices for your marraige!! Thats a lot of power to give a kid!  I mean she was 12 a year ago...get what im saying? She wasnt even a teenager yet. Think back on all the choices and thoughts that you did when you were her age, are you the same? No. You grew up and got married and youre an adult. A 13 year old doesnt know what she wants for herself, much less, for a married couple. And a good way to handle this is to sit her down and ask her!! Tell her lovingly that you want to know her 13 year old reason for this....i think if she comes up with her own thoughts and reasons then its just her being jelouse or wanting to butt in. If she has not a clue as to why she doesnt want to see your sons last name changed, well then probobly there is someone else (as the mother) involved.

For the most part, just do it hun. Whats stopping you? A 13 year old and worse case senerio her mother?? Its not their marraige. I think if the mother has a problem with it then she should be a woman and stop using a kid to address it and come to you directly.